Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Soooo, I've been asked out for dinner tomorrow night. I'm very flattered and I'm looking forward to it. Although it's a little soon for me to be thinking about anything heavy, I don't want to put him off too quickly, so I was wondering what to say if and when the question is asked; "So, what happened with you and your latest ex?" I really don't want to launch into a big, heavy discussion about being cheated on and give him the whole "woe is me" thing, it's just too much for a first date. Also, I'm not a fan of discussing exes, I think it's largely irrelevant and can colour the picture in a not too accurate or pleasant way. But what to say without being dishonest or seeming cagy? Any advice much appreciated, as always
sb129 Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Hey Ripples good to hear you have a date! I hope it goes well. Do you really think he will ask about your ex? Isn't one of the golden rules of a first date to NOT talk about exes? If he does ask, try and deflect the topic, just say its a long story that you don't want to tell on a first date, as there are other much more interesting topics you would prefer to talk about. make it light- ie "oh i won'tbore you with that old story tonight!"
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 You know, you're spot on (again!). Down to earth common sense is something that's flown out the window for me - I'm so stressed/excited! Thanks you SB
sb129 Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 The only thing you should be worrying about is WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR!!!! Get thee down the High Street this MINUTE Cinderella, you SHALL go to the ball and you SHALL wear a foxy new outfit. I think a foxy new outfit is more than justified given the occasion. You have an excuse to shop!
alphamale Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 I think youre sexy RIPPLES....*ahem*...moving along. If he asks just say you wish to not discuss it at this particular time or make up some other bull****.
Art_Critic Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Give a BS answer.. something along the lines of.. We grew apart.. or we just weren't meant to be together.. or.. he moved Don't say anything about.. we are still friends.. or we split as friends.. that is a sign of something deeper No reason to get detailed.. sometimes we ask those questions as a gauge to see if the person launches into an all out assault on the ex.. I will do this very quickly myself..
alphamale Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 No reason to get detailed.. sometimes we ask those questions as a gauge to see if the person launches into an all out assault on the ex....I will do this very quickly myself.. ha ha ART....once I asked this chick about her ex and she launched an all-out assault on ME
Art_Critic Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 ha ha ART....once I asked this chick about her ex and she launched an all-out assault on ME ......I'd be like..... okay..... nice knowing ya.. exit stage left
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 SB, YES! AC, yes, that's kinda why I thought he may ask - to gauge my vindictiveness Ok, I think I'm going with SB's suggestion. If we want to continue to see each other after I've managed to knock over both our drinks, split food down my top, fallen over on the way to the loos and insulted his mother, it'll come up at a more appropriate time, I'm sure. AM - teehee!
sb129 Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 SB, YES! AC, yes, that's kinda why I thought he may ask - to gauge my vindictiveness Ok, I think I'm going with SB's suggestion. If we want to continue to see each other after I've managed to knock over both our drinks, split food down my top, fallen over on the way to the loos and insulted his mother, it'll come up at a more appropriate time, I'm sure. AM - teehee! Don't forget to get blind pissed and puke on his shoes. (not the lovely new outfit)
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 Ehehehheehehh! You're psychic, SB! Now, do I go for the whip or the chains outfit... first impressions very important...
Art_Critic Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Ehehehheehehh! You're psychic, SB! Now, do I go for the whip or the chains outfit... first impressions very important... I would suggest that you talk about anal sex.. get that out of the way right away..
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 Will do AC. You just want me to crash and burn on the first date, don't you? Don't you? Actually, I am damn excited about it. Gotta be a good sign that I'm over the ex!
alphamale Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Actually, I am damn excited about it. Gotta be a good sign that I'm over the ex! if your privates are getting wet then you're definitely over the ex
Art_Critic Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 You just want me to crash and burn on the first date, don't you? Don't you? ... Lets not bring up burning and sex in the same sentence... I want to to go out and have fun.. don't get all stresses out and treat the conversation as if you have known him forever
justagirlforever Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 I'm quite sure he wouldn't ask about your ex. If he does (especially on a first date) he's just rude. So don't worry about that! ooo - but exciting! enjoy your date (exciting is definitely a good sign that you're either over your ex or certainly almost there).
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 Yeah, yeah, I won't be jumping around screaming "I'VE GOT A DATE!" in the restaurant.
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 I'm quite sure he wouldn't ask about your ex. If he does (especially on a first date) he's just rude. So don't worry about that! You really think he's rude if he asks? I guess that could be right... ooo - but exciting! enjoy your date (exciting is definitely a good sign that you're either over your ex or certainly almost there). Thank you so much
justagirlforever Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 I personally have no problem discussing my exes (or rather ex relationships) - if the other party is interested. But I wouldn't be the one to start dishing out the information without being asked. Most people seem not to want to know about exes (which frankly I don't understand). And personally I find it interesting - and I'm too damn nosey Rude is possibly too strong. But on a first date, I'd probably be surprised if asked - it's just generally too heavy a conversation to make light & idle chit chat out of.
sb129 Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Me too- obviously you want to know the dirt at some point, but if I was out with a guy for the first time, I wouldn't ask about his exes then and wouldn't expect him to. Imagine if he talked about his ex for ages! What a turnoff. There are loads of other things I would want to know first. Like how well hung he is....
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 I hope I didn't give the impression I want to tell him all about it? I, personally, do have a bit of a problem with discussing exes until I've been seeing a guy for a while, I think it can do more harm than good. However, I do understand how it could be an indicator of what the other person likes/dislikes in a relationship. I think I'm taking this date thingy a bit too seriously, to be honest. It's only a date...it's only a date. Now if I just keep telling myself that...
sb129 Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 Why are you still here?? Doyou not listen to anything I tell you? Get your butt down to the shops woman. Good luck! Looking forward to hearing how it goes.
justagirlforever Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 It's only a date...it's only a date. Now if I just keep telling myself that... whilst secrectly beaming with glee!
Author Ripples Posted March 23, 2007 Author Posted March 23, 2007 I'm at woooooorrrrrrrrkkkkkkkkkkkkk! They won't let me off even though I've told them how important it is <sulk> Right, lets get this straight then: Attire: Full length ball gown with whip accessories Demeanour: Over excited and thrilled to be on FIRST DATE FOR FIVE YEARS. Make sure maitre de/waiter/other diners know all about it. Converstation: Anal sex and how well he's hung. End: Puking on his shoes being careful to miss ball gown. This is going to go sooooooo well, I can just tell! :D:D
sb129 Posted March 23, 2007 Posted March 23, 2007 They will probably let you go if they know how much time you are spending on NON workrelated websites!!!!!! Don't forget the crotchless knickers. Add Ann Summers to your list
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