allina Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 This is a spin off from JS's post. I think it's only fair that women get to discuss what's a deal breaker for them while dating. Clearly abusive, a-hole is a deal breaker for everyone (well most) so I won't bother listing the really obvious stuff. For me- -guy who cries -broke -unemployed -ugly -stupid -uneducated -lives with his parents -religious -anti gay marriage -spits -hunts -can't drive -can't fix/do something simple like change the oil in his car or put together an ikea bookshelf Ok maybe not a huge deal breaker but a guy who can't do simple stuff with his hands is a HUGE turn off -watches too much tv -sounds ghetto/like a hick when he speaks -has kids -writes poetry/too "sensitive" -doesn't care about animals
Ocean-Blue Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Has a chip on his shoulder and thinks the world owes him something. I can befriend a man like this and be there for him, but I can't see myself being in a relationship with such a man. Thinks his mommy knows everything and refuses to be objective when it comes to his family (even in the face of contrary evidence). Is sexually closed-minded or conservative (feels "guilty" about masturbating, is conflicted about oral sex, etc). Doesn't want kids. Has bad teeth. Humourless (can't poke fun at himself; wound too tight). Is needier than me.
kashmir Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 I nodded in agreement until I came to this: -writes poetry/too "sensitive" I'm just wondering...I can understand too sensitive, but writes poetry? I write poetry...songs mostly, and a few really pissed off spoken-word social & political commentary stuff that I'll do at slams every now and then. Does that make me too sensitive?
Trialbyfire Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Haha allina....I started a thread like this three times yesterday, then shut down the window and said, nah, forget about it!! Okay, to add to it a little: Victim mentality Stupid Extremist/fundamentalist/misogynist Stupid Crude/rude (you can get your point across using other words) Stupid Drama queen Stupid Incapable of free thinking Stupid Neo/paleo-con Stupid Segregationalist Stupid White supremist And did I say...stupid?
D-Lish Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 I nodded in agreement until I came to this: I'm just wondering...I can understand too sensitive, but writes poetry? I write poetry...songs mostly, and a few really pissed off spoken-word social & political commentary stuff that I'll do at slams every now and then. Does that make me too sensitive? No.... It makes you a rockstar. I'd do John Mayer.... But the big deal breaker for me is ear-hair.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Haha allina....I started a thread like this three times yesterday, then shut down the window and said, nah, forget about it!! Okay, to add to it a little: Victim mentality Stupid Extremist/fundamentalist/misogynist Stupid Crude/rude (you can get your point across using other words) Stupid Drama queen Stupid Incapable of free thinking Stupid Neo/paleo-con Stupid Segregationalist Stupid White supremist And did I say...stupid? :lmao:
johan Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 I can't stand bad eating habits in someone I date. It turns me off to the point that I can't date them.
amaysngrace Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Thinks what he owns is all he's worth. Shallow. Poor conversationalist. Lacks understanding and curiousity. Watches sports like he's the paid athlete. Is unkind. Is unclean. Is selfish. Lacks character. Lacks morals. Lacks intelligence. Lacks creativity. Lacks looks. Lacks style. Lacks strong family ties and friendships. Oh and has a little pecker.
Angel1111 Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 1. Axe murderer 2. Not intelligent 3. No sense of humor 4. Acts like he has a cork up his b--t 5. Can't handle money 6. Can't make money 7. 5 or more years younger than me 8. No drive 9. Hot temper 10. Not generous 11. Overly judgemental 12. No social skills 13. Whiney 14. Weak 15. Lies 16. Low standards 17. Controlling 18. Nagging / Preachy 19. Self-righteous 20. Disrespectful 21. Consistently Unhappy
Ocean-Blue Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Watches sports like he's the paid athlete. I love this one! I know an idiot or two that are like this.
Author allina Posted November 19, 2008 Author Posted November 19, 2008 I nodded in agreement until I came to this: I'm just wondering...I can understand too sensitive, but writes poetry? I write poetry...songs mostly, and a few really pissed off spoken-word social & political commentary stuff that I'll do at slams every now and then. Does that make me too sensitive? Ok let me explain that a little more. I think it's pretty cool that you write songs and do spoken word. The reason I said the poetry thing is because from my experience guys who wrote poetry, and told me about it, and showed me their poetry were such whiny sissies The poems were always super cliche and sad, and whiny, and just pathetic and sad. These were also the guys who start to open up too much, then cry after you've shared a few pints Now I'm not emotionally dead or anything but this just makes me uncomfortable with a hint of annoyed.
alphamale Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 -writes poetry/too "sensitive" -doesn't care about animals so you want a sensitive card-carrying member of the ASPCA but who doesn't write poetry?? is that right? since most women "want it all" maybe you should just say he should be perfect in every way possible AND have a white horse
Ocean-Blue Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Ok let me explain that a little more. I think it's pretty cool that you write songs and do spoken word. The reason I said the poetry thing is because from my experience guys who wrote poetry, and told me about it, and showed me their poetry were such whiny sissies The poems were always super cliche and sad, and whiny, and just pathetic and sad. These were also the guys who start to open up too much, then cry after you've shared a few pints Now I'm not emotionally dead or anything but this just makes me uncomfortable with a hint of annoyed. I am not a big fan of the crying man either. It makes me mucho uncomfortable...I don't know whether to hug him or feign concern and pat his back. Either way, I have to force myself NOT to slap him back to reality.
amaysngrace Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 No.... It makes you a rockstar. Exactly. I don't call songwriting writing poetry. Whole different animal.
kashmir Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Ok let me explain that a little more. I think it's pretty cool that you write songs and do spoken word. The reason I said the poetry thing is because from my experience guys who wrote poetry, and told me about it, and showed me their poetry were such whiny sissies The poems were always super cliche and sad, and whiny, and just pathetic and sad. These were also the guys who start to open up too much, then cry after you've shared a few pints Now I'm not emotionally dead or anything but this just makes me uncomfortable with a hint of annoyed. Well say that then and don't generalize by saying poetry! =p But I get what you mean. Your hair is like a butterfly Your eyes They're like Venus In the morrow's sky
Touche Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 1. Moody 2. Self-centered 3. Has kids (ok, that used to be a deal-breaker for me but then I fell in love with my H who had a kid..) 4. Not a gentleman 5. No class 6. Whiner/victim mentality 9. Impolite and inconsiderate 10. Uneducated and ignorant 11. Fat
Author allina Posted November 19, 2008 Author Posted November 19, 2008 so you want a sensitive card-carrying member of the ASPCA but who doesn't write poetry?? is that right? since most women "want it all" maybe you should just say he should be perfect in every way possible AND have a white horse That makes no sense, men can care about animals and love their pets while not being over sensitive sissies I have met plenty and I actually don't think the two are similar/related. And I'm not saying anything about him needing to be perfect. I am not a big fan of the crying man either. It makes me mucho uncomfortable...I don't know whether to hug him or feign concern and pat his back. Either way, I have to force myself NOT to slap him back to reality. :laugh: Yeah for me all attraction just goes out the window. Of course I'm not speaking about tragic events like a death.
johan Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 I find it encouraging that none of you have listed bitterness, lots of baggage, or uncontrollable sweating as deal breakers.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 :laugh: Yeah for me all attraction just goes out the window. Of course I'm not speaking about tragic events like a death. Yup. I think it's sweet when you are witness to an otherwise stoic/together/composed man shed a tear (you know, when he remembers a specific part of his childhood, or mourns the loss of a friend). Guys who cry while watching chick flicks are the worst. I have a friend who bawled his eyes out during the Titanic.
immizunderstood Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Has new money attitude Low vocabulary Unclean/Unkept Feels superior to women Arrogant/Condescending Flamboyant Insensitive Unspiritual Doesn't enjoy the simple things Makes fun of people who do enjoy the simple things Humorless Mr. Know It All Unappreciative Hates to try new things Never apologizes Dishonest and last but not least A Man Whore!
Touche Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Oh I just wanted to add these others that I left off before: 1. Bitterness 2. Baggage (other than having kids) 3. Uncontrollable sweating 4. Cheapskate or just generally bad with money management.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Oh I just wanted to add these others that I left off before: 1. Bitterness 2. Baggage (other than having kids) 3. Uncontrollable sweating 4. Cheapskate or just generally bad with money management. Totally agree about the baggage n' bitterness.
BubblyPopcorn Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 uncontrollable sweating as deal breakers. Oops that used to be one of mine, those little armpitty stains but my feet get sweaty sometimes so it's a fair trade
DollWelch Posted November 19, 2008 Posted November 19, 2008 Deal Breakers: Rich and good looking. -and Phd educated. I am not a big fan of the crying man either. It makes me mucho uncomfortable...I don't know whether to hug him or feign concern and pat his back. Either way, I have to force myself NOT to slap him back to reality.
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