Guest Posted March 13, 2007 Posted March 13, 2007 Hello. Please forgive me, I am not the greatest speller. My mind is so far off track right now. Let me start off by saying i love the girl to death. Shes been the best thing for me in my life. We met at work. We hit things off pretty well. Started dateing shortly after. She was seeing someone at the time but things fell through on that relationship. We started dateing shortly after. Great times in the begining. Never spent a day apart. Still almsot havent in 3 years. I write this tonight cause im almost certin i have lost my love. We have had problems in the past. She cheeted on me once. I totaly forgave her. She knows i love the **** outta her. I feel my world crashing down on me. I would give up my life to make this girl happy. I have done nothing but stare at out picture for a full week. I havent ate more then 3 times in 12 days. I'm scared. I'm lost. I feel like i have no control. Shes in Florida atm. I wasnt in total agreemnt toward it, but i couldnt say no. I knew she needed to get away from where she was at. We live with my parents. I am not in any means happy about this situation but i am trying my best to be here for us both. She doesnt want to come back afraid i wont change. I cant deny her that. But i cant try to be the best person i can be. She wants to see me succed in life. I wanted us to. Together. She is my love my soul my heart. 3 years of my life. 3 years of the best times i have ever had. i went 7 years without anything or anyone after my HS breakup. I feel like i am going to slip into depression again. I cant afford councelling. I cant afford much of anything. How do you prove you love someone.
Confused5433 Posted March 17, 2007 Posted March 17, 2007 I feel t here is is something missing here. Did she leave because she didn't want to live with you and your parents. Did she not feel secure in your relationship? Is she going her way because she needs space? What happened to make her go away? As far as you, please take care of yourself. It's hard, that's a fact. But you come first, if not noone will take care of you. Give yourself some time to get these feelings to settle, because believe me they will. At first we all feel we are going to die without them, and our obsession with the memory of them becomes our life. It will pass trust me. When it does, then consider why she left. What happened? Maybe it wasn't just you, but her. We are in constant movement, not just externally, but internally. Maybe she felt trapped, needed space, wanted to experience other things. Who knows, and that's ok. If you truly loved her, then allow her to evolve as a person without neglecting your basic needs, life food. Believe me, if she truly loved you, over time and even relationships, she wont find what she had with you. So don't stress, don't do too much...that' turns girls off too. Just let it be.....be patient...and think instead that you lived a great experience, you loved. That's precious, if she truly is your soulmate, then she will be back. But be ready, spend time growing as a person, doing or finding what you love, meeting people, enjoying life. Don't let her come back and see you this way, not because you want to prove to her that you can live without her, but because everyone wishes to have someone healthy around us, that makes us feel more secure in a relationship. I truly hope this helps, and let me know how you're holding up. Best wishes
Living_For_Me Posted March 17, 2007 Posted March 17, 2007 I agree with Confused on this one. However i think you should approach all your future relationships this way: If they stray, stay the hell away. Why would you want to spend a second with someone who has hurt you so? I know it is easier said than done but try to use this time as an opportunity to develop yourself as a person.
taylor Posted March 17, 2007 Posted March 17, 2007 Hi Guest, I am sorry you are in pain. You came to a good place. This forum is full of warm and caring people who have gone through relationship breakups and all the emotions that you are feeling right now. The good news is that it does get easier and better with time. One comment you made that really alarmed me. You said, "I would give up my life to make this girl happy." Guest, there is no woman on the face of this earth WORTH giving up your life for. I think you spent the last 3 years trying so hard to prove your love to her and make her happy, that you lost track of who you are, what you need and what you want to make you happy. You lost your identity and with it, your self-worth. You don't need to prove your love to her. She already knows how much you love her. She knows you would do anything for her. And even with all that knowledge, she STILL walked away from you. Guest, you deserve better. You love a girl who does not appreciate you and who does not value your love. You deserve to be loved by someone who loves you just the way your are. You shouldn't have to keep proving your love to someone or bending over backwards to please someone to hold on to their love. That is not how real love works. Take some time to find out who YOU are, what makes YOU happy, what YOU need and want. Focus on you, not her, for a change. Make YOU your first priority. Take time to rebuild your confidence and regain your independence. Once you do that, you will realize you don't have to prove you are "worthy" of any girl's love. You will KNOW what you are worth and you will know what you deserve. And you will find a girl who will recognize your worth. She's the one that will deserve you.
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