Based on what's presented-What is on this woman’s mind II.

[Sears]

What is on this woman’s mind II.

 

This is kind of a follow up to my other thread listed here

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t154744/

 

Shortly after this thread and my other thread, this lady started acting a little flakey. Longer durations between texts and such, I know her division is bogged down with an impossible project that my division may have to work on.

 

So I put this on the project. Then, she started to flake on date attempts. She mentioned her work and such so I ¾ ways believed that. I asked her what she would like to do and she said it would be decided on how her day went. I noticed her tone seemed a little more tense towards me. Finally, I see what she wants to do. She was tense again so I told her she doesn’t have to go out if she doesn’t want to and if she wants to not see me that’s ok. I wanted this out there because I was in the process of making travel plans and didn’t want a flake when there is airfare out there and such.

 

A few hours later, she replies that she wanted to see me in person but she can’t do anything more with me now. I took it and said ok and said my standard line that I understand and maybe we can be friends.

 

I asked what was up and her reply was nothing and I was everything a woman could want and she was crazy. I took this as her not feeling a spark or what she thought was a spark.

 

To shield myself, I started going out with folks I put off while going out with her. A few days ago, I get a real late text about my birthday and so on.

 

We had a talk not long before about interest levels and so on, I mentioned I pull back when I feel something strange, her retort was a sharp “see, that’s what I’m talking about”

 

Flash forward…Our company had an all hands meeting in her new building across town. I wondered if she would be there so(we work together) so I checked her outlook and knew she would be in the meeting.

 

I get there to find her all decked out in all the blue stuff she had in her closet. My favorite BTW…She kept looking at me and looking down kind of smiling but looking at me to see if I was smiling at her(before the flake, when I saw her, she was pizzed that I didn’t smile at her. I think this is how she gauged how I felt).

Later, her texts start up as they did before the alleged flake.

 

My question based on what I’ve presented here, what is up on her pull back break up etc? My theories are:

1.Scared because she thought we were heading to relationshipville.(she has a bad break up history with guys and I’ve been cheated on a couple times)

2.Not feeling a spark.

3.A female friend said she may not think she’s good enough for a slob like me(esteem issues are there)

4.The same female friend postulated she may have made a pre-emptive break up thinking I was going to do her because of my pull back.

5.none of the above please fill in the blanks

 

Secondary question:

What was up with all the blue stuff on knowing it’s my color and the “test texts” sent.

My answers to her text were kind of not where they would have been in the past. Her answers to my questions in the past were designed for me to ask more questions or engage her more.

 

I’m kind of out there dating others again but she is still in my head. I was planning to check back with her in August once our fiscal year ends.

[MadDog]

You should stop wasting your time with this woman. She clearly has issues whether they are baggage from previous relationships, insecurity, emotional instability, etc. It doesn't really matter what the reason is that she acts this way, you're much better of finding someone else who won't be so unreliable.

 

MD

[Sears]

Based on the above from MadDog and her not wanting to "do anything more with me now", I left this lady alone and went back to my regularly scheduled program(continued going out with women I kind of side burnered while I was going out with her). A few days ago, we had a meeting in her building but I saw she wouldn’t be in it. That was good.

 

 

I was walking to the conference room with a lady friend(just a friend) when we bumped into her. She looked at me and appeared surprised, looked at me and said hi to which I responded. She then looked at my friend and gave her the ugliest catty look in the world. I thought it was my imagination but the lady noticed it and asked if we were dating or something. I told her we were “going out(what does going out mean by the way, these were her words).

A couple days later, she starts texting again. Unlike when we were going out, I didn’t respond for a couple hours.

 

Two reasons, I was training someone and two…well I was being a punk. She started asking how was I doing and about our favorite show. I responded that I was great and asked how was she doing. She said “OK” which in the past I would have asked why just OK. I really didn’t this time and she stopped the text chain.

 

 

Now, I bump into her best friend who for some reason, I have a feeling she doesn’t know we aren’t “going out” anymore. Strange…Flash forward to this weekend. Myself and a date were heading out for the evening and hit a main street near me. Who do I see driving up it…this lady… She lives 20 miles from me and I don’t THINK has a reason to be around my area however her course takes her right past my favorite watering hole.

 

 

The night before on MySpace I said I would be heading up there for a drink or two and pool.Assuming she doesn’t have reason to be in my area, what can I make of this development and the texts if anything? IF she wanted to stop through, she could have called.

[FlyByNite]

Honestly? My reading of this is that she likes the attention from you, but isn't prepared to actually have a relationship with you. She's engaging your interest by flirting, which boosts her ego, but then pulling back when she sees that you might pursue her seriously. You don't need this and deserve better. Good luck.