How can u tell if a a guy is interested?I need to rebound fast, but hes a keeper!HELP

[totallyconfused]

So i am rebounding bad, just got out of a 4 year relationship 1 week ago and am trying horribly to forget about him. so now i found myself back in the dating pool and frankly...i dont know where to start!

 

Soooo I've been shamelessly flirting with this guy at work that. i think he would be better than just a rebound. i am genuinely interested in his personality. we get along really great. his looks are different from what i usually like, but the personality is really cool, so smoooooth. so far i've went out to lunch with him twice, but each time i've asked. I always pay my own way too. i've also told him a little bit about my break up and how i was cheated on and how messed up it was, but i wasnt emotional about it. just basically saying how messed up its been for the first time in my life. so what i would like to know is how can i tell if he likes me? he's told me he enjoys being single, doesnt avoid girls, but that its an easy life w/o girls. he's very mature and just seems like he's got his sh*it together ya kno?

 

well today's 2nd lunch, I mentioned earlier. so ugh bad news, I mentioned something about me being 5'1" so it would be alot if someone weighed somethin over 115 - and he was like "oh the girl i've been seeing is about the height and idk how much she weighs". i was crushed but right away i replied back "yeah, u def. dont ask a girl how much she weighs" laughing. damn he had to slip that one in there.

 

but then right after that, he said something like he's never met a girl like me and that i'm defenitly different b/c i am so honest. honest with how i talk and just act. and he was like thats a good different. so what the heck does that mean? his body language is there, he acts like he's interested, BUT then he just HAD to drop that one line in. it was like a semi-bomb to me. no wonder he hasnt been biting back as much as i have. lol. but then he was saying he kept an article for me about this car i wanted to buy...so that means he was thinking of me outside of work - oooh. bah its all probly just nothing. this dating bull**** is hard. hard hard hard. thats what i need to find is a hard man. hahaha it sucks b/c i really get along w/this guy - the communication is just there - funny, witty, and intelligent. and he gets my jokes! boo hoo. like yesterday we talked for a good hour at work in his cube. whenever we talk its always 20+ minutes. he always faces towards me, legs apart and pretty calm. he kept kinda shaking one leg a little like antsy, but calm still. idk i dont think i can read body language.

 

maybe he is just trying to be a friend to me?

 

got any opinions?

[Merin]

Originally posted by totallyconfused

 

 

maybe he is just trying to be a friend to me?

 

 

That would be my guess.

 

IME when or IF a Guy/Girl is interested in someone as more than a friend, they don't mention another person in thier life..

 

You are rebounding and still not over your relationship that just ended so of course it's on your mind.. but even if you weren't emotional about it when you spoke with him regarding what happened it still IMO gives off the vibe saying 1) You're not over it and 2) You're looking at him as a friend to offer you advice or comfort.. make sense?

[sanne]

well if you feel healed enough to jump back into the dating pool then go ahead by all means. it sounds like this could be a very bad idea though since I don't think your over your ex.

[totallyconfused]

Merin i am completely in your direction of thoughts...i guess its just wishful thinking on my part.

 

he did say that he was single to me tho...i even joked around it about to him. but then today he quickly mentioned that girl damn, did he say I was seeing or ive been seeing. idk...i guess its off to the dating pool...eck

 

btw what does IME and IMO stand for?

[Merin]

Originally posted by totallyconfused

Merin i am completely in your direction of thoughts...i guess its just wishful thinking on my part.

 

he did say that he was single to me tho...i even joked around it about to him. but then today he quickly mentioned that girl damn, did he say I was seeing or ive been seeing. idk...i guess its off to the dating pool...eck

 

btw what does IME and IMO stand for?

 

IME= In My Experience

 

Hang in there Girl.. one thing at a time, you'll be okay

[justagirl1121]

Originally posted by Angelina1433

 

It would be so much easier if he'd just ask me

 

 

 

 

yeah i hear you on that. I am in similar situation. tho we dont work together anymore. mine seems like he's interested, but nothing happened ever, i dont know if it will.

 

i'm badly afraid of asking or being rejected too.

 

tho IME, i did tell a kid i liked him, and he said he liked tihs other girl and i am not good at communicating stuff like that so i kinda clammed up. it was awkward but i got over him pretty easily.

 

so even if there is rejection, its not the end of the world. however i didnt have to see him again so.....

 

 

i have asked this new person out a few times, mostly a group thing nad he came....it was awkward, i was trying to be natural, third time i asked over phone, he didnt go out. but he'll say things like 'he wants to...' or last night he was like "who's emily, why didn't i meet her? am i not cool enough, blah blah" so i was like "oh waht do we need to make some plans hmm?" and he was like 'i was just kidding"

 

so that was almost like he was trying to hint at something but then ended it with "i was joking" (ie. no no dont want to hang out with you..)

 

he did that before like 2x when he couldnt go. he'd be like since i didnt go does that mean i'm shunned forever, etc?

 

 

i would say, if you are sure he likes you then have him hang out casually. i have never bene on a date, never had anyone ask me out but i know i would feel much more comfortable going out if it wasnt a date b/c i dont know what to do...a date can happen when u feel less awkward im sure. do it! just hanging out will make u feel better and help u to get to know him!