shadowplay Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 (edited) Met him on OKC a few weeks ago. Our date is this Monday. We started with messages on the site, then iming, and now it's gone to constant texting and iming every day (he invariably initiates). We've probably sent about 20 texts back and forth just today. I kind of wish he'd lay off, because it's building up all this anticipation for what is really just a casual date. I'm just wondering the male mindset behind this behavior. Why would you want this amount of communication before actually meeting the girl? Like what exactly is your aim? Btw, this hasn't changed my opinion of him at all. I really like him so far. I just don't want everything to fizzle out when we meet because of all the pressure. Edited September 3, 2010 by shadowplay
meerkat stew Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 I'm just wondering the male mindset behind this behavior. Why would you want this amount of communication before actually meeting the girl? Like what exactly is your aim? No way to tell, he could just really like your profile and enjoy your text convos, be a bit insecure himself, or be setting up for a first date close.
atlnay Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 I think there is a fine line between staying on the radar & overdoing it. A guy I met online knew there were others between the time of our intial email & our first meeting in two days & that i already met someone & he was next. His tactic was, if he kept my interest via texts during those 2 days, he'd have a good shot...lol...& in my case, it worked. Plus I did like him IRL. What you can do is slow down your pace in replying to his texts, quick replies suggest mutual banter. Even take an hour if need be. Or just tell him in a nice way to save some of the banter for face to face. He should back off with no issue.
USMCHokie Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 I personally think this is a bit excessive...well, a lot excessive...normally, once I get a phone number after exchanging some messages through the online dating service, I'll call and set up a date. I will then call again the day before the date to confirm. There's no texting or anything between... But to each their own...
LondonS Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 well if you dont reply, he,ll lay off.. If I get a text from a guy in the morning, I reply in the evening...I dont want to become cyber buddy before the date..I dont text more than 3/4 a day at most to guys I meet on Match.
sagetalk Posted September 3, 2010 Posted September 3, 2010 I personally think this is a bit excessive...well, a lot excessive...normally, once I get a phone number after exchanging some messages through the online dating service, I'll call and set up a date. I will then call again the day before the date to confirm. There's no texting or anything between... But to each their own... Bingo, same here, although sometimes it takes a few phone calls to get a date (not all of us are studs). Who in the world wants to talk to a girl they've never met on a text chat. Phone is the way to go, it makes you less expendable. Plus, you know for sure you're not talking to a 400lb dude .
SincereOnlineGuy Posted September 12, 2010 Posted September 12, 2010 Met him on OKC a few weeks ago. Our date is this Monday. We started with messages on the site, then iming, and now it's gone to constant texting and iming every day (he invariably initiates). We've probably sent about 20 texts back and forth just today. I kind of wish he'd lay off, because it's building up all this anticipation for what is really just a casual date. I'm just wondering the male mindset behind this behavior. Why would you want this amount of communication before actually meeting the girl? Like what exactly is your aim? Btw, this hasn't changed my opinion of him at all. I really like him so far. I just don't want everything to fizzle out when we meet because of all the pressure. Meeting online people in real life is a lot like human romantic relationships in that you simply will not, and cannot get anything more out of it than you are willing to invest into it.
Raderick Posted September 12, 2010 Posted September 12, 2010 I personally wait a little while because 1) To see if this is a legitimate person. 1a) I notice that a lot of women on OKC won't give their phone number out or IMing info too quickly or wait until after a certain amount of communication. 2) If this person surely is what she says she is (looking out for backtracking) 3) To see if we have anything else in common.
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