magichands Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Just about anything is possible if you have two mature adults in a relationship. Let's petition Tony to have this put on the LoveShack home page.
Pyro Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Let's petition Tony to have this put on the LoveShack home page. I was hoping to have a pink elephant as the new LS logo, with the letters LS tatooed on the arse.
magichands Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I was hoping to have a pink elephant as the new LS logo, with the letters LS tatooed on the arse. :lmao: That sounds like it could hurt. But I'm loyal enough that I'm not worried about the consequences.
cutegirl Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I feel that men and women should not have friends of the opposite sex when in a serious relsationship. I have no guy friends and my bf has no female friends. There will usually always be some type of sexual tension in guy-female relationships. Usually one party is romantically interested or wants to bang the other etc It's fine to have relations from a "distance" such as talking to your co-workers of the opposite sex or talking to your fellow student of the opposite sex if you are in school. I just feel you should not have really close relationships with members of the opposite sex and you definitely shouldn't be talking on the phone for hours, or going to dinner together or seeing a movie together or do extracurricular activities which do not involve your SO. It's inapropiate.
Trialbyfire Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I feel that men and women should not have friends of the opposite sex when in a serious relsationship. I have no guy friends and my bf has no female friends. There will usually always be some type of sexual tension in guy-female relationships. Usually one party is romantically interested or wants to bang the other etc It's fine to have relations from a "distance" such as talking to your co-workers of the opposite sex or talking to your fellow student of the opposite sex if you are in school. I just feel you should not have really close relationships with members of the opposite sex and you definitely shouldn't be talking on the phone for hours, or going to dinner together or seeing a movie together or do extracurricular activities which do not involve your SO. It's inapropiate. cutegirl, I have a few male friends who are like brothers to me. Some of them are married to my closest female friends. We treat each other like sibs with zero interest in each other. It honestly depends on the individuals involved. You both draw imaginary lines and stay on the other side.
Kwo-ne'-she Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I think it depends on the individuals and maturity level of the relationship. I know it is possible to have platonic friends of the opposite sex. I have male friends, and not the least bit of interest in taking it further. Nor do they.
LoveLace Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Geez, you should read my post...I found it amusing to read this thread immediately after posting! I find it quite complicated being close friends with my roommate, we are both single though..I think he caught on that I was a little jealous of his girl "friends" blowing up his phone...but suddenly that has stopped...
Author chilatte Posted March 4, 2007 Author Posted March 4, 2007 cutegirl, I have a few male friends who are like brothers to me. Some of them are married to my closest female friends. We treat each other like sibs with zero interest in each other. It honestly depends on the individuals involved. You both draw imaginary lines and stay on the other side. Ok, This time I have a Q for you. Do you go hang out with your male friends who are married without their wives? Like a one on one date but only friends. I am just trying to understand your level of friendship with them. My husbands best friend I consider like family. But, if I decided I was going to go hang out with him by myself without my husband, my husband would be pissed and I wouldn't blame him. I wouldn't do this any way even if it was ok with my husband cause I would feel that was inappropriate.
sb129 Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Just because they are my friends, thats why. It doesn't matter to me if they are involved with someone or not. They are my friends in the same why that my other friends are my friends: similar interests, fun to hang out with....... Guys are able to have friendships with the opposite sex. They just have to know how to do it properly. I agree Riddler. No. I am done questioning you. Thanks for your answers. This does satisfy my curiosity that two people in a committed relationship can have seperate friends of the opposite sex and not have any problems, jealousy, etc. Yes, they can. In my case some of my male friends have been around alot longer than my BF. And viceversa with his female friends. I feel that men and women should not have friends of the opposite sex when in a serious relsationship. I have no guy friends and my bf has no female friends. There will usually always be some type of sexual tension in guy-female relationships. Usually one party is romantically interested or wants to bang the other etc It's fine to have relations from a "distance" such as talking to your co-workers of the opposite sex or talking to your fellow student of the opposite sex if you are in school. I just feel you should not have really close relationships with members of the opposite sex and you definitely shouldn't be talking on the phone for hours, or going to dinner together or seeing a movie together or do extracurricular activities which do not involve your SO. It's inapropiate. You WOULD say that "Cute"girl. Hey get this- my BF shares a house with THREE girls. One has a BF and the others don't. How do you feel about that? He sometimes goes to a movie or out for dinner with them when I am not around- we have a LDR, and he was living in the house when we met. Nothing has happened between any of them, and I get on well with the girls. Do I lose any sleep over it?? Not a wink. I trust him totally. I think it depends on the individuals and maturity level of the relationship. I know it is possible to have platonic friends of the opposite sex. I have male friends' date=' and not the least bit of interest in taking it further. Nor do they.[/quote'] Me too. Some of them are like brothers. My best friends husband and I sometimes hang out when she is at work, and I am godmother to their son. They are like family to me. I am still friends with guys I went to school with, and we hang out when we can. And some of my male cousins are so close in age to me, we are good friends too.
pricillia Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I think that men and women can be friends, You can not cut off ties with the opposite sex just because there may be a attraction... And yes most men may befriend another woman with intentions as Sir Alpha says... but the funny thing is one should have an open mind you could possibly learn something of value from another person without trying to use them just for sex... I bet ya that... well take Riddler..(The Riddler to some) He has better healthier relationships then a man who just thinks as women as a piece of meat. He probably has longer lasting more meaningfull realationships with the women that come into his life and is a well rounded individual that people like to be around.. Giving him the opportunity to be more fullfilled instead of surface relationships. .. I think that deserves a bunny:bunny:
Author chilatte Posted March 4, 2007 Author Posted March 4, 2007 Hey, it is great to see so many replies on this. I think we all have to remember that what one person thinks is wrong is not wrong for everyone. For those of you that have relationships and maintain friendships with the opposite sex, I think it is right if it works out for you and everyone is happy. We have to respect what is right for others maybe wrong for someone else's lifestyle. As for me and my husband we just chose not to have seperate friends of the opposite sex. We just don't have the desire. I have my girl friends I hang out with and he has his guy friends and we have our mutual friends we hang out with together. This works for us and is right for us. We have been happily married for 5 wonderful years and I have to say our marriage is perfect. We are still madly in love with each other and find each other very attractive. People think all relationships have problems...well not all of them. I just want everyone to be happy in their lives & their relationships, so whatever works for you.
Kwo-ne'-she Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Hey, it is great to see so many replies on this. I think we all have to remember that what one person thinks is wrong is not wrong for everyone. Not only in this case, but every other aspect as well. For those of you that have relationships and maintain friendships with the opposite sex, I think it is right if it works out for you and everyone is happy. In my past relationships, we didn't have opposite sex friends. My exes were extremely jealous & controlling. Back then, with those men, I was jealous. Now, not so much. I have always known it was possible for me to be friends with men, and want nothing more than friendship. As I got older, I realized men can do the same.
sb129 Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Hey, it is great to see so many replies on this. I think we all have to remember that what one person thinks is wrong is not wrong for everyone. For those of you that have relationships and maintain friendships with the opposite sex, I think it is right if it works out for you and everyone is happy. We have to respect what is right for others maybe wrong for someone else's lifestyle. As for me and my husband we just chose not to have seperate friends of the opposite sex. We just don't have the desire. I have my girl friends I hang out with and he has his guy friends and we have our mutual friends we hang out with together. This works for us and is right for us. We have been happily married for 5 wonderful years and I have to say our marriage is perfect. We are still madly in love with each other and find each other very attractive. People think all relationships have problems...well not all of them. I just want everyone to be happy in their lives & their relationships, so whatever works for you. Thanks! And back to you! Glad to hear that thinks are going well for you. I am in a very happy relationship too. Good to see someone who can appreciate that there is more than one point of view, and hence more than one "right" answer.
Trialbyfire Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Ok, This time I have a Q for you. Do you go hang out with your male friends who are married without their wives? Like a one on one date but only friends. I am just trying to understand your level of friendship with them. My husbands best friend I consider like family. But, if I decided I was going to go hang out with him by myself without my husband, my husband would be pissed and I wouldn't blame him. I wouldn't do this any way even if it was ok with my husband cause I would feel that was inappropriate. I've even been a replacement date for a corporate Xmas party. The men and I have hung out together for all kinds of reasons over the years. That is the level of trust my female friends and I have with each other. They know I would rather slit my own wrists, rather than have anything remotely resembling interest in their husbands. Off-limits is off-limits.
alphamale Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I think that men and women can be friends, You can not cut off ties with the opposite sex just because there may be a attraction... yea lets see how many male friends you have once you get married. and if you can have male friends then your hubby can have female friends. That should eventually turn into a three-ring circus. And yes most men may befriend another woman with intentions as Sir Alpha says... but the funny thing is one should have an open mind you could possibly learn something of value from another person without trying to use them just for sex... everyone "uses" everyone else for something or another. you may have not figured that out yet... I bet ya that... well take Riddler..(The Riddler to some) He has better healthier relationships then a man who just thinks as women as a piece of meat. He probably has longer lasting more meaningfull realationships with the women that come into his life and is a well rounded individual that people like to be around.. Giving him the opportunity to be more fullfilled instead of surface relationships. .. I think that deserves a bunny:bunny: he's like 24 years old. he's still a kid. I used to be "friends" with girls when i was that age (18 yrs ago)
norajane Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 he's like 24 years old. he's still a kid. I used to be "friends" with girls when i was that age (18 yrs ago) That was my experience, too, at that age. I used to have guy friends, and my bf's had girls as friends, and it was never a problem. When I lived with one of my boyfriend's, we lived in the same neighborhood as his brother and a bunch of our friends. Our house became the 'hang-out' house pretty often, and people would randomly stop by for a beer or to watch The Simpsons and Seinfeld - it was never a big deal if one of us wasn't home. As I've gotten older and people have married off, there are fewer opposite sex friendships, but I think that's more a function of the married people getting caught up in their own lives, and not really doing social things unless they do it as a couple. Once the kids arrive, you hardly see them at all.
alphamale Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 As I've gotten older and people have married off, there are fewer opposite sex friendships, but I think that's more a function of the married people getting caught up in their own lives, and not really doing social things unless they do it as a couple. Once the kids arrive, you hardly see them at all. its also because single people of the opposite sex are seen as a threat to the marriage. usually you'll see married couples hanging out together cause its percieved as more "safe". close male-female friendships almost always cause trouble eventually....but the naive youngin's haven't had time to figure it out yet. But they will...
magichands Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 everyone "uses" everyone else for something or another. you may have not figured that out yet... Thank heavens experience doesn't make you cynical. Senility may still be a factor. Something to think about. Less and less, as it turns out.
norajane Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 its also because single people of the opposite sex are seen as a threat to the marriage. usually you'll see married couples hanging out together cause its percieved as more "safe". close male-female friendships almost always cause trouble eventually....but the naive youngin's haven't had time to figure it out yet. But they will... I tend to agree, though I wouldn't have agreed back then. But, yes, I've seen the friendships cause trouble often enough - even it's only unfounded jealousy, it does cause problems.
magichands Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 When I lived with one of my boyfriend's, I wish I could ban people for misuse of the possessive. Welcome back.
norajane Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I wish I could ban people for misuse of the possessive. Welcome back. Damn - and I usually take such care to avoid misplaced possessives. I'm slipping.
Pyro Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I feel that men and women should not have friends of the opposite sex when in a serious relsationship. I have no guy friends and my bf has no female friends. There will usually always be some type of sexual tension in guy-female relationships. Usually one party is romantically interested or wants to bang the other etc How do you know that will ALWAYS be the case for everyone? Its different for everyone, so don't assume that we all have sexual tensions towards our friends of the opposite sex.
Pyro Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I think that men and women can be friends, You can not cut off ties with the opposite sex just because there may be a attraction... And yes most men may befriend another woman with intentions as Sir Alpha says... but the funny thing is one should have an open mind you could possibly learn something of value from another person without trying to use them just for sex... I bet ya that... well take Riddler..(The Riddler to some) He has better healthier relationships then a man who just thinks as women as a piece of meat. He probably has longer lasting more meaningfull realationships with the women that come into his life and is a well rounded individual that people like to be around.. Giving him the opportunity to be more fullfilled instead of surface relationships. .. I think that deserves a bunny:bunny: Thanks. I have had some bad relationships in the past, but I have learned from them and I feel that I have improved greatly from them. Like I mentioned before, having female friends have helped me with trying to understand women and it has helped me out greatly. Unlike some, I can look at women in more ways then just a "piece of meat."
pricillia Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 So in general people use friends to get what they want from that person and always expect something in return to keep the friendship going. No one ever does something nice for someone (sexually unrelated) just because? So who ever I feel comfortable with (male speaking) enought to have a conversation with on a general basis is just someone that I want to bed? Ha I don't think so... From the male perspective I could see this to be the case, but at the same time there are men and women who can remain friends without expecting anything.
Pyro Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 As I've gotten older and people have married off, there are fewer opposite sex friendships, but I think that's more a function of the married people getting caught up in their own lives, and not really doing social things unless they do it as a couple. Once the kids arrive, you hardly see them at all. Good point NJ. I am sure that once all of us get married and/or start a family or we take off with our careers, we will see less of each other. Always looking at the half empty glass Alpha, as usual. I know that this doesn't imply to everyone because not everyone is capable of this, or is not mature/too-close minded for it, but people are capable of having friendships with the opposite sex. Anyone who doesn't think that it is possible has probably been burned in the past by it, or they just view the opposite sex as just sex and nothing else. Basically they don't give two sh*ts about them unless they know that they are going to get some from them.
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