disarm_1 Posted August 27, 2009 Posted August 27, 2009 THE EX!!! i was returning a book at school. As I was walking out she was walking in. I saw her first and I swear i took a step back and I thought about ducking in to the restroom and hiding! I decide to keep walking and then she saw me too. She had a shocked look on her face. Then she smiled and asked me what I was doing. And that's when I froze. I looked straight down to the ground and just mumbled "I was returning a book". I literally mumbled. It was pathetic. I'm sure she barely heard me. She said she had to run because class was starting. I kept staring down and nodded my head. I took a step forward and she said bye, again I just stared down and nodded my head. That was it. I feel so strange now. It was not what I expected for our first post break up encounter. I barely spoke, I couldn't look at her in the eye, and the whole time i was turned to the side. I didn't even face her. The thing that surprised me the most was that when she spoke I didn't recognize her voice! I was so used to hearing her voice daily for 3yrs. it's been almost a month since I heard her voice and it sounded strange. It didn't sound familiar. I'm a bit in shock right now. I can't really say what my feelings are at the moment.
Lish Posted August 27, 2009 Posted August 27, 2009 Sounds like quite an awkward moment. Why couldn't you look at her though?
Author disarm_1 Posted August 27, 2009 Author Posted August 27, 2009 You know i have no idea! As soon as we went our separate ways I wondered the same thing. Maybe cause she had a huge smile on her face and I didn't wanna look at her and have those feelings of wanting her back start coming up again. The thing about not recognizing her voice freaked me out too. I had pretty much forgotten what she sounded like. It just hit me that my life has totally changed in the past few weeks. Everything that was so familiar is gone. Another reason might be that I'm a naturally shy person. Really shy. The thing i loved about her is that from the day i met her i was comfortable around her. She made me feel at ease. Now I've lost trust in her and I felt like i had my guard up. Could be a combination of those, or could be another reason I haven't thought of. I wish I wouldn't have done it that way though.
Lish Posted August 27, 2009 Posted August 27, 2009 Sounds to me like the reason you broke up came flooding back and that it's had a bigger impact on you than it has on her. Could be that or as you said, you've lost trust and therefore felt guarded around her. The shock could be from the contrast in how she used to make you feel (at ease) and how uncomfortable and guarded you seemed to be when you got back in her presence. I also think that it's only been a month... so it's still quite raw. Didn't seem that way with her though as she paraded round with a massive smile on her face. Don't wish you reacted differently though.. she's an ex - who cares? Lets hope you don't run into her again anytime soon, huh?
Author disarm_1 Posted August 27, 2009 Author Posted August 27, 2009 Well, I'm sure it's had just as big of an impact on her as it has on me. The difference is that she's doing what make her happy, while I'm having to do something that I didn't want to do. She also moves on quicker than I do. Even during our relationship. We'd argue and while i might still be stuck on it a day after she's gotten over it and is ready to move on. Yes! hope it doesn't happen anytime soon anymore! I've been wanting to see her but after today I don't want to anymore. It just delays getting over her and who likes awkward moments?
nomoregummybears Posted August 27, 2009 Posted August 27, 2009 You'll be fine, buddy. It'll take time, but the awkwardness will go away. Just don't think about it too, much.
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