Mary3 Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 I sure do understand your pain! It sounds like you want to stay with him and want reassurance from others that he isn't doing anything shady. But, I can't give that to you given the fact that he is hiding his communication and flirting openly with her right in front of you. Seems shady to me, and very disrespectful. If you are going to stay, then the only advice I have is to ask him to make his phone records open to you. He can either give you the password, or show you the statements every month. Then you will know his actual contact with this woman. If he refuses to do this, then I would immediately assume something more is going on. Don't believe that you are invading his privacy. You are simply asking him to verify what he is telling you is the truth, and he has lied, so how can you really believe his word on it's own? It is up to him to restore trust...but... I think you are wasting your time with this guy. I know it's hard, but consider moving out and getting your own life in order, separate from him. We've all been where you are. And we all wish later that we had run instead of giving some guy the benefit of the doubt when he didn't deserve it. The bottom line is that he should choose you over her. No big deal there. If his communication with her bothers you, then he doesn't do it....unless he cares more about preserving THEIR relationship instead of yours. (Ouch, I know.) If you stay, make yourself some male friends and be sure to flirt openly with them in front of him. (Sorry, but I tend to be pretty confrontational, as well as aggressive in keeping things reciprocal. I don't give what I don't get in a relationship. If things don't change quickly, I get out.) There was a poster on here (Walk?) who once said after telling her boyfriend she didn't want him to do something, if he didn't change, she starting doing the same thing. When he complained about it, she simply said, "I am giving you the space to do that, and myself the same freedom to do it as well." Anyway, I'm of the mind to tell you not to waste your time on a guy who isn't emotionally available to love you. You really do deserve better! Greeeeeeeeat Post !
stace79 Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 He chose her over me and there ya go ! That just happened to me, too. Guys suck, and so do girls who won't leave their exes alone. =)
Author manders0724 Posted March 28, 2007 Author Posted March 28, 2007 thanks guys. i do appreciate the input. hence why i posted on here nicki: i do have his cell phone info. i am on his plan on his cell phone, so i have access to our account online. i can find out who he talked to, when, and for how long. and i have told him that i am going to check occasionally. and since our talk he hasnt talked to her, at all. and as long as it stays that way everything willl be great, because i wil know that he would rather be with me. I'll keep you guys posted on whats happening if anything new happens.
Author manders0724 Posted March 28, 2007 Author Posted March 28, 2007 Also, I think you may find this funny.... my bf got on this account this mornign while i was asleep. at 7:22 A.M. lol maybe after reading all of this it will make him see more clearly!
Recommended Posts