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Questions about Letting Go Answer these it s gain perspective!

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By health
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health Established Member

health

Posted
Posted

This is from the Book Rebuidling when your Relationship Ends. Be sure to pick it up. It helps me alot! Lets answer these together. First state how long you have been broken up. Then how long no contact. Copy and paste them from below.

 

I have been 1 year 1 month broken up. Over 9 months no contact.

 

  1. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. - Yes. Sometimes more.
  2. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. Yes.
  3. I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. Not really, sometimes I still get hurt.
  4. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. Yes.
  5. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. Yes.
  6. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. Yes.
  7. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. Not really.
  8. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. In a way Yes.
  9. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. Yes, but sometimes miss it, scared I won't find someone as attractive - I have faith I will though.
  10. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. Yes.
  11. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. Yes. At times it's hard.
  12. I feel like a single person rathr than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner. Yes.
  13. I am no longer angry at my former love partner. Sometimes I still get upset. Generally I don't care.

 

Copy and past here>>>

  1. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now.
  2. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner.
  3. I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner.
  4. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner.
  5. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together.
  6. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner.
  7. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends.
  8. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner.
  9. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner.
  10. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner.
  11. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person.
  12. I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner.
  13. I am no longer angry at my former love partner.

nobmagnet Established Member

nobmagnet

Posted
Posted

1. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now.

 

Only if i have a nightmere.:laugh:

 

 

2. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner.

 

Never only if I have a knife in my hand:p

 

3.I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner.

 

Only if i think he is happy.:lmao:

 

4. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner.

 

never could never will.:cool:

 

5. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together.

 

 

Too bloody right! He is a lowly worm!:D

 

6. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner.

 

Yes he has nothing to say that i am interested in......Its my life now ......wooooooohooooooo:bunny::bunny::bunny:

 

7. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends.

 

only to laugh at his Karma:lmao::lmao:

 

8. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner.

 

Yes romance was never a part of him so its nowt new:laugh::laugh:

 

9. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former

love partner.

 

errrrrrrrrrrrrrr premature ejaculation...............need i say more??:mad::mad::mad::mad:

 

10. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner.

 

He gave up years ago! My turn now!:laugh::laugh:

 

11. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person.

 

Well yes but.......... he has just been dumped!!:lmao::lmao::lmao::lmao:

 

I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner.

 

Too right!!!!!!!! single content and having fun!:bunny::bunny::bunny:

 

I am no longer angry at my former love partner.

 

No I laugh inside.:p:laugh::D

 

 

now thats soooooo true. I know i am lucky.

 

nice to fill it in!!

 

wish i could let him read it to be fare but no its how i feel nothing to do with him!

 

what a great load of questions and im sorry mine is the first reply/ second but maybe some of you might see there is light at the end of the tunnel??

 

Thank you i have has a right giggle!!

 

Nobby xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • Author
health Established Member

health

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Ha Ha Ha! Nice! How long have you been broken up, n/c for?

nobmagnet Established Member

nobmagnet

Posted
Posted

september for the final darling.............feb last year for the first step.

 

im sorry if i seem well.no idea how i seem to be fare...........im doing really well has to be Lc cuz kids but ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh karma two says ago tastes like nectar!!!!!

 

sorry but HELLO!!

 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxNobby! xx

Pentel Established Member

Pentel

Posted
Posted

1.-I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. - i rarely think of her, like once a week

2.-I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. - i don't fantisize about being with her, i fantisize about being with other people

3.-I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. - mmm, mad maybe?, sometimes mad, not because she left me, but because all the time i wasted with her for nothing

4.-I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. - i dont even talk with her, at school i ignore her, and im really happy NC.

5.-I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. - long time done, even if she came back i would say "nah" and leave the scene

6.- I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. - since christmas 2009 i have stopped all contact

7.-I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. - only when ppl are talking about their exes

8.-I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. - no more feelings, just being a little mad at her and uncomfortable when she's near

9.-I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. - nah it wasnt really that good, for her it was, for me? meeh

10.-I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. - im ready to give myself to another person, one that deserves it

11.-I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. - know i will feel a little akward but only for like 5 min after i know, then i wouldnt care

12.- I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner. - i feel like a single person, cause i dont talk with my former partner

13.-I am no longer angry at my former love partner. yes i still am, a little bit,

 

 

sooo, i guess im pretty much over her right?

nobmagnet Established Member

nobmagnet

Posted
Posted

yep petal!!

 

nice place??

 

hahahah

 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxnobby x

professorTR Member

professorTR

Posted
Posted

I think of my former love partner only occasionally now...still spend fractions of every hour thinking about her

I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. I still think about her running back, saying she made a mistake, etc.

I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. I sometimes do. I think of old memories, but I don't treasure them because I'd still like to make more

I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. I really can't, so I guess I've stopped trying. I do tell her that things would be different, etc.

I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. At times I accept this, but at other times i still think "this can't be...we're meant to be together."

I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. The only time I talk to her is when I feel depressed about it, when I have a bad thought or perception about how everything is going down. The other excuses are when we have to talk about money, property, etc.

I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. I mention her at least once with any friend I talk to

I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. I still think about how I'd like to romance her.

I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. I wouldn't want just a sexual relationship with her anyway

I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. I still feel bonded to her in this way. It's making it tough for me with the new girl I've been seeing.

I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. I'm having a real hard time with this. It's another rejection of me as a lover...it's as if I'm not man enough to satisfy her

I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner. Well, I'm sort of in a relationship with someone else, but I still feel connected to my ex.

I am no longer angry at my former love partner. At times I get furious about her moving on like this is no big deal and living in the house I bought.

0hpenelope Established Member

0hpenelope

Posted
Posted

  1. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. - True.
  2. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. - Oh so true!
  3. I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. - Does angry fall under emotionally upset? Because if it does, then HELL YES. Which is why I don't think about him, it just makes me mad as heck.
  4. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. - True. Haven't talked to him in about 3 years or so. I've been MIA & want to stay that way.
  5. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. - YOU BET! :mad::mad:
  6. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. - True.
  7. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. - True!
  8. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. - True. Long gone now. :rolleyes:
  9. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. - True. :sick:
  10. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. - True!
  11. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. - True! She can have him, I don't want him. Her problem, not mine! :)
  12. I feel like a single person rather than a person in a committed relationship with my former love partner. - 100% Miss Independent.
  13. I am no longer angry at my former love partner. - False. Everything about our memories makes me angry, so I just don't think about him. Waste of time!

Ilovecake Established Member

Ilovecake

Posted
Posted


    2. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. – only when I come to this site
    3. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. – change rarely to never.
    4. I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. – I still get mad when he tries to contact me or tries to be friendly.
    5. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. – that happened prior to the breakup
    6. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. – the second we broke up.
    7. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. – very much so.
    8. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. – very rarely
    9. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. – yes, completely.
    10. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. – Oh yuck, no way.
    11. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. – yes, completely.
    12. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. – oh that poor girl
    13. I feel like a single person rather than a person in a committed relationship with my former love partner. – yes and loving it.
    14. I am no longer angry at my former love partner. – no I still hate him, probably always will. It's not the same anger I felt when we first broke up though. It's much more uninvolved and distant.

ditched Member

ditched

Posted
Posted

Broken up since June. NC from July until about two weeks ago when she called me to "Say HI". NC since then.

  1. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. - I feel like I am constantly thinking about her. If I am not completely engrossed by something, my mind automatically goes to her.
  2. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. - no…I still fantasize daily about being with her.
  3. I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner - the tiniest hint of any sort of memory of her usually upsets me. then I go for the whiskey. I’m still crying over it once or twice a week.
  4. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. - yes, because I can’t please her. I want to but…there is nothing I can do to please her.
  5. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. - completely false. I spend most of my day hoping that she will call/text/email/pocketdial me something that might bring us back together.
  6. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. This is true because I’ve realized that if I hear anything less than “im sorry and think we should give it another try”, I will lose it and wallow in misery. So I just avoid talking to her.
  7. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. - Untrue, I’m surprised that my friends are still my friends the way I go on and on about her.
  8. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. Completely untrue.
  9. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. Completely untrue. Actually…I find it difficult to start new sexual relationships because theyre not with her.
  10. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. I don’t know what this means exactly. But I’m going to go with UNTRUE.
  11. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. WHAT?!? The thought makes me nauseous. I’d rather just not know.
  12. I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner. Sure, I feel single. And alone.
  13. I am no longer angry at my former love partner. Im usually just sad. Every once in awhile Anger creeps in, but its mostly confusion and longing.

So…how’d I do? failed miserably? Yeah I thought so. Where’s that whiskey…

jlr Established Member

jlr

Posted
Posted

I think of my former love partner only occasionally now.

Less than before, but more often than "occasionally."

 

I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner.

I wouldn't say I fantasize about it much anymore, no.

 

I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner.

No, I still get emotional. I'm just getting better at turning it off.

 

I have stopped trying to please my former love partner.

Yes.

 

I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together.

Yes, though I sometimes wish that wasn't the case.

 

I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner.

Yes, finally.

 

I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends.

Less than before. But it still comes up alot.

 

I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. No. I still have feelings for her.

 

I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner.

Well, we stopped that a while ago. I can't lie and say I don't miss the sex with her. But I know without the rest of it, sex is meaningless and cheap. So, yeah.

 

I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner.

Yeah, finally.

 

I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person.

Not so much. This part is still hard. Especially since she is in another relationship now.

 

I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner.

Yes.

 

I am no longer angry at my former love partner.

I'd have to say I'm still angry at her. More sad really. But I am angry at her.

  • Author
health Established Member

health

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Cool. This is a great post.

 

GUYS PLEASE REMEMBER TO PUT HOW LONG AGO YOU BROKE UP AND HOW FAR ALONG YOU ARE NO CONTACT!

 

Thank you! lol. It helps build perspective.

Pentel Established Member

Pentel

Posted
Posted
1.-I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. - i rarely think of her, like once a week

2.-I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. - i don't fantisize about being with her, i fantisize about being with other people

3.-I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. - mmm, mad maybe?, sometimes mad, not because she left me, but because all the time i wasted with her for nothing

4.-I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. - i dont even talk with her, at school i ignore her, and im really happy NC.

5.-I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. - long time done, even if she came back i would say "nah" and leave the scene

6.- I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. - since christmas 2009 i have stopped all contact

7.-I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. - only when ppl are talking about their exes

8.-I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. - no more feelings, just being a little mad at her and uncomfortable when she's near

9.-I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. - nah it wasnt really that good, for her it was, for me? meeh

10.-I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. - im ready to give myself to another person, one that deserves it

11.-I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. - know i will feel a little akward but only for like 5 min after i know, then i wouldnt care

12.- I feel like a single person rather than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner. - i feel like a single person, cause i dont talk with my former partner

13.-I am no longer angry at my former love partner. yes i still am, a little bit,

 

 

sooo, i guess im pretty much over her right?

 

broke up like 3 months ago, NC like 1 month ago, give or take a few weeks

bananaboat11 Established Member

bananaboat11

Posted
Posted

Broken up 4 months. 4 months NC.

 

  1. I think of my former love partner only occasionally now. - Sometimes...
  2. I rarely fantasize about being with my former love partner. Yes
  3. I no longer become emotionally upset when I think about my former love partner. Sometimes... but not as often
  4. I have stopped trying to please my former love partner. Yes
  5. I have accepted that my former love partner and I will not get back together. Yes
  6. I have stopped finding excuses to talk to my former love partner. Yes.
  7. I rarely talk about my former love partner with friends. No, I do...
  8. I have outgrown any feelings of romantic love for my former love partner. Yes
  9. I no longer wish to continue a sexual relationship with my former love partner. No, the sex was hot
  10. I have given up my emotional commitment to my former love partner. Yes... kind of. working on it.
  11. I can accept my former love partner having a love relationship with another person. Yes, but it sucks.
  12. I feel like a single person rathr than a person in a commited relationship with my former love partner.Yes
  13. I am no longer angry at my former love partner. No. I hope she never successfully contacts me in the future

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