amberwboone Posted February 24, 2007 Posted February 24, 2007 I have posted on here I have been broke up with my ex for the One Month one week! I still talk to him although I shouldn't and I am the one that always calls him. After my hour of crying,why's,begging he tells me he just wants time to think about things time to be alone. We were together for 4 years he sounds like he doesn't even miss me. I don't understand how it is so easy for him. Does anyone know? I ask him how much time he wants and says he don't know. Sometimes he says all he wanted was a break and then there are times he says that he just wanted to be alone he don't understand that there is a difference. So here I am trying to figure him out. Someone who I thought I new inside out out. I guess I was wrong. Has anyone ever had a person tell them that wanted some times apart and they come back? I would be interested in hereing someones story:laugh: thanks
nittygritty Posted February 25, 2007 Posted February 25, 2007 Amber, I have read some of your other posts and hard as it may be your going to have to actually let him miss you in order for there to be a chance of him coming back for good. It sounds like your trying to guilt him into coming back. Which may work for a little while but it will only be a matter of time before he either leaves again or possibly starts cheating. Believe me, You don't want somebody who doesn't want to be with you. Take back your self esteem. Get mad. Respect his wishes for time apart, time to think. He will have more respect for you if you take this time to really think about whether or not you really want to be with him anymore if this is going to be how he treats you. You can fall to pieces all you want when he and more importantly your daughter is not around. She needs her momma to teach her how to be strong and that your going to make the best of the situation whether Mom and Dad stay together or not. She will only do as well as you do with the separation. In your other posts you said your kissing him and that your calling him and crying and begging him. That your afraid that if you stop he will forget you. Think about the memories of you your leaving him with after each one of these encounters. Regardless of what he says, you really have no way of knowing whether or not there is another woman involved in his need for "time to think" and you need to realize that whether its "someone" or "something" you are in a competition and your pushing him further away. Also, think about what your going to win if he does come back right now. It doesn't sound like he is offering you very much. You can do better. You deserve better. You need to know that and believe it. He will see you through a new set of eyes if he can see that you are doing just fine without him and your no longer sitting at home waiting for him to decide whether or not he wants to be with you. Don't let him put all of his parental responsibilities on you while he is trying to figure out what he wants. He needs to be paying you child support and exercising visitation (at his place) and if he's not, you need to hire a lawyer or seek assistance to make your transition into single parenting as easy as possible. I know your scared about the possibility of raising your daughter without him being around all of the time to help. But you can do this. You already are. Take Care
Author amberwboone Posted February 25, 2007 Author Posted February 25, 2007 I try so hard to walk away with the little dignity that I have left. Some days it is so easy other days not so much. I am focused on my baby and I try so hard to not think him, or us, or our past but it is hard. I really in my heart believe there is someone else although he denies it and it just makes him mad that I accuse him. I can't wait tell I can wake up in the morning and just be happy again. I have turned to medical help for depression and all that fun stuff. I think starting today there is going to be a new me. It is going to be hard but I am going to let him go. Move on with my life. Be fun again with my kids. Thanks for the advice amber
nittygritty Posted February 26, 2007 Posted February 26, 2007 You already sound like your doing much better. Your getting stronger. Just keep focusing on what you need to do to take care of you and your kids. Your going to realize soon that it is much easier to deal with his uncertainty by having the least amount of contact with him as possible. Even if there is another woman you know what kind of a guy she would be getting. A cheater for starters. Don't try to win a booby prize.
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