hotgurl Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 So I was talking with my girlfriend at work and realised most woman have the same complaints about thier husbands. And a lot of it is similar to the typical bumbleing sitcom husband. 1.) chore division. (this is a big one I hear across the board) in the movie the breakup the GF said to the BF I want you to want to do the dishes. His response was why the hell would I want to do the dishes. I think her point was she wanted him to want to do the dishes because he recongnized that she put all this effort into dinner and to help her out and show his appreciation he should do the dishes 2.) not romantic enough, or the romance has slacked off over the years. Again I think this has to do with showing appreciation for your partner and women still liked to be wooed, even if they have been in a relationship for years. it's nice and makes a person feel special. 3.) child care is a big one for people with kids. again it's a division of labor thing. 4.) no making the gf a priority in thier life. ie. friends, superbowl, hobbies are more important than taking the time to listen to your wife or spend some one on one tiem together. for men the biggest one I hear is lack of sex. The women don't have the same passion they once did. I was once in a relationship where I virtually stopped having sex with my partner. I realized it was because of my resentment towards him for taking me for granted and treating my like crap. he never realized his treatment of me directly correlated to the amount of sex I gave him. Now these are sweeping generalizations I realize. And not true for every relationship. Plus soemtime when you get a group of woman together they can complain about thier So and they feed on each other. I also realized that sometimes your husband? BF can show thier love etc.. in different ways than you expect and so you can overlook it. Also sometimes when I am mad at my BF for taking me for granted I stop and think am I taking him for granted and most times the answer is yes. it is so easy to get caught up in one's own needs & resesntment that you don't look at your own actions. Maybe he doesn't do the dishes or clean but he picks my daughter up from school every day, buys her schools supplies, helps with her homework etc.... There is no real point to this thread just something that occured to me. My BF says woman love thier men to be stupid and bumbleing on TV. he hates it. I just wonder if we are all so similar afterall.
tommyr Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 I would generally agree with all of your generalized complaints against husbands. Not saying its all TRUE, just that these seem to be very common perceptions. for men the biggest one I hear is lack of sex. The women don't have the same passion they once did. If I may add a related complaint: the wife abandons all pre-marital efforts towards sex appeal (vibe, dress, appearance, etc) he never realized his treatment of me directly correlated to the amount of sex I gave him. The man's side of this: "she never realized the lack of sex directly correlated to my hesitation for chores/childcare/romanticism" Hotgurl, I believe these issues are the key to a successful relationship. It takes hard work and understanding on BOTH parts to bring a daily dose of willingness into the relationship.
Author hotgurl Posted February 28, 2007 Author Posted February 28, 2007 I agree it just stuck me how may woman have the same complaint. It seems chores are a huge one. For me I have tried to think of my actions towards him more than his actions towards me. Am I being caring enough. Do I take him for granted. etc.... Also recognizing that my expectation may be the root of some negative feeling. I have certain thing I want him to do for me ie the dishes ect.. But he does other things that show his love for me. ex. making me coffee in the am and bringing me the first cup, warming up my car, helping me with my daughter, getting me a glass of wine in the evenings. So it is more about learning and appreciating his signs of love instead of focusing on what I want his signs of love to be. sorry I feel this is somewhat of a convoluted answer.
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