lambda Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I've fallen for a girl but I don't know if she feels the same. What makes me unsure is that she has a boyfriend, and the fact that I saw one of the other guys at work giving her a hug (or a little kiss, I don't know). She is popular at the office and the other guys seem to be flirting with her, but most of it is innocent (except for the hug/kiss). I haven't seen her flirting back really, but she is a girl with a great mood so she is always happy. The reason I think I might stand a chance with her is that for the two-week period I've worked at the office she has given quite some signs she's interested when we talk. She touches me in different ways (we touch everyday in one way or another, usually just a "accidentally" brush, or that she leans into me or I lean into her), and its ok for her if I touch her. She sometimes plays with her jewelry when we talk, dresses up, ask personal questions (if i have a girlfriend, children, how i live), always happy and smiling, checks out my body, has given me a nickname, imitates my dialect, looks at me every now and then, we sit/stand close, and so on. I don't know much about her relationship with her boyfriend other than that they have been together for several years. It could be a dying relationship. When it comes to the guy at the office I'm more concerned. In the start I noticed nothing special between them. He's also 10 years older than her and has a girlfriend. But the hug/kiss concerns me. She gave him a snack to appreciate him as a good coworker, and he thanked her with a hug or kiss. But the problem is that I didn't see it cleary what happened as I entered her office right when it happened and left immediately. IF it was a hug or a kiss, could this mean that they have something going on? Or could it just be friendly?
mortensorchid Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Sounds like a tease. If she has a bf already then she's just teasing you. You'll get hurt in the end here.
Trialbyfire Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Ah yes, the office flirt/tramp. The more men to validate her, the bigger her ego stroke! Ask yourself why you're so interested in her since you barely know her. Is it possible it's a guy competition thing, winning the trophy?
Author lambda Posted July 13, 2008 Author Posted July 13, 2008 Well, she praise me all the time and give me compliments, so its more like she is validating me than the opposite. I don't give her much compliments, but I show enthusiasm in our conversations (as she do), and try to have fun. Its not a "winning the throphy" thing. I immediately felt a connection/attraction with her. We share the same interests and same humor. Her looks (body) are slightly below my standards, but she is an outgoing and nice girl and it more than weighs up for it. I don't get the impression she's a player.. But it could be she's looking for a new boyfriend? It happens all the time, relationships end because people meet new people.. Anyway, what can I do to find out of her intentions? I'm not going to stay at this job for very long, so i don't need to be afraid of spoiling our co-worker relationship.
backto1 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Why not leave the girl alone and find one without a boyfriend? Don't be a dick.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Well, she praise me all the time and give me compliments, so its more like she is validating me than the opposite. I don't give her much compliments, but I show enthusiasm in our conversations (as she do), and try to have fun. Its not a "winning the throphy" thing. I immediately felt a connection/attraction with her. We share the same interests and same humor. Her looks (body) are slightly below my standards, but she is an outgoing and nice girl and it more than weighs up for it. I don't get the impression she's a player.. But it could be she's looking for a new boyfriend? It happens all the time, relationships end because people meet new people.. Anyway, what can I do to find out of her intentions? I'm not going to stay at this job for very long, so i don't need to be afraid of spoiling our co-worker relationship. Hey if I see a cute guy, I could say " Omg you're so cute!!!" but doesn't necessary mean that I want to start hooking up with him. It's a compliment and nothing else. You're looking way too much into this. Why would you want to start flirting and dating a girl who has a bf? At least wait until she's single. If she's flirting with other guy's in the office, most likely she's a flirt, and you can't take her seriously.
saraispiel19 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 She likes the attention from other males thats all, sorry your nothing special to her, not even her boyfriend is by the way she's acting.
silvergirl Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Never, I repeat NEVER fall for someone, let alone get involved with someone you work with, it will not turn out well. Also, this girl sounds like she feeds on the attention of as many men as she can in the office. Beware of these types. I promise you, she's just a tease.
thebrunette Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I agree with everyone above in that she is seeking attention and it's probably not so much about validating you as you say, but about validating herself in her own mind. I'd avoid entering into anything with her or even entertaining ideas of it in your head because I think it's more a power issue than anything and she is also not single. She may be very nice but just leave it well alone. Besides, would you want a girlfriend who flirts with and touches all the guys in her office?
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