Guest Posted March 8, 2007 Posted March 8, 2007 okay i know u guys are all for NC, but.... how do u combine NC into getting over your best friend? coz i feel if i didnt talk to him for months on end he *may* think something is wrong! he knows i like him (i more than like him believe me, but i dont want to scare him) and i really dont know what to do. we're used to talking every other day online, but i only see him once a month because im away at school. does anyone have any suggestions? im totally lost! any advice would be really really appreciated, thankyou x x x
Yamaha Posted March 9, 2007 Posted March 9, 2007 I take it he doesn't know the extent of your feelings for him. You can't just go NC if he doesn't know how you feel because it will cause to many questions from him. If you don't want to tell him then you will just have to slowly start spending less time with him until your not as close as you were; kind of weening yourself off of him. He will wonder what is up but if you develop other interests and find some other friends you can reasonably pull it off. I am just wondering why you won't/can't tell him of your feelings? Men in this regard are not like women in that they can see a friend as a possible lover. Sometimes you just have to take a chance and do what is best for you.
Guest Posted March 9, 2007 Posted March 9, 2007 thanks for the reply yamaha he does know my feelings for him, we have talked about it once in person (face to face) and in more detail over the internet, as he did some things that upset me because i liked him, and i thought perhaps telling him would have made him realise what he was doing. He used to like me in the past, or so he says, but has got a girlfriend now and says that i shouldnt expect my feelings for him to be reciprocated, which i kinda think i still do a bit so yeah he knows i like him, quite a lot, but what he doesnt know is im madly in love with him and get upset all the time about him. i miss him so much, and seeing the comments he and his gf post to each other on myspace declaring how much they love and miss each other when they havent seen each other for a few days (i just looked) makes me really upset, as i havent seen my best friend for a month now and its killing me not seeing him, but i think he just 'misses having me around' or so he says. what i really want is to be completely over him, be able to go 'aww thats cute' when he n his gf are together in front of me, and for me to go 'hey u know what, hes not my complete life.' which i cant do right now it makes me feel permanently unhappy and i hate it
Yamaha Posted March 9, 2007 Posted March 9, 2007 Then you need to practice NC for your own happiness and well being. If he knows you like him but he has a gf then he just isn't into you. You need to accept this and look for someone who returns your feelings as we all deserve to be loved in return. Don't waste your time thinking about the what if's but accept it, be friendly to him but you can't really be his friend right now, and find another guy who thinks your great.
Guest Posted March 9, 2007 Posted March 9, 2007 lol if only it were that easy.... see the thing is, im a quiet person. like really quiet. i have lots of friends, but i like to keep myself to myself. im also...lets say *not attractive* as in i have a lot of self esteem and confidence issues, and so 'finding a guy' is proving hard. i think i pissed fate off, it hates me :\
Guest Posted March 13, 2007 Posted March 13, 2007 ok im doing it....NC. hes texted me once, i replied so he wudnt think or know i was actually ignoring him. my housemates have uninstalled msn from my computer so i cant physically talk to him! its been a week now, altho the text came a few days ago. hard times......i wanna talk to him, yet i dont....weird
Magnatolia Posted April 15, 2007 Posted April 15, 2007 Here's my advice. Ignore this ridiculous NC rule. It's offensive to the person who it's being used against, because it's like you're blaming them. 'Tell' the person that you need a break because of your feelings for him. Just let the guy know why he won't hear from you for a while. Doesn't matter if he knows how you feel.
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