LoveLace Posted March 12, 2007 Posted March 12, 2007 I'd say I hide my feelings from my roommate pretty well, but what if not as good as I think? He knew when I had feelings for him once several years ago as friends. Do guys wonder if a girl has feelings for him? Do they look for signs or is it completely over their head most of the time? Surely he's wondered about it since we've been living together...
mattie2007 Posted March 12, 2007 Posted March 12, 2007 hm... i think people unconsciously send and pick up signals about this sort of thing. we're all built to, bluntly, want to reproduce, and, as such, all of us(men and women) are experts on this particular subject. that being said, i think that men will often interpret friendliness as romantic interest. it's possible that, regardless of your feelings for him, he would have thought you were interested simply because you werenice to him. hope that helps! mattie
Author LoveLace Posted March 12, 2007 Author Posted March 12, 2007 Well in that case Mattie, when I agreed to be his roommate he must of thought I'm in love with him...
Yamaha Posted March 12, 2007 Posted March 12, 2007 I think most people know when someone likes them more than a friend. You think your hiding feelings from him but it's usually pretty easy to see the difference between friends and more. Do you want him to know and what would you do if he did?
Author LoveLace Posted March 12, 2007 Author Posted March 12, 2007 Part of me thinks he knows. Part of me thinks he may have tried pursuing me a couple times, but I'm not sure. And yes I want him to know I just don't want to be blunt about it; may not be a way around that. If he does know, I worry that he is simply taking advantage of my feelings and the fact that in the past I bent over backwards for him, years ago as friends. His kids visit us and the other night he stayed out ALL night without telling me what he was doing, and his teenager kids were there. He argues that if he has a date or something, etc, yes he might be out very late. We are in disagreement. They are old enough to be left alone for a while, and I will leave them there without thinking about it. He seems to think just because he is only a phone call away, that it's ok to leave them ALL night as well. I personally think he only does this because he knows I will be there. When I accused him of this, of course he denied. I can't get him to see what kind of position he puts me in by doing this, especially without checking with me first, at least. So what if he had this roommate idea of ours simply because, he split up with his ex, realized he can't financially live alone and with the kids too...so he remembers my old feelings and how I used to do anything in the world for him, HEY I should be HER roommate. So here he is, out on a date all night long while I AM at home with HIS kids. Not that I can't leave them, but still..and he doesn't go out often, BUT STILL....am I being completely used by someone who claims to be my friend?
Yamaha Posted March 13, 2007 Posted March 13, 2007 I personally think he only does this because he knows I will be there. You are so right. He is using your interest in him for his own interests. He knows of your feelings. If you don't like being used ( he may not be doing it intentionally but if someone allows themselves to be used it is so easy to comply ) then you need to make some decisions. Since you have liked him for so long it will be hard to leave him but I believe it may be the only way to get on with your life. You are going to have to sit him down and tell him where you stand and he is either on-board or you will move on to find a life you deserve. You deserve someone who cares for you as much as you care for him and I have my doubts if he fits your bill. You can let him know and then you will know what you must do. Good Luck
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