jasonthorne Posted March 5, 2007 Posted March 5, 2007 Hey guys, I was wondering if I can get some advice. Me and my ex broke up 2 years ago and hadnt spoken in a year, but then I had the courage to make contact, this was 2 weeks ago. We talked about stuff and how we are both single and appearantly how we hadnt been with anyone else at all. She suggested that we be friends with benefits...i didnt like that term so I called it 'super friends' anyway, we were all set to meet but then I let her know I cant do it, i cant have casual sex. It goes against everything I am about. So I let her know this and she said she was sad and then said 'well cant we be super friends and see where it goes?' I was like no, lets just be friends and see where that goes. So she left to come see me but it got messed up and we didnt meet. I called her and she was hurt and said this was my last shot, etc, but the thing is, we were meeting as friends and shes hitting me with this was going to be us back together but now its ruined, better luck next time kind of thing. I messaged her a few days after and said I was sorry so she contacted me and we began talking again and she told me to go there and meet her. I said of course ill meet you! how about next weekend? and she was like how about now? I reluntly agreed and left but on the way, my car died and i called her and let her know. So I flaked twice. It was my mistake, but it wasnt intentional then last night, she im's me and lets me know that she will give me one more shot. I said thank you. and she said that the other week when she got home, she went out and "went home with a friend" I was shaking when she told me this. She told me recently that her opinion on sex and such had changed because of me and that she wouldnt ever do that again. It was a horrible shock. Now, I am stuck between wanting her and her wanting me and my moral fabric about to be ripped to shreds. You see, Before she met me, all she ever did was casual sex and she got an std from it and then gave me that std. I was a virgin so I was pretty sure I didnt already have it. That whole mess caused my life to colide in a bad way. So, what should I do? I am very unsure ;(
Lauriebell82 Posted March 6, 2007 Posted March 6, 2007 let me get this straight..ur ex gf slept around before she met u, contracted an STD and then gave it to u??? wow she's lucky ur even talking to her again. she keeps giving u "shots" for things that werent even ur fault. if she were an understanding and nice person she'd understand that. doesnt sound like she is that kind of person, sorry to say. cut ur losses and move on. ur putting up with her treating u like crap, and ur not even back together! imagine the field day she'll have if u ever do hook up again. oh and NEVER compromise ur morals. if ur not into casual sex, dont have it. this girl doenst even sound worth talking to, so find a girl who is worthy of u. u sound like a good guy, and u deserve a girl who will treat u right.
stillafool Posted March 6, 2007 Posted March 6, 2007 It's so hard to get over your first love. Let this one go. Wish her well and let her go. You are a jewel and there are plenty of girls just waiting to meet you.
SassyNClassy Posted March 6, 2007 Posted March 6, 2007 How can you blame her for giving you an STD. She probably didn't even know she had it and you are just as responsible for using a condom during sex as she is. Why would that upset you so much. It's a choice you made. If you're still in love with her then I'd say give it another shot...those other time's like the car breaking down are just unfortunate events. Go see her and see what happens. I think you must have changed her view on casual sex if she really hasn't been with anyone since you in the 2 years! Who knows what happened with this other guy? You guys aren't together and she said he was a friend, so It's not like she's screwing around with some stranger she just picked up. I think if you don't just see what happens with this you will regret it. Why did you guys break up in the first place?
Star Gazer Posted March 6, 2007 Posted March 6, 2007 How can you blame her for giving you an STD. She probably didn't even know she had it and you are just as responsible for using a condom during sex as she is. Why would that upset you so much. You have GOT to be kidding me!
gfto Posted March 6, 2007 Posted March 6, 2007 Hey guys, I was wondering if I can get some advice. Me and my ex broke up 2 years ago and hadnt spoken in a year, but then I had the courage to make contact, this was 2 weeks ago. Mistake. Your story is a classic example of why you should completely cut off contact with exs. Get a real girlfriend instead of chasing exs.
SassyNClassy Posted March 7, 2007 Posted March 7, 2007 You have GOT to be kidding me! What? All I'm saying is that he shouldn't put the fault squarely on her shoulders over the STD thing. He is responsible for protecting himself during sex, not just trusting whatever she says. It's very easy to not be aware of having an STD. A lot of them can be latent in someone's body and only present symptoms when passed to another person. So, what do you mean 'You've GOT to be kidding me'?
oppath Posted March 7, 2007 Posted March 7, 2007 It depends if she knew she had the STD and if she told him before they had sex!
IpAncA Posted March 7, 2007 Posted March 7, 2007 Hey guys, I was wondering if I can get some advice. Me and my ex broke up 2 years ago and hadnt spoken in a year, but then I had the courage to make contact, this was 2 weeks ago. We talked about stuff and how we are both single and appearantly how we hadnt been with anyone else at all. She suggested that we be friends with benefits...i didnt like that term so I called it 'super friends' anyway, we were all set to meet but then I let her know I cant do it, i cant have casual sex. It goes against everything I am about. So I let her know this and she said she was sad and then said 'well cant we be super friends and see where it goes?' I was like no, lets just be friends and see where that goes. So she left to come see me but it got messed up and we didnt meet. I called her and she was hurt and said this was my last shot, etc, but the thing is, we were meeting as friends and shes hitting me with this was going to be us back together but now its ruined, better luck next time kind of thing. I messaged her a few days after and said I was sorry so she contacted me and we began talking again and she told me to go there and meet her. I said of course ill meet you! how about next weekend? and she was like how about now? I reluntly agreed and left but on the way, my car died and i called her and let her know. So I flaked twice. It was my mistake, but it wasnt intentional then last night, she im's me and lets me know that she will give me one more shot. I said thank you. and she said that the other week when she got home, she went out and "went home with a friend" I was shaking when she told me this. She told me recently that her opinion on sex and such had changed because of me and that she wouldnt ever do that again. It was a horrible shock. Now, I am stuck between wanting her and her wanting me and my moral fabric about to be ripped to shreds. You see, Before she met me, all she ever did was casual sex and she got an std from it and then gave me that std. I was a virgin so I was pretty sure I didnt already have it. That whole mess caused my life to colide in a bad way. So, what should I do? I am very unsure ;( I think you should move on and leave this STD casual sex girl alone. You sound like a decent guy and you CAN do so much better then this. Even if you agreed to this, what makes you think that she isn't sleeping aorund herself. She might get something and give it to you AGAIN.
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