MashedPotatoes Posted April 24, 2010 Posted April 24, 2010 I posted this in the general discussion thread, but figured I get more responses here. So I've been into this girl for quite a while now (about 6 months). We've known each other since childhood, but just recently reconnected last June. She came to a couple parties I threw (by herself) and we hung out here and there for the past couple months. I'm 80% sure there is interest on her part but some things she said/did these past couple months is the reason why I still have about 20% doubt, if that makes any sense. We were never close friends growing up, just old friends. I invited her to join me in a jog/hike through the mountains (4-5 mile loop) knowing that she loves outdoor activities. I've been training for a 10k as well, and having a partner to train with makes it a little easier. Anyways, she accepted my invite. This is going to be the first time where it's just the two us spending time together. I technically didn't ask her out on a "date", I merely asked if she wanted to join me in my training. Would do you people think? Is this a date? Is this a way of her showing me that she's interested? Either way, I'm glad that we're going to have this time together, alone, and get to know her a little better.
Cinderella7 Posted April 24, 2010 Posted April 24, 2010 Honestly, if hanging out and training together goes well, why not ask her out for a real date? You'll figure out whether or not she's interested and she will probably find your confidence in asking her out directly very attractive.
Author MashedPotatoes Posted April 28, 2010 Author Posted April 28, 2010 So here's a little update: We were supposed to go on our jog yesterday late afternoon. I sent her a text earlier in the day to confirm and didn't hear back from her until 3 hours later. Apparently she had just woken up from a nap and apologized. I brushed it off, thinking to myself, this is the last straw. However, she calls me about 20 minutes later and says she wants to make it up to me by treating me to dinner. We met up at a local sushi restaurant, had some laughs, flirting, good food, sake, all in all a fun time. I expected that we would part ways after dinner but she wanted to take a little walk around town. While we're walking she mentioned that she'd always wanted to walk my dog (I have an English Bulldog) so after buying her a cupcake we go back to my place (in separate cars) and we take my dog around the block for a little walk. We come back to my place and she starts perusing my book collection and we begin to discuss some books that she was interested in. I kind of got the sense that she was lingering and waiting for me to do "something" or maybe she really was going through my books. Since this wasn't an "official" date, I was a little hesitant. She ended up borrowing two books and I accompanied her back to the car, we say our goodbyes, hug...end of the night. So....we technically went on a date, just not official. She definitely knows that I'm interested in her so I don't think she would be playing with my emotions...the two of us, having dinner, walking around town, coming back to my place...on a saturday night nonetheless. There is just this one thing that I can't get out of my head...several months ago when we first started hanging out, after sending her a text inviting her out to an event, she responded with "thanks for the invite, can't make it out tonight. i consider you and your sister like My bro and sis...." Now, we all know what that means, but I gave her the benefit of the doubt and thought along the lines of maybe she thought I was being too forward, or she was too busy to commit to anything (she was studying for the lsat, applying to law school, and interning at a law firm) and wanted me to back off. I broke off all contact until recently we started hanging out again. So what should I think here folks? I'm curious to see what other people think. I'm going to officially ask her out soon...just need a little encouragement
befreckled Posted April 28, 2010 Posted April 28, 2010 There is just this one thing that I can't get out of my head...several months ago when we first started hanging out, after sending her a text inviting her out to an event, she responded with "thanks for the invite, can't make it out tonight. i consider you and your sister like My bro and sis...." Now, we all know what that means, but I gave her the benefit of the doubt and thought along the lines of maybe she thought I was being too forward, or she was too busy to commit to anything (she was studying for the lsat, applying to law school, and interning at a law firm) and wanted me to back off. I broke off all contact until recently we started hanging out again. So what should I think here folks? I'm curious to see what other people think. I'm going to officially ask her out soon...just need a little encouragement I would never tell a guy that I'm even remotely interested in that I treat him like my own brother. No way, no how. Perhaps she's changed her mind. More likely, she already feels that since she's told you how she feels about you..then she can hang out with you comfortably. My close friends are guys and, there is zero attraction..we train together, we go for dinner, I have gone back to their place on the weekends and check out their book collection..or just hang out. I'm leaning towards no but, you could ask her out on proper date - it has to be really obvious like a fancy dinner date or a movie date where it's a chick flick for example..and see what her answer is.
phineas Posted April 28, 2010 Posted April 28, 2010 this is why I don't "hang out" with female aquaintences & don't bring them over to my house for psudo/non dates. I'll hang out with a woman once or twice & figure out if I like her personality along with her looks then i'll tell her i'm digging her & let her decide. I may still wind up in the friendzone, but at least i'm no longer getting attached to a chick who isn't interested in me.
Phateless Posted April 28, 2010 Posted April 28, 2010 I posted this in the general discussion thread, but figured I get more responses here. So I've been into this girl for quite a while now (about 6 months). We've known each other since childhood, but just recently reconnected last June. She came to a couple parties I threw (by herself) and we hung out here and there for the past couple months. I'm 80% sure there is interest on her part but some things she said/did these past couple months is the reason why I still have about 20% doubt, if that makes any sense. We were never close friends growing up, just old friends. I invited her to join me in a jog/hike through the mountains (4-5 mile loop) knowing that she loves outdoor activities. I've been training for a 10k as well, and having a partner to train with makes it a little easier. Anyways, she accepted my invite. This is going to be the first time where it's just the two us spending time together. I technically didn't ask her out on a "date", I merely asked if she wanted to join me in my training. Would do you people think? Is this a date? Is this a way of her showing me that she's interested? Either way, I'm glad that we're going to have this time together, alone, and get to know her a little better. I think she likes you. More importantly, what does her body language say when you are together? Does she look deep in your eyes and hold eye contact? Does she play with her hair when you're around? Does she touch your arm when she laughs or when talking to you? Does she laugh at your jokes when they really aren't THAT funny? Does she stand close to you? Is her body turned toward you? Are her pupils dilated? Do some googling on "body language cues that she likes you." If the answer to at least 3 is yes, she is ready for you to kiss her. Seriously. It only takes 3 "signs." When you are on your hike, find ways to touch her and flirt. Grabbing her hand to help her or lead her through difficult terrain or helping her in/out of the car can be good. Put your hand on the small of her back as you lead her somewhere. Make sure you hug her hello and goodbye at the very least. High fives are silly and fun and another good way to build touching. This is a day-date so date don't feel like you have to kiss her today, but build your chemistry, get to know her, and look for those signs!
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