sexywhisper Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 I have a boyfriend and everytime there is a situation (it can be simple or not simple) my boyfriend does NOT know how to hold his composure. We can talk about something and then he'll lash out and start to yell, even when the situation doesnt call for it. Example: I have a job that I work for 10 hours a day. I come home exhausted.... So I asked him if he could help me once in a while cook. I told him that he can heat up hot dogs or hamburgers. He can even make grilled cheese sandwiches. When I cook, I make big meals such as lasagna; spanish food; etc............. I don't care much what he makes, just something that would help me out. He started to yell and told me that he's not going to cook. He said if he cooks, that he's going to cook for himself only and no one else. He seems to be very selfish. I don't know what else to do. I'm really stressed out. Then when conversation is over, he starts to make comments to try to agitate me or bother me, so i can respond. He'll say things like " women these days get on my nerves, etc etc etc..........." Then he see's im on the computer doing some work, and he'll say things like "hurry up i need to get on the computer etc etc etc. " He'll keep on til I explode or say something. Then he'll lay there on the bed and smile like he enjoys this. someone please give me some advice.
murphomatic Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 Sounds like he's not too interested in participating in the relationship on an adult level. More along the lines of "He'll be the child, if you take care of him like the Mommy", and then he revels in the fact that he can spin you up against the ceiling, and you can't "punish" him for it....so he gets the best of both worlds - the Mommy to take care of him with none of the disciplinary side-effects. I can see this being the case - especially if he can't keep his composure and resorts to screaming at people when it's uncalled for. I'd say that this guy has a lot to learn before he'll be capable of maintaining a serious relationship where both participants contribute for the good of the whole. My gal works 12 hour shifts. 95+% of the time, I make sure the dishes are done, the kitchen is cleaned, and dinner is (at least) planned before she walks in the door.
laRubiaBonita Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 someone please give me some advice. is this guy an only child? he sounds like most of the only-child-boyfriends in the past. how long have you two been together? has he always been this self centered or is it a newer thing? is he a mama's boy? does he yell at you? is he allowed to tell you what you are not doing right (aka- "his way"), but you are not allowed to say anything critical to him?
lovelorcet Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 someone please give me some advice. Kick his ass to the curb...
norajane Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 He sounds immature, controlling, selfish, and verbally abusive. All men are not like this, so please don't think you have to put up with him. Dump him now and free yourself of this jerk. There will be someone else who will be more than willing to be a partner to you, rather than an immature child.
Star Gazer Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 is this guy an only child? he sounds like most of the only-child-boyfriends in the past. I'm an only child, and I would never ever ever behave like that. I've dated only-children as well, and they've never behaved like this...except at, well, maybe 5 years old. Advice? Lose this guy, fast.
Topper Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 Star gazer You were dating a 5 year old? Oh and yeah dump the guy.
Salicious Crumb Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 someone please give me some advice. Well ya...geez...he is damn selfish. I never mind if my wife asks me to cook...not only do I like to, that is one way to make sure I have a say as to what goes into my body. When she cooks, its all this fattening pasta and fried crap. I have a washboard to maintain...so when she asks me to cook...I happily oblige. As for the rest of the stuff you mentioned, yah...he is a real piece of work. As for advice...well, its up to you...but since this is just your boyfriend, you may want to consider moving on. That is unless you really love him, and you think he really loves you....but it doesn't sound like he does too awful much. I'd talk to him about it...and if he copes a chauvanistic attitude and sh!its on your concerns and feelings...then I'd say kick his lazy ass out.
LuminousZ Posted February 28, 2007 Posted February 28, 2007 He sounds immature, controlling, selfish, and verbally abusive. All men are not like this, so please don't think you have to put up with him. Dump him now and free yourself of this jerk. There will be someone else who will be more than willing to be a partner to you, rather than an immature child. Norajane is right on.., I enjoy cooking for my woman - last night she enjoyed linguini + clam sauce. This morning - eggs over easy for breakfast... tonight she will feast on some steak I've been marinating overnight.., with a side of sweet potato + steamed broccoli. Find a guy who will appreciate you after a long day at work..,
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