Jane T Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 This just dawned on me for some reason, but I'd like to know if they'd make a difference in whether you'd be willing to initiate activities after this. Also, would you accept invitations from this girl? These aren't in order. Scenario 1: You and the girl go out on a first date and things go okay. The girl says that she'll call you if she wants to do it again. She finally calls a week later and says that she wants to go to a concert two weeks later. You're like "two weeks?!" but calm down and say okay. It ends up being another week after that, but that's your fault this time. You, your best friend, and the girl end up going to the concert. Afterwards, you and the best friend have planned to take the girl to a bar. When you ask her after the concert, she says she "has to go home." You both ask several times, but she's adamant. You don't speak to her the rest of the way back to her car, but you do finally say goodbye. Scenario 2: You've planned a party at your house for your staff, several coworkers, and your family. You send out a general email with the girl's name first, and later ask her specifically if she's coming. She says she is. Then she texts you at the last minute to say she's not coming after all, but doesn't apologize. Scenario 3: You and the girl go hang out and have a great time. This time she does agree to go somewhere with you and a mutual friend afterwards (the mutual friend is your ex fwb from several years ago, and an old coworker of both of you. You don't know she knows the girl is your ex fwb.) A few days later, you all get together again. First, the ex fwb spills the beans on your old (month-long) "relationship." Then, the girl says she can't date because of the new religion she's converting to. Then the girl implies she's bi. Then the girl grills you to find out who else you both know that you've slept with. You're not feeling well on top of it. You and the girl leave furious with each other, but are speaking to each other again within a few days. Scenario 4: You, the girl, and your staff go to a concert. You see a friend and go talk to them for a while. When you get back, the girl's furious and won't speak to you for the rest of the night.
kikiD Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 CUCKOO BIRD! get out this dramatic mess while it's easy!
Author Jane T Posted November 6, 2007 Author Posted November 6, 2007 CUCKOO BIRD! get out this dramatic mess while it's easy! You mean the girl, right?
finallyhappyme Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 So she's bi, converting to a religion that doesn't let her date, and furious at your for no apparent reason? Why do you want her again?
kikiD Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 You mean the girl, right? ABSOLUTELY! Of course, if one continues to pursue her for a relationship, I might count that person as the crazier of them all!
Blue Eyed Brain Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 The girl is not worth pursuing. The man should cut his losses and run for the hills when he sees her.
Krytie TV Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 This post reeks of "one side of the story"ness
finallyhappyme Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 This post reeks of "one side of the story"ness oh yeah that too.
Kamille Posted November 6, 2007 Posted November 6, 2007 This post reeks of "one side of the story"ness except that I think the OP is the girl trying to get the guy's point of view. See her other posts.
Timberlane Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 The girl is not worth pursuing. The man should cut his losses and run for the hills when he sees her. I nearly puked reading all of that! Do what these women say. Run!!!!!
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 Ok, that was a pretty strong reaction from everyone Since the girl's actions were that horrendous, why would the guy even bother accepting her invitations? (I assume that everyone's saying that they wouldn't invite the girl anywhere after these things.)
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 What the F?!! Care to be a bit more specific?
isntitironic Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? DO YOU HAVE ANY SELF RESPECT? Rough upbringing? work it out with your head before this deuchbag
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 Sorry, I'm a bit slow this morning. Do you mean the guy has no self respect, the girl has no self respect, that I as the OP have no self respect, or something else?
dbtmarley Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 Is this one girl or 4 girls? If it's 4 I wouldn't talk to any of them.
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 Isntitironic, I'll assume then that you had trouble understanding the thread. Really, there was no reason to post in the thread if you didn't understand it. If that's not what you're getting at, feel free to reply.
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 Is this one girl or 4 girls? If it's 4 I wouldn't talk to any of them. Just one girl. Is it four times as bad, then? By the way, you really think that the first two were awful? I would have said just the last two. What was so bad about the girl in the first two scenarios?
compassion42 Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 Wow-this is really confusing....what guy are we talking about? I thought all the players in these scenarios were girls???
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 Wow-this is really confusing....what guy are we talking about? I thought all the players in these scenarios were girls??? The scenarios are meant to be written from the guy's perspective. I can see how it could be confusing, especially since my member name is a girl's name. My question is if a guy had all of these experiences with a girl, would he normally still ask her out, wait to be asked out, or run as fast as possible in the other direction? (Everyone seems to be leaning towards running so far but I'd be grateful for your opinion as well.) The followup question is if the guy's still sticking around and accepting invitations from the girl, what could the guy possibly be thinkng?
dbtmarley Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 Just one girl. Is it four times as bad, then? Well any problem with a girl is usually magnified times 5. So I would say 20 times as bad. Seriously though, this girl would only be an acquaintance.... and even that would be shaky...
MR2Aaron Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 Number 4 seems rude on your part, leaving your date alone or with your friends who she doesn't know to go talk to some random people. I'd probably forgive her for that one. For the rest, though, I might give her a second chance after any one of those, but not after two.
Author Jane T Posted November 7, 2007 Author Posted November 7, 2007 I'll concede #4 also. But what's so bad about #1? Isn't that partially the guy's fault for not telling her in advance that he really wanted her to go to this bar afterwards? Or should she have been available until a decent hour (midnight-ish) once they made plans at all? Or is the problem really that the girl, who said she'd call for the second date, left a three-week gap between the 1st and second dates?
MR2Aaron Posted November 7, 2007 Posted November 7, 2007 I'll concede #4 also. But what's so bad about #1? Isn't that partially the guy's fault for not telling her in advance that he really wanted her to go to this bar afterwards? Or should she have been available until a decent hour (midnight-ish) once they made plans at all? Or is the problem really that the girl, who said she'd call for the second date, left a three-week gap between the 1st and second dates? It's a combination. Not as big a deal as the other two, but still... Who brings their friends on a date, anyway? Third wheel much?
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