youngskywalker Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 So I met a girl online and after having a great chat for a few hours we decided to go out for a date. The date went really good. We had great conversation, coffee, a small walk around town and then a few drinks. By the end of the night she was the typical girl. She was giving all the signs that she liked me. Playing with here hair non-stop, touching my knee from time to time, and I even got a little kiss on the cheek when we said goodbye. So I call the girl up two days later. We talked a little and I asked her if she'd like to go out for dinner. She says yes of course. Ok, day one, she cancels. Day two she cancels. All of this is now going on with text messages and she said that she's busy with work. Perhaps that's true, I have no reason to believe otherwise. She said tonight for sure and that she was sorry. So now I'm on the third try and I think same is going to happen. I'll know in a couple hours lol. She said tonight for sure! I said it's all okay and just let me know. The question is should I even bother to contact her? I'll feel like a fool if I call or text her and she says no again. Not only that, I tried twice so why should I try the third time? I'm thinking the best route to go now is just not contact her anymore and see if she comes around. Any advice?
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 Stop texting to set up dates. It encourages wishy-washy behavior like this. Call her.
redmelon Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 she said tonight for sure, so go with that thought until you are told otherwise. if she does cancel, then tell her that she can contact you when she has free time because you feel like you are chasing someone who doesn't want to be chased at this point.
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 she said tonight for sure, so go with that thought until you are told otherwise. if she does cancel, then tell her that she can contact you when she has free time because you feel like you are chasing someone who doesn't want to be chased at this point. I wouldn't even go this far... If a girl cancels three consecutive dates, regardless of reason, that's an insta-LAUNCH. Even if they are 100% legitimate reasons and she is truly interested in me, it just shows me that she has difficulty making and keeping appointments...this goes beyond interest in dating...it's a straight up character flaw...and a lack of consideration for others...
Author youngskywalker Posted October 21, 2010 Author Posted October 21, 2010 I tend to agree with you bro. If I was interested in a girl I will go through ANYTHING to make the date. When a girl says, "I worked late and I'm really tired" is lame. I'm T-minus 10 at this point. Prepare for launch. What trips me up is why did she girl show so much interest? Why give me a kiss on the cheek? Why are girls so mean like that? I would never do that.
Author youngskywalker Posted October 21, 2010 Author Posted October 21, 2010 and BTW I took your advice and stopped the texting. I called her just now and said, Hi, 'name', I'm just wondering if were still on for tonight. Give me a call if you're interested, talk to you later, bye. T-minus 10, 9, 8, 7
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 What trips me up is why did she girl show so much interest? Why give me a kiss on the cheek? Why are girls so mean like that? I would never do that. Why didn't you give her a kiss on the lips...? And people's minds often change even after a great first date...for any number of reasons, a girl may change her mind after a few days and decide she doesn't want to continue dating you...it happens...
Author youngskywalker Posted October 21, 2010 Author Posted October 21, 2010 I think kissing on the first date is a little fast. But that's just me. Good point about peoples mind's just change. I'm sure that's what happened here. I really liked this girl but I guess I have to accept the fact... the shipped sailed. Thanks for the advice. Even tho it was only one date is still hurts to get dumped lol.
stillafool Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 OP, after the 3rd cancellation you should have moved on to someone else. Why do you want to date her so badly?
redmelon Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 you're not dumped, as of right now you are still on for tonight, aren't ya? maybe she has really been having a stressful time at work, give her the benefit of the doubt until you hear otherwise.
Scorpio13c Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 I tend to agree with you bro. If I was interested in a girl I will go through ANYTHING to make the date. When a girl says, "I worked late and I'm really tired" is lame. I'm T-minus 10 at this point. Prepare for launch. What trips me up is why did she girl show so much interest? Why give me a kiss on the cheek? Why are girls so mean like that? I would never do that. That's online dating for you, if she's even just cute, she'll have a plethora of guys messaging her. So even though she showed interest in you, likely some other guy has also taken her interest. May the best man win in her mind. Thus the flakery.. Good luck Man
tylerdurden Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 A girl interested in you MAKES time for you even if her schedule is crazy. As for me 2 cancellation and the girl is out.
Author youngskywalker Posted October 21, 2010 Author Posted October 21, 2010 O.K. time for me to eat my words...... She just called. We're going out tonight. I pick her up at 8
USMCHokie Posted October 21, 2010 Posted October 21, 2010 O.K. time for me to eat my words...... She just called. We're going out tonight. I pick her up at 8 Fantastic! Have fun!
Titania22 Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 I think kissing on the first date is a little fast. I like this. As a girl, I like to have a chance to have my anticipation built up. I certainly wouldn't turn down another date with a guy who didn't kiss me, but I wanted him to. I would however turn down a date with a guy who tried to kiss me, when I hadn't even thought about it yet.
Confusedalways Posted October 22, 2010 Posted October 22, 2010 I like this. As a girl, I like to have a chance to have my anticipation built up. I certainly wouldn't turn down another date with a guy who didn't kiss me, but I wanted him to. I would however turn down a date with a guy who tried to kiss me, when I hadn't even thought about it yet. I agree 10000%! I would very much prefer to not kiss on the first date
Author youngskywalker Posted October 22, 2010 Author Posted October 22, 2010 (edited) I thought I would follow up and let you all know how the date went. It was awesome!!!! Everything went great and now I'm high as a kite (the natural way) lol. I thought about the whole thing and I want to give my two cents worth. Some people have pre-determined standards on what to do in situations like if a girl cancels. There is nothing wrong with that and it's good to have those in place if it works for you. However, I'm the type of person who feels offended or rejected if a girl would cancel once or twice. I was ready to launch, not because my brain told me but because my feelings told me. I almost missed out on an incredible night with a really sweet girl because I thought she was rejecting me when actually she wasn't. She's been putting together a project at work. If i would have fussed about it and showed any insecurity then I bet there was NO chance I would get a date after that point. If in doubt, control your feelings and show strength. Your date will find that attractive. Okay that was pretty darn sappy but maybe it will help someone out. Edited October 22, 2010 by youngskywalker wrong post
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