samsungxoxo Posted March 3, 2007 Posted March 3, 2007 Well not that I would really do it (I dunno, unless the spark runs out, if it does it's his fault, he's not doing anything to impress me anymore) but in my imagination I picture another fish coming out of the ocean and me going for it, while I'm dragging my b/f for a little while before dumping him. It's like in my imagination I would like to know what exactly feels like to be the one deceiving, what does it feels like in that moment. Is it normal to imagine this?
EnigmasMuse Posted March 3, 2007 Posted March 3, 2007 if it does it's his fault, he's not doing anything to impress me anymore) are you placing ALL the blame on him not impressing you anymore? And even if he is not doing anything for you, then you might want to just move on. I would think if you could imagine it, you could do it.
agnf666 Posted March 3, 2007 Posted March 3, 2007 Sounds like a lack of trust somewhere.Also, sounds like your mind wants you to find another person because your unhappy. If you see yourself wanting to cheat then odds are that it might happen. I would say if you are unhappy then you need to talk to your boyfriend.
JackJack Posted March 3, 2007 Posted March 3, 2007 Just dump him right now and spare him the pain. I agree. You say he is not doing anything anymore to impress you, it could be that he feels you are not doing anything to impress him either, so he figures why bother?
Salicious Crumb Posted March 3, 2007 Posted March 3, 2007 Well not that I would really do it (I dunno, unless the spark runs out, if it does it's his fault, he's not doing anything to impress me anymore) but in my imagination I picture another fish coming out of the ocean and me going for it, while I'm dragging my b/f for a little while before dumping him. It's like in my imagination I would like to know what exactly feels like to be the one deceiving, what does it feels like in that moment. Is it normal to imagine this? Only if you have been betrayed. I think about it after finding out about my wife...not thinking about actually doing it...but thinking about what she would do if I were to give her a taste of her own medicine. But if your bf hasn't betrayed you...then no...its not normal, and is probably a sign that you shouldn't be with him.
Trialbyfire Posted March 3, 2007 Posted March 3, 2007 Temptation happens in life all the time. It's up to you to take it or not. Best to review your relationship and decide if you want in or out and then take the necessary actions to make a go of what you want. To remain in a relationship where you're not that into him isn't the most healthy or respectful way to live. Sometimes people cheat because they're not happy in a relationship. Don't you feel that you owe it to both of you to focus on the real reason(s) why you're dissatisfied and do something about them?
Author samsungxoxo Posted March 4, 2007 Author Posted March 4, 2007 Nevermind, what on earth was I thinking, there's still no excuse. As to the betraying part, NO he has not cheated, not that I know of and if he did he knows very well it would be a deal-breaker to me immediately.
whichwayisup Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Well not that I would really do it (I dunno, unless the spark runs out, if it does it's his fault, he's not doing anything to impress me anymore) but in my imagination I picture another fish coming out of the ocean and me going for it, while I'm dragging my b/f for a little while before dumping him. It's like in my imagination I would like to know what exactly feels like to be the one deceiving, what does it feels like in that moment. Is it normal to imagine this? Why would it be HIS fault if the spark runs out? And if it ever got to that point and you felt your needs weren't being met, he wasn't putting in that effort, why cheat? Why not just talk to him and tell him how you feel? To choose to cheat on someone when you're unhappy isn't solving the problem. Don't know why you'd wanna drag him through the mud, let him experience pain just because you felt like doing that to him. I know you say these are just thoughts, but some of your other posts kind of scream out. And I know you don't like talking to a therapist Ailec, but I really think one would help you sort out your thoughts and other stuff going on inside you. Just trying to open your eyes abit, so you'll atleast think about it.
pricillia Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 I don't think that she should dump him before trying to talk to her BF about the problem. Relationships do take two and maybe you should ignite the spark again I am curious to know what would you like him to do for your to get you where you used to be? Or what did he used to do, say to peak your interest?
elijahBailey Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Yeah I've imagined myself cheating too. But it's fantasy, that's all. So I think it's "normal" if you ask me. But if you start thinking about it too much, it may happen. Be careful what you wish for, cuz you might just get it.
sb129 Posted March 4, 2007 Posted March 4, 2007 Actually, the OP said she was "IMAGING" herself cheating.... You been taking pictures?
Author samsungxoxo Posted March 7, 2007 Author Posted March 7, 2007 Thanx for your replies, it's all been talked out. I figure I would start using the "talking it all straight forward" approach instand of being quiet and not stating how I feel. You're all right, why cheat, that's the cowards' way out. Geez now I feel like a kinda terrible person for even thinking about it (fantasy only but still, it wasn't even suppost to be in my thoughts).
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