i made a mess Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 So in 8 days it would have been 5 months since I last heard from my ex. I haven't heard a peep, he changed his number, chose not to respond to communcations I sent by mail or email (through the dating website I found him on). I hurt him with the constant breaking up due to my commitment/rejection fears and now he's done the same by completely shutting me out of his life with no warning and just walked away entirely. Today, while at work, he called. I was away from my desk, when I came back...BAM missed call and voicemail. He called and said "Hey Miss Courtney, It's me. It's been a long time, I hope all is well with you. This is my new number. (then he repeated it twice) Give me a call. Talk to you later. I'm almost to (the name of the town I live near) right at this intersection on (insert road names). Ok, talk to you later". My theory is this. It sounds a little highschoolish, however 2 weeks ago I was in traffic at a stop light and I noticed a car inching up next to me and the driver staring. Not wanting to be obvious, i looked over to see who was creeping on me and realized it was my ex in his police cruiser. So i looked at him with no emotion and turned back to face the road. i haven't tried to contact him lately so I think he's feeling me out. Ugh. I haven't called back because I'm so conflicted. I don't know why he called. I've been praying and waiting for this day however the fear of not knowing why he called or what he wants/purpose is making me nauseous. I am half way through a bottle of wine trying to decide what I'll say when I do talk to him. Any suggestions? Thoughts of what this is/ what he wants? Link to post Share on other sites
Irishlove Posted April 8, 2011 Share Posted April 8, 2011 He sounds like he's not playing and can get any woman. heck he is a man in uniform. You rather want him or don't. Why would you drink wine to have a civil conversation to not remember a damn thing you said? Call him and say I was just thinking about you and seeing what you are up to. Let him take it from there. He sounds like he is done done done....Miss Courtney. Link to post Share on other sites
Author i made a mess Posted April 9, 2011 Author Share Posted April 9, 2011 I've calmed down and called him about 2 hours ago. I had to leave a voicemail since he's on duty but if given a 2nd chance, I'm taking it and not letting him go! EVER again. But I just can't get my hopes up. Link to post Share on other sites
Duckduckgoose Posted April 9, 2011 Share Posted April 9, 2011 Just remember that he could really get any woman he wants with that uniform and pretty car with flashing lights. They can also use their police buddies to keep track of you if they want. Like if you really break their heart they can make your life hell for a while. I am interested in a cop myself... I wonder what it's like to date one tbh Link to post Share on other sites
Author i made a mess Posted April 9, 2011 Author Share Posted April 9, 2011 Just remember that he could really get any woman he wants with that uniform and pretty car with flashing lights. They can also use their police buddies to keep track of you if they want. Like if you really break their heart they can make your life hell for a while. I am interested in a cop myself... I wonder what it's like to date one tbh True story, but thankfully he's not vindictive like that. I hurt him pretty badly (he's really sensitive) and he's not done one thing in retaliation other than to protect himself by changing his number and stop talking to me. Dating a law enforcement officer is not just about dating a man who looks great in a uniform and has a status of "power". They typically have crappy hours, you hardly see them, they are awake weird hours, when they are on duty it's constant worry. They carry their stress around and don't talk too much about what they see on a day to day basis. I can't tell you how many times I'd wake up hearing a police officer had been shot or fatally wounded overnight and I'd be late to work sitting by the TV waiting to hear a name if he wasn't answering the phone (he was usually sleeping by the time I'd wake up). It takes patience, dedication, and a lot of trust and commitment when you date one. But on the other hand, I've never felt safer with someone in my entire life. Link to post Share on other sites
0hpenelope Posted April 9, 2011 Share Posted April 9, 2011 Good luck, OP! Let us know how you fare. Link to post Share on other sites
Author i made a mess Posted April 10, 2011 Author Share Posted April 10, 2011 I had returned his call on Friday but had to leave a voicemail since he was on duty. He called me a little after 9am yesterday. Since it had been 5 months since we last really had any dialogue at all, it was a bit awkward, but I tried to be as relaxed as I could be during the conversation. It was small talk really (i.e.: How's work? How've you been? What are your plans this weekend? etc). He did a little bit of reminiscing about a drink that I had got him hooked on but nothing too deep. We didn't make plans to see eachother, but he did leave the ball in my court saying "Well, you have my new number now". So I will take that as him leaving it in my hands to establish the communication next, which I will do with out hesitation. I've decided that if a second chance is on the table, that I can't ask about the last 5 months. I know why he did what he did, and I'm just incredibly thankful that he has reached out. For what purpose, I am not sure yet, but I feel re-hashing the past or keeping that in my mind will only cause me to carry some negativity into whatever this development is. I feel this is an opportunity for a fresh start, to both put our best foot forward and just see what happens. No fear...just head first in whatever comes my way. I am not going to get my hopes up that he wants anything more than friendship right now. I'll be sure to update along the way as things progress. Link to post Share on other sites
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