DustySaltus Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Got a story to tell.... About ten years ago I met my ex fiance at a summer camp in NY. She is Israeli and I am American. We had a summer fling but she was my first love...I went away to school, she went back to Israel.....fast forward 8 years. I was on facebook one day and saw her as a "recommended friend" so I added her and we started having casual conversations for a few months, which led to phone calls and eventually me deciding that I wanted to visit there. At first it was for about 10 days, just to see the country and see her for a day or two. Well, I wound up staying at her place for about 3 weeks. About 4 days into the visit we got into a huge fight when she overheard me on the phone telling my friend that I was missing home a little bit....she told me that the entire thing was a mistake and told me to leave. Went to the airport, AT THE GATE....call her to say goodbye for good, she tells me NOT to gte on the plane. 2 hours and 400 angry passengers later, I hop in a cab back to the house. For the rest of the vacation everything was EXCELLENT and we addressed everything. She then came to NY for a month....... One again everything was great for the first few days...but she started to check my phone and questioned me about who female colleagues were...she walked out on me in the middle of dinner because of this. At this point I told her to pack her stuff and leave, I've had enough. She looked at me and told me....."You will be my Husband"...I just laughed and looked at her like she was crazy. We fot home, she started packing and once I heard that last zip of the bag, something came over me and I told her that I wanted her to stay. From that moment forward the rest of the trip was excellent..I mean she is a great woman, beautiful, smart and hilarious. The highs were the highest I ever had and the lows were the lowest. We went back and forth to visit each other a few times until the decision was made that I would move to Israel for various reasons that made sense with her at the time, but i can't really talk about. I was all set to quit my job, but in this economy and our turbulent history I decided to take a Leave of Absence instead, just in case something happened. We had an agreement that in one year if I was offered my dream job in America, we would consider moving back...more on this later. So I moved to Israel, went through the entire process of obtaining citizenship and the whole nine yards. Started looking for work over there and that was a job in its self, plus the salaries are not comparable to the US. It kind of had me down, because I wanted to be the MAN and contribute, but without knowing the language right away my immediate options were limited. In the meanwhile things with us were great, we really got to know each other a lot better and would stop disagreements right away before the escalated. We really learned from our mistakes. Then I received a call from that job a lot earlier than expected, they needed me in NY in one week. At this point she became different and told me that she didn't see herself moving in the next year if at all. I was devastated...I need to choose between a career and the woman of my dreams. I needed to make this decision in the next few days. Well, as it turns out she was checking my emails for a few weeks. She knew I hadn't quit my job and read emails to my mother saying that I was "thinking" (again, keyword "thinking") about maybe coming back. However, I was still in Israel trying to fight my way through things and breakthrough that initial culture shock. I asked her how she knew my password and she said that my computer was open. So when she left for work I sent an email to my friend on purpose saying..."im coming back tomorrrow:...well about an hour later she came back from work and told me to pack up and leave. She took my key, told me she never wanted to speak with me again and told me that she would send emails to both my job and dream job to tell them what kind of person I "really was". And I was just about to call my job and quit for good and put an end to any questions. Well, at that point I just got back on a plane to america. It turns out that she did send an email to my boss trying to get me fired. She won't give me the ring back and lied about sending it back in the mail a few times but the "address was wrong". She also told me that she was seeing someone else that treated her better than I ever did (and that was one week after I left..does this guy exist?!?!). I've been back for a few weeks now and am trying to figure out if this is really the end, considering all that has occured. Love is illogical sometimes and I know I should probably just move on, but at the same time I have no doubt that she was the love of my life. What should I do?
Exit Posted July 20, 2009 Posted July 20, 2009 Sounds like a freaking psycho!!!!!!! So incredibly jealous. And on top of that, you were willing to move there for her, but when the tables were turned, she "couldn't see herself moving". Yes love can be illogical but this is beyond that. In all the threads I've read at the forums, this is the most clear case of someone who dodged a bullet and just needs to realize it!! Open your eyes and realize that kind of jealousy is not acceptable! She has ISSUES!
Author DustySaltus Posted July 20, 2009 Author Posted July 20, 2009 The biggest question I had is why we just didn't sit down and talk things out? She kicked me out and threatened me and then ridiculed me for leaving the country so quickly..I mean after those threats, why would I think she wanted me to stay. But now a few weeks from the incident, I miss her and think that all could have been avoided if we communicated a little better
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