4allison Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 i've only been married for 8 months. but lately my husband had enough of my episodes and drama, because i can't let go of my sad past experiences. anyway, he's been into online dating stuff and i found out and i saw my husband's email to his ex-wife, even if we were married then. (they have 2 kids and divorced for 6 years). i was hurt reading his email because he still treats her like his wife, saying i love you and i miss you but is lying about so many things like when we were in our honeymoon, he told her he was on a business trip. is he making it up so he can still see his kids or what? she cheated him that's why he divorced her, they've been married of almost 15 years. i'm so confused, i asked him once if he still emails her and if he still loves her, he said no they just decide for their kids and nothing else ... what am i going to do???
LosingitAll Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 I can tell u from personal experience lying doesn't stop it only gets worse. The more u let him get away with the more he will do. Trust me on that I gave everything to my wife & she betrayed the hell out of me. Some good advice I've read on here that I wish I would have know from the beginning of my marriage. Is to let him know that ur not going to stand for it, let him know there's consequences for his actions. U don't want to end up 3 years into ur marriage & get extemely hurt. That is a very bad road & u shouldn't have to travel down it. I'm sure u love him very much or u guys wouldn't be married. He obviously can't stop contact with his ex due to the kids. For me though emails telling ur ex that u love them has nothing to do with the kids. I would say that u guys may want to consider counseling. I not one to tell u to leave to prove ur point that ur not going to stand for his actions. I'm just saying u can't let it go on or it will get worse. That's what happened to me & to many others I've read about. I'm all for working out marriages just don't fall into the trap I did.
BlackLovely Posted August 23, 2010 Posted August 23, 2010 i've only been married for 8 months. but lately my husband had enough of my episodes and drama, because i can't let go of my sad past experiences. anyway, he's been into online dating stuff and i found out and i saw my husband's email to his ex-wife, even if we were married then. (they have 2 kids and divorced for 6 years). i was hurt reading his email because he still treats her like his wife, saying i love you and i miss you but is lying about so many things like when we were in our honeymoon, he told her he was on a business trip. is he making it up so he can still see his kids or what? she cheated him that's why he divorced her, they've been married of almost 15 years. i'm so confused, i asked him once if he still emails her and if he still loves her, he said no they just decide for their kids and nothing else ... what am i going to do??? It sounds like you are taking all the blame for the relationship problems. It takes two to tango, mama. If he will cheat on his ex, what makes you think he'll be faithful to you? I'm so sorry to say this, but he is most likely still banging his ex. Your hubby is still telling his ex wife that he loves her and misses her; this goes waaay beyond talking about the children. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Clearly, he only thinks of himself. Confront him with what you know, put your foot down! A man will only treat you the way you let him. Good luck, hon. Give us an update.
Author 4allison Posted August 23, 2010 Author Posted August 23, 2010 why did he marry me in the first place if he still loves his ex. he told me that she's as cold as fish after their first child and he's lonely. i've been trying to tell him that i want nothing but honesty. but i've been mean to him, i didn't know about it after i read his emails. he'll never admit it even if i confront him and i can't let him know i know about his emails with his ex coz he'll probably find a way to hide it from me, then i wouldn't know ... i'm so confused....
Lizzie60 Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 i've only been married for 8 months. but lately my husband had enough of my episodes and drama, because i can't let go of my sad past experiences. anyway, he's been into online dating stuff and i found out and i saw my husband's email to his ex-wife, even if we were married then. (they have 2 kids and divorced for 6 years). i was hurt reading his email because he still treats her like his wife, saying i love you and i miss you but is lying about so many things like when we were in our honeymoon, he told her he was on a business trip. is he making it up so he can still see his kids or what? she cheated him that's why he divorced her, they've been married of almost 15 years. i'm so confused, i asked him once if he still emails her and if he still loves her, he said no they just decide for their kids and nothing else ... what am i going to do??? I am not sure I understand.. why would he lie to her to see his kids? I would suppose they are divorced and he has visitation rights... no need to lie about his life to see his kids... Methink he's lying to you ... and he is still having something with her.
Terrylynn Posted August 28, 2010 Posted August 28, 2010 i knw you love him but me and my sister had a discussion about your blogg and she says dah he treat her like a wife still so what would you think i say either leave or find proof cause he aint going to admit it and speakin from a married woman to another i have been cheated on and separated 3 times in the 4 in a half years we been married just be careful dont be nobodys fool you can make an ass out of yourself you dont need no help much love terrylynn muh.
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