what would you do?

[lost and confused]

well my story is a bit compilcated so please bare with me.

i met this guy a year ago. 1 month into our relationship he tells me he had herpes since he was 19 years old now 26 and that he didnt know how to tell me. well i told him i will look beyond it and of course i tried my best dealing with it. i really liked him felt i was in love. i went to the doctor around a month later and got tested. the test came out positive. i now had herpes. i was crushed i didnt know what to do. im part to blame because even though we were having protected sex. i should have known this would happen. he supported me all the way and helped me get though the hard times. 3 months into the relationship he sends me a text msg by accident. it was really for his "ex gf" who lived overseas. turns out they werent broken up. well we ended up fighting and he begged me back so wearing my heart on my sleeve i give him another chance. he promised to cut all ties with her blah blah blah. one of the reasons why i stayed with him was because i was afraid to live with this disease and not be able to be with anyone else. i thought who would want to be with me now?

 

anyways 1 year later our relationship is stronger and very serious we wanted to get married and were looking for apartments together.

 

im now 22 years old and he is 26.

 

young in love and i have my career on the right track. one problem be does'nt. my parents advise me that he is not the right one for me. he does'nt have anything going for him yet. he starts school this summer but he wants to be a doctor. he wont be done for a long time.

 

i argue with my whole family and proclaim my love for him. they dont really care. they believe i deserve better than him. they mentioned a few guys friends i have who show alot of interest in me, who are rich, cute and who would love to spend their lives with me. i dont care about all of that true love is beyond that i tell them.

 

after many nights arguing with them. i find out my bf is cheating on me. he is still talking to his "ex gf". i find out he has another email account and i tried his old password and boom im in and he had told her about me. she was ok with talking to him. it mentioned that she still calls him and he told her of troubles we were having in our relationship. i was crushed after everything, after fighting with my family he was still in contact with her. i found one email that broke up with her and he told her to stya in contact through email but that was only a 2 weeks before i found all this out. i

 

i confronted him he denied it until i showed him and then he came out with the truth. we talked all night on the phone and of course me crying and him apologizing. he swore on his life and everything that meant anything to him that she is nothing he was just having a hard time letting go coz he was with her for 4 years. i broke up with him i just could not handle the pain. the next day he called and cried to me he wanted me back and swore never to even touch another computer. after a long conversation i agreed to take him back but something inside of me is not that same. i cant trust him. now the idea of those rich,cute guys is in my head. even though i notice a change in him i dont feel i can trust him. he even quit his band and is not going out anymore. he stills me he wants to focus on us now and not hurt me anymore. but i think its too late.

 

i dont know what to do im scared.i based my life on him. i have a disease that will probably end any new relationship i try to start. should i just give him another chance. should i see how serious he wants to be. what would you do?

 

PLEASE HELP ME I NEED AS MUCH AS I CAN GET PLEASEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!