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Posted

I'm a little tired to type out everything, but my story can be found at http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t201761/

 

I really regret not calling her when she was on vacation. Whatever reason I had does not excuse what I failed to do. I feel completely miserable right now because she is obviously very very sad, but she doesn't want to discuss it. She told me not to blame myself and it's not my fault, but I know that's not true. I feel like I failed her. I really don't know what to do. Should I just try to let it go and hope she'll be ready to discuss it in the next 20 years? :(

Posted
I'm a little tired to type out everything, but my story can be found at http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t201761/

 

I really regret not calling her when she was on vacation. Whatever reason I had does not excuse what I failed to do. I feel completely miserable right now because she is obviously very very sad, but she doesn't want to discuss it. She told me not to blame myself and it's not my fault, but I know that's not true. I feel like I failed her. I really don't know what to do. Should I just try to let it go and hope she'll be ready to discuss it in the next 20 years? :(

 

 

Well, I replied to your other thread.

 

Dude, you can't blame this on yourself. You did nothing wrong. She told you not to call or whatever. You obeyed that wish. What did YOU do wrong?

  • Author
Posted

Well, she told me not to call the first time I asked, but I should have called anyway to check up on her. You have to remember that we talk on the phone every night, so it was a sudden change when I didn't call her. I just found out last night from her best friend that my ex was having problems regarding her father's death again. She probably really needed me to talk to her, but she felt neglected when I didn't make any calls. We still spoke online, but that's different. It's so easy to hide your true feelings when it's just words being exchanged rather than voices.

 

She's a very complicated person, to be honest. I may not have done anything wrong per say, but I didn't exactly do the right thing either. We were in a relationship and I didn't fulfill my obligations.

  • Author
Posted

It's really bothering me because she doesn't want to believe what I'm trying to tell her. Here's part of the conversation that I had with her the day she decided to bring up our relationship:

 

8/25/2009

5:49:04 PM

Moo (Y)

Silly girl A and Stupid boy B knows each other very well. They aren't mind readers, but they usually know what the other person is thinking by their actions. Sometimes they are right. Sometimes they are not.

 

And whenever something happens, both of them aren't always at the top of their game, as they say. So when something happens, they may not immediately realise what is really going on.

 

They just look at the situation and do what they can at the moment. Only after do they realise that something else could have been done. If they did something wrong, they'll feel bad and want to do something about it.

 

But in the midst of it all, they forget that they should have done something from the very start.

and that is consult each other instead of doing things alone

wait

i forgot to add the apology thing in there

darn =s

 

5:53:33 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

epic phail

 

5:53:37 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

/fail

well, it's included in what i said...

just not specifically x.x

 

well, the point is

when something happens

and when there's a person A and a person B

the best thing to do

is to have both persons consult each other

because it's simply better that way

like um...

 

let's take dofus for example

you're an osa and i'm a xelor

we're fighting er

whatever amount of whatever monster

we both know about each other and what we usually do in situations

so we think to ourselves "yeah, that's what he's going to do" or "yeah, that's what she's going to do"

we assume

instead of taking the direct initiative to be sure

we're fighting things

and you think i'm going to use devotion on you so you can get more sp for the spells you're going to use

but as it turns out, i decided to smack the monsters with my hammer instead

and i forgot to cast devotion

 

5:57:29 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

that's when the two of you are complete strangers

 

5:57:31 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

so you're there without the ap that you needed

 

5:57:40 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

if the two of you had done that plenty of times

and have known each other

that would never happen

=p

 

5:57:49 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

no no o.o

that's not true

 

5:57:54 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

it's true

that has never happen to people who hunted with me!

*happened

if that had happened

 

5:58:23 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

christine didn't pay attention to the scenario!

 

5:58:26 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

there's obviously something very wrong with the relationship

 

5:58:31 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

no o.o

silly

 

5:58:40 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

or the person simply gives up at coordinating

 

5:58:44 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

no o.O

 

5:58:54 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

it's because it's a basic human flaw

 

5:58:55 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

if I wanted to piss someone off

I'd just give up at coordinating

and do what I like

:}

 

5:59:11 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

uh huh i know but listen! o.o

 

5:59:35 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

even when two people know each other for a very long time

and know each other well

there are times when they do things that are not always what the other person may expect

not because they don't care

or they've given up

but because they were being stupid o.o

simple as that

 

6:00:31 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

how about when they've consulted each other countless times

and have made up countless times

warned each other never to do it again

and one goes ahead and do it again anyway

o.o

 

6:00:53 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

you still need to do it constantly

 

6:00:58 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

why o.o

 

6:01:01 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

because sometimes people forget unintentionally

 

6:01:02 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

the other person doesn't listen o.o

 

6:01:07 PM

Moo (Y)

chrissy

that's not the case

 

6:01:10 PM

chrissy

Moo (Y)

really, after countless times

I wouldn't like to be with such a person =x

 

I was not able to say everything that I wanted to say or in the way I wanted to say, but that's the gist of it.

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted

I broke down and cried again just moments ago, but I didn't get to let all the tears out (it would have been too loud). This just bothers me again and I wish I had a concrete answer to this.

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