almsolitarie Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Hi everybody, I´d like to get some input in here. That´s the situation. I met a guy on a dating site and we went for a coffee. I had the impression he was impressed about me. After less than an hour the guy said he had a meeting and had to leave and later that afternoon sent me a txt message saying that is was nice to meet me and that he will call me over the weekend. He never did and I left 4 weeks on holidays abroad. On my way back he sent an email apologising for not being in touch, saying that he was very busy, and asking if I wanted to go out with him. As weather has been pretty tough (-35) he suggested to go to his place for dinner. I accepted and I do not know how he manage but last thing I remember is that we were in bed all night. I got up once at night, passed next to his iphone and saw that 3 girls had phoned him during our date. In the morning I asked him if he had fun and he said yes. I asked if he wanted to see me again, so he answered "of course" but when I left the car he kissed me in my lips and did not mention when he is going to call of if he will. And before took him a month to contact me. I have had very bad experiences before and in this date I was not looking for any physical contact so I feel very dissappointed with myself as I was hoping to get to know a person before jumping int sex. I had also a slightly feeling that the guy is not going to call anymore as I gave him what he wanted. I do not know whether I am being like this because of past relationships and bad experiences or because he might be an a""hole. I would like to add him of fb to check him out and see if I am judging him wrongly but my friends told me not to do it. Some input here might be appreciated.
somedude81 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 What I don't understand at all is why you would like to be #4 at the minimum, in his harem. Don't you have any self-respect?
ditzchic Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 He probably will call again. Eventually. When he wants to bone again. Don't answer. That's all this guy wants. Move on and take the lesson. It's hard, I know. Anyone with a sex drive makes a boneheaded mistake like this on occasion. Don't put too much stock in it. Just move on.
xpaperxcutx Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 If he does call, you are officially a booty call. A guy is interested if he " dates" you. You cannot go from a coffee date (wth is a coffee date anyways? seems like you just hung out!!) to full blown sex on the second meeting. And really three missed calls? This guy is a player. Now go get a check up ato make sure you're STD free.
Author almsolitarie Posted January 18, 2012 Author Posted January 18, 2012 I don´t know what I was thinking. I didn´t drink that much, just a glass of wine and suddenly I felt like if I had a lot of alcohol. I can´t believe I allowed myself to be used by someone in such a way.
Frogwife Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 (edited) I don´t know what I was thinking. I didn´t drink that much, just a glass of wine and suddenly I felt like if I had a lot of alcohol. I can´t believe I allowed myself to be used by someone in such a way. Oh, attitudes like this! You didn't "allow yourself to be used'... you weren't used! You willingly had sex with a guy you didn't know, that you had no relationship with and who hadn't shown much interest in you. He wasn't offering or promising anything, to say you were "used" just isn't true. Edited January 18, 2012 by Frogwife
Author almsolitarie Posted January 18, 2012 Author Posted January 18, 2012 if I wasn´t used how come I can´t remember pretty much anything that happened since I drunk a glass of wine until this morning? I am not a heavy drinker but as far I am aware a glass of wine doesn´t make you so drunk.
ditzchic Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 if I wasn´t used how come I can´t remember pretty much anything that happened since I drunk a glass of wine until this morning? I am not a heavy drinker but as far I am aware a glass of wine doesn´t make you so drunk. Ok so you are implying that you were roofied and date raped but you're worried about if he will call you???? Are you kidding me?????
FitChick Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 what part of 'don't be a slut' do some woman not get? A fellow who is enamored with you and interested in you for the longer term will wait. Deep inside his psyche he wants you to wait. I guess you didn't get the memo about women being empowered when they do things like this.
Author almsolitarie Posted January 18, 2012 Author Posted January 18, 2012 I believe that implying date rape is far too much. I guess all of you are right: I should move on, forget this guy, and learn from the lesson. My mistake things went out of my hands too easily.
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