guin_girl Posted March 2, 2007 Posted March 2, 2007 So today is the day we will have the face to face exchange... after the NC for a month and his displeasure of not acknowledging his existence at the game this week... we are going to have our, what I have to assume to be, the final showdown. I have two of his "precious" movies that he's been obsessed over (too bad I didn't rate higher that these stupid movies) that he's dying to get back. I only had a stupid penguin coozie at his place, but if he's going to make a big deal out of two movies that he can find for .99 since they are on VHS, I can make him schlep crap too. We are meeting at a sports bar across from the arena prior to the game that we both have season tickets to (well I have season tickets in my name, he's got access to a set but not as good seats as mine). This is a bar that we (and several hundred others) go to prior to every game, so there will be subsequent run ins... so this meeting will set the precedence on how we will interact or avoid for the rest of the season. I'm pretty nervous... not about seeing him, I'm actually ok with my seeing him, but more about how he will be with me. The pompous voice mail that he left after my "snub" was out of line and I'm sure he was drunk when he called.... well today is his birthday, he was going to be my seatmate as my b'day treat to him... grrrrr.... so we all know he's going to be pretty drunk again today... so Lord only knows how he's going to be tonight... One of his sales reps is taking him, so hopefully he will be more in control since it's a work connection.... I feel for my coworker who's going with me, he's going to have to be my rock.... my sounding board... So if you all could think about me and send me good vibes at 6:00 EST, maybe all of our energy will make this go smoothly for all...
Motor35 Posted March 2, 2007 Posted March 2, 2007 GIRL! I think this is a mistake. Can you send someone else to give him his movies? You've been doing so well - I think this might set you back a bit. Please send someone else in your place. Pleeeeease.
Author guin_girl Posted March 2, 2007 Author Posted March 2, 2007 I won't be by myself. And I'm going to have to get used to seeing him since we both have season tickets and I'm not going to alter my lifestyle and let him keep doing the same things that I have always done too. He's not going to win... he didn't want me, fine... but he's not going to take away my pleasures too!! We both did the same activities for the past several years without ever having met each other. It was actually scary when comparing our pasts that we did the same things and hung out at the same places for years and never met. Now it's just something I need to get to used to.
Trialbyfire Posted March 2, 2007 Posted March 2, 2007 You're a gutsy lady guin_girl. Good luck with this and don't be afraid to cry a little when you get home. Regardless of how it turns out, it will be a stressful evening.
Author guin_girl Posted March 2, 2007 Author Posted March 2, 2007 You're a gutsy lady guin_girl. Good luck with this and don't be afraid to cry a little when you get home. Regardless of how it turns out, it will be a stressful evening. Thanks... I have to do this for myself. Even though he took the chicken's way out of this relationship, I'm not going to succumb to his level. I will be the adult, the bigger person... And then come back on here tonight and throw a tantrum At least I'm going to do this before the sporting event, any aggression or emotion I can expend at the game...
oppath Posted March 2, 2007 Posted March 2, 2007 Best of luck. Try to keep the interaction brief. If he apologizes, briefly listen to him. Be the big person. Tell him you accept it, though you really hurt, and you are not ready to be friends if that is what he wants. Do acknowledge him though. It will be empowering for you. And don't be afraid to cut him short if he wants to talk longer or about things you don't wish to discuss.
Author guin_girl Posted March 2, 2007 Author Posted March 2, 2007 Best of luck. Try to keep the interaction brief. If he apologizes, briefly listen to him. Be the big person. Tell him you accept it, though you really hurt, and you are not ready to be friends if that is what he wants. Do acknowledge him though. It will be empowering for you. And don't be afraid to cut him short if he wants to talk longer or about things you don't wish to discuss. I'm hoping because we both are there with a buddy, we won't have the ability to start anything but a superficial conversation... That was another reason I avoided any contact at the game this week... he was all alone, and I didn't want to be on my own with him without my backup... an escape plan... Although I'm not sure it would even cross his mind to explain his disappearing act, let alone have any deep talk; from his demeanor on the phone, he must feel that it is completely acceptable to just exit someone's life without saying anything. oh well... his loss, not mine... I'm still feeling ok... not as nervous as I thought I would be... we shall see...
oppath Posted March 2, 2007 Posted March 2, 2007 Sounds like a good plan. Keep it brief and superficial and if he wants to talk more, only discuss what you are comfortable. Don't let him open the wound more than it already will.
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