Mydish1 Posted March 15, 2007 Posted March 15, 2007 I realized i like this girl more than i thought. and i do get kinda down at the thought of not seeing her at least once a week. I havent seen her in 2 weeks. Supposedly last week we had a date meetup, she showed up an hour late, but i left because i thought she stood me up. I learned that day why she was late (she had training lessons). So i called and apologized and that i learned why she was late and that she shouldve told me. So i called again to set something up this weekend at a specific time. And she took my advice and told me she had those lessons again....I was dumb on the phone and didnt counter offer for a later time in the day (because i know what time she gets off)...And the tone of her voice kind of seemed like she wanted me to counter-offer. And the fact that out of all hte other times i call her, she returned my call the quickest this time (rather than me having to wait almos a whole day like usual). However the last time I had asked her out with a set time, she counter offered a different time in the day. So with the thought that she didnt counter-offer and often she's busy during the other days of the week, i just decided it was it and said "ok, some other time then." and hung up. Would it be desperate if i called tomorrow/Fri and leaving a voicemail saying something like, "Hey X, i know you have lessons on Sat. and I wanted to make it up to you after what happened last time. I was hoping we could meet up after your lessons end. If you can, call me back, if you cant dont worry about it." ? The thing is she's the shy/quiet type and might be more inclined to go if i asked again...
Kamille Posted March 15, 2007 Posted March 15, 2007 Honestly, it doesn't sound promising at all. Since you are interested you should definitely give it one final shot. But here, let's rephrase what you have. Hey X, i know you have lessons on Sat. and I wanted to make it up to you after what happened last time. I was hoping we could meet up after your lessons end. If you can, call me back, if you cant dont worry about it First off, avoid any kind of apologies. She missed a date by showing up an hour late and then didn't counter-offer for another date. If anyone owes apologies it is her. Second, you have nothing to make up for. Same reason as above. You are offering her one last chance for the two of you to get to know each other. You have nothing to make up for. Don't tell her to not worry about it. I think you are trying to sound casual, but it might acheive the opposite effect. So you end up with: "Hi (her name). I would really like to see you again (confidence ++). I was hoping we could meet up next saturday after your lesson ends." I'm struggling with how you should end it: you could try: "Let me know if that works for you" best of luck!
bridget_jones Posted March 15, 2007 Posted March 15, 2007 I think she made a really bad goof up by not calling you to tell you she was going to be an hour late. I would've left after 30 minutes if my date didn't show up as planned. When you called to ask her out again, and realized she had the lessons, she could have said "HOw about this time?" because in my opinion she has a little ground to cover. Honestly, inthis case, I wouldn't ask her out for this weekend. Wait until early next week and call her. if you call her over the weekend, just make it a friendly "HI, how are you, how has your week been?" call. If she suggests getting together over the weekend, great. Why not? If not, then call her early in the next week and suggest a date. or on the weekend phone call you could say 'it's been a crazy week trying to see you...I really want to, we'll have to definitely figure out a time soon to get together!" Be really friendly and enthusiastic about it.
Kamille Posted March 15, 2007 Posted March 15, 2007 Honestly, inthis case, I wouldn't ask her out for this weekend. Wait until early next week and call her. if you call her over the weekend, just make it a friendly "HI, how are you, how has your week been?" call. If she suggests getting together over the weekend, great. Why not? If not, then call her early in the next week and suggest a date. or on the weekend phone call you could say 'it's been a crazy week trying to see you...I really want to, we'll have to definitely figure out a time soon to get together!" Be really friendly and enthusiastic about it. That does sound a lot more casual! I really like it. Two thumbs up. Or should my vote only count as one?
bridget_jones Posted March 15, 2007 Posted March 15, 2007 a guy called and said something similar to me and it was really sincere so I felt good about going out with him.
Author Mydish1 Posted March 15, 2007 Author Posted March 15, 2007 good feedback. Technically she told me beforehand she would be a little late, but not indicating to me around what time she would be there. and thats what i did, i left 30 mins after. Yea she does owe me an apology. But since she's the shy/quiet type she does have trouble expresing herself and has little experience in the dating realm, so im going a little lenient on her compared to normal girls. And i know the shy types generally are more sensitive/cautious in the dating aspect. I dont think there is any or much point in making small talk over the phone, she's barely a conversationlist so it will just be awkward for her. hence it's usually me calling and the one to set up dates. Thinking back on this it is a little desperate to call again so soon. I guess ill try again next week. Guess the problem is we just started seeing each other and im afraid of her losing interest (out of sight out of mind).
Green Posted March 15, 2007 Posted March 15, 2007 well the true trick to not being desperate is to relize that you dont know her that well and that this early in the relationship losing her is no big deal
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