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No wonder I keep getting dumped right before Valentine's Day!


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Posted

I didn't realize things were over already Jen_Jen?

 

I agree, instead of disappointing, guys realize it is easier to walk away before Valentine's Day. Keep the faith, the right one is out there and then the holiday won't be so dreadful! At least I keep telling myself that...

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Posted

Yup.

 

This part of the article said it best:

"I think what it speaks to is that romance has its practical and even Machiavellian and manipulative nature," said Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington who studies relationships. "People look out for their own welfare, and they'll do things that make it easier for them."

Posted

"I think what it speaks to is that romance has its practical and even Machiavellian and manipulative nature," said Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington who studies relationships. "

 

 

I had her as a professor when I went to the UW. She's a wise, wise woman.

 

I really want a date for V-day myself, doesn't look like it's going to happen though.

Posted

This opened my eyes..... I have ended just about all relationships in JAN....

wonder how this one will go...... only a few days left.

 

a4a

Posted

 

Interesting article Jen thanks for sharing..

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Posted

Wow....I had a candidate I was seeing for about a month and now I haven't heard from him for a couple of days and havent seen him in about 2 weeks....which is odd....could it be cause of V-day?

Hmmmm....I mean I just started seeing another applicant but, we will c...a lot of guys do avoid the whole V-day thing. I'm not a big V-day person so I don't blame them. Well not since my ex...I guess.

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Posted

I was dumped last January. I don't date anymore so now I don't have to worry about the January breakups.:D

Posted

Wow, sorry Jen-Jen, that sucks. I have been following your postings and think you are probably better off. You seem like a great gal and he seemed to take advantage of that.

 

I have been dating a guy for 2-1/2 months now and I told him that I did not want to be around just for convenience (if nothing else was happening that weekend) and that I wanted more. He said he wanted time to think about it and that was over a week ago. I don't expect that I will hear from him again but if I do surely after V-day.

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Posted
Wow, sorry Jen-Jen, that sucks. I have been following your postings and think you are probably better off. You seem like a great gal and he seemed to take advantage of that.

 

I have been dating a guy for 2-1/2 months now and I told him that I did not want to be around just for convenience (if nothing else was happening that weekend) and that I wanted more. He said he wanted time to think about it and that was over a week ago. I don't expect that I will hear from him again but if I do surely after V-day.

 

Thanks KP1. I'm having a very difficult time with all of this. I was already battling depression and illness, so I just don't have the strength to deal with this kind of devastation, and my support system is practically non-existent.

 

I'm sorry you're dating Mr. Ambivilent. All these self-help books I have lying around here (I could open my own bookstore for rejectees) talk about Mr. Ambivilent and Mr. Commitmentphobic. They are basically one in the same. They usually start off as Mr. I'm-so-nuts-about-you. Mr. Hot-and-cold is a close relative.

 

Gosh, I hope I'm wrong. I really hope he's not stringing you along. I hope you have the happy, wonderful Valentine's Day that you deserve.

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Posted
I was dumped last January. I don't date anymore so now I don't have to worry about the January breakups.:D

kittenchick, I say we (all the caring, loving, sensitive-hearted women who were treated cruelly by men) should band together and form an army. Then we'll storm the streets together and take out all the abusive men from our past and present. Rid the world of all the a**h***s. We should do this every Valentine's Day.

Posted

see this is why men freak out about Vday.. a lot of women put greater emphasis on this "holiday." that it's supposed to be all special and romantic and what not... all for one day!

 

personally, i don't care too much about Valentine's. i know i get the same type of loving all of 364 days... besides, it's too commercialized (like Christmas).

Posted

Thanks for the optimistic attitude, but I am not feeling super optimistic about things. After so many idiots, you begin to lose hope. I understand your side of things more than you realize. I am experiencing a bunch of changes in my life now (buying my first home, changing jobs, starting my own company) that not having someone there to support me leaves me in a very depressed state also. I know I can do it alone, I just don't want to.

 

I am down with protesting Valentine's Day, even though I have dated, I haven't had a Valentine's date in 8 years. Let's run the streets ladies! :cool:

Posted

Valentine's day is on a tuesday. YUK! Have to go to work. i had some nice plans for sending cards though. International break up month... well that gives us singles more work :)

 

I am going to send one girl an anonymous card with a dorky sentence on it (About having a thousand roses but her being the pretiest one of all) The sentence is so corny/cheesy but we always say it to each other because her little brother got that sentence in a text message on his phone from his girlfriend.

 

Two other girls will get an anonymous card from me. But I'm going to deliver them myself ;)

 

Hope I don't get to much anonymous cards from ex students or those girls to whom I rather not speak that got my adress from friends. ;)

Posted

Maybe I am the only girl who doesn't put any special emphasis on V-day. I don't feel down if I don't have a date and if I do I don't view it as something holy. For people who are dating most of the time you don't actually *love* the person who you are spending it with anyway.

Posted

jen_jen, I registered with the Chicago Trib as a member and I still can't seem to access that article... do you think you could just cut and paste it here? I'm dying to read it!

 

Thanks,

-latefragment

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Posted

I think copyright and LS rules prevent me from posting the text on a public forum, so I will send it to you in a private message.

Posted
Maybe I am the only girl who doesn't put any special emphasis on V-day.

 

nope. there are at least 2 of us. :)

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Posted

Yeah - this is the month my relationship ended too. (Two weeks ago.)

 

He was out of town over Christmas and was going to give me my Christmas present after his return. He has been back for three weeks and never did give the gift to me.... wonder what it was? :( Maybe he never did get me one. He he!

 

So obviously - no Valentine's gifty/date either then......

 

As for the day itself - then there were three.

 

I truly do think Valentine's Day is (highly) over rated and commercialized.

 

The thoughts of this particular day this year does get me down somewhat though - cause it just illustrates that I am alone - again.

 

Scheduled myself to work both my jobs that day anyway. Might as well be busy and making some money... and then I can take myself out for dinner and buy my own dam^ flowers..... :cool:

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Posted
He was out of town over Christmas and was going to give me my Christmas present after his return. He has been back for three weeks and never did give the gift to me.... wonder what it was? :( Maybe he never did get me one. He he!

 

OMG! What is it with guys who promise gifts that never materialize?!?!! My ex (who was also out of town) had given me a card with some impersonal gift cards and told me that he had a gift that was too large to slip through the door. Well, three weeks went by and I never saw this "mystery gift"...and then he dumped me last Saturday.

 

And the guy before that said he went to some german festival during the holidays and made a point to tell me that he picked up something special for me and I'd have to wait for Christmas to get it. Then Christmas came and no gift from a german mart. I asked him a week later about it and he said he had no idea what I was talking about. I thought I was going nuts. Three months later he dumped me. And when we had our Valentine's day that February he didn't even get me an effing card. All I wanted was a card. Didn't care about flowers or a gift or a fancy dinner (which I didn't get either)...all I wanted was a heartfelt card.

 

Men suck.

Posted
OMG! What is it with guys who promise gifts that never materialize?!?!! My ex (who was also out of town) had given me a card with some impersonal gift cards and told me that he had a gift that was too large to slip through the door. Well, three weeks went by and I never saw this "mystery gift"...and then he dumped me last Saturday......

 

Nice.......not.

 

Maybe they were the same guy :sick: .

 

(btw - in honour of the day coming up - I have changed my avatar:eek: :rolleyes:

Posted

On Valentine's Day of 2004, I dumped the best boyfriend I have ever had, and likely will ever have. I have been kicking myself in the ass ever since. What was I thinking???

 

Ian, if you ever come across this: I loved you then, I love you now and I will love you always. The flawed like me are doomed to crush everything in their paths, even the most priceless things... but I know one day I'll find a way. Until then, I'll be working to overcome my nature - if not for you, then in homage to you.

  • 2 weeks later...
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Posted

Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow. Hillary Swank and her husband. Etc... This proves the January theory.

Posted

On an unrelated topic, thank you Jen Jen for bringing back the cartoon cutie. She's much better to look at than the cats.

Posted

jen, thanks for sending me the article, i sent you a PM!

by the way, i frigging hate v-day, AARRGH. the only fun thing about it is seeing the funny valentine's day cards.

 

did you all see the Star Wars one, with a picture of darth vader on it, and it says:

 

"I am your .....

 

 

....... VALENTINE!!!!!"

 

LOL!

 

That pretty much describes who would have been my valentine. LOL

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