RocketMan2 Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Ha. I still don't believe this.... A made a post a few days ago (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t109971/) which some of you guys helped me out with, thanks for all the kind words. In summary, I had some of my exes things that she wanted back, but she also wanted money that i owed her £50 ($100). So i wrote her a cheque and dropped it off at hers, along with a few bits and bobs. I thought that was a small price to pay for peace. I couldnt be bothered to argue. Anyway, in amongst the stuff was a receipt for some jewellery id got her for xmas (£160, $320), so that she had proof of purchase to get the insurance id told her about. Anyway i get a text today saying "i cant return that jewellery, cos you paid on your card will you do it for me i really need the money". WHAT A B*TCH!! OH MY GOD.!!!!! Can you believe this broad!??!? I'm so mad. So. SO SOOOO MAD. Will someone tell me this dreadful person is a golddigging... i cant even describe her. Im in denial. How do you completely not see a side of a persons character. Im cancelling that cheque first thing in the morning. Am i overreacting here? Im not am i? Im completely over her now. What a completly unscrupulous, inconsiderate...^$"£%^"£!!!!! I had this text written to send to her, because i really dont think this is clear in her pathetic, immature brain of hers... K, i dont know what happened to the kind, sensitive person i fell in love with but im sorry shes gone and even more sorry if i drove her away. I und erstand perfectly that you feel you have lots of your life ahead of you, but so have i even though you dont think so. Im only sorry that you thought id hold you down, rather than build you up and inspire you. You made your choice and removed me from your life, so stop going back on it and involving youself with me. Please stop contacting me for good. If money is more important to you than my clearly meaningless xmas gifts then ebay them. I gave you the receipt to get the insurance if you wanted to, as i promised i would. Im glad your grandads ok (he was in hosipital) and your exams went well. Goodbye, A. (I know that says a few things foreign to this thread, but they are final words i need to get off my chest if im gonna send it at all) ARGGGGG Thoughts?
norajane Posted January 21, 2007 Posted January 21, 2007 Noooooo. Don't cancel the check. But don't send her any texts or emails or anything! Just completely and totally drop off the face of the earth. Do NOT have any more contact with her of any kind. Your text is too wimpy anyway. Why would you apologize for anything? You don't really believe YOU drove her away or that you turned her into a mercenary bitch? Why discuss anything? You can't honestly believe it matters to her what you say! You're just a way to get money at this point. Why haven't you blocked her out of your life? What are you waiting for? NO CONTACT means NO contact.
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 22, 2007 Author Posted January 22, 2007 I cant block her texts or calls can i? Can you do that in the UK? You couldnt last time i tried..
whichwayisup Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 Ignore her. Make it seem she's dead in your eyes (and eventually your heart will catch up)! She's a fool. Change your cell phone #, delete her from your IM/Email list and block her there.
norajane Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 I cant block her texts or calls can i? Can you do that in the UK? You couldnt last time i tried.. You can delete her messages without reading them, and you don't have to answer her calls. EVER. Or, as whichwayisup suggests, you can change your number.
Tony T Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 This ex of yours is a low class scumbag. I want to puke...that's throw up, vomit or regurgitate in the U.S. What you ought to do is have the money put back on your credit card and just keep it.
Tormented Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 Wow! That's incredibly callous and ignorant on her side! Isn't it amazing how we don't REALLY know our exes until AFTER we break up with them?? I hope you cut this one loose for good and NEVER look back. ~T~
D-Lish Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 I wouldn't even bother responding to her in a text, e-mail, or phone call. She isn't worth it. Your silence will say everything you need to say. Just delete her texts- and ignore her if she contacts you. That's such a crappy thing to do...so inconsiderate.
shockandawed Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 Rocket, Next time you get sentimental about her, focus on this last act. Absolutely no excuse for her actions on this. I agree with everyone else, just don't respond at all. You took the high road with the check. Screw her. NO RESPONSE!!!!
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 22, 2007 Author Posted January 22, 2007 Your text is too wimpy anyway. Why would you apologize for anything? You don't really believe YOU drove her away or that you turned her into a mercenary bitch? Why discuss anything? You can't honestly believe it matters to her what you say! You're just a way to get money at this point. I know, i was a bit emotional when i wrote it. I guess i just cant accept that someone can be so two faced. 'Was maybe just hoping that shed feel bad in even the slightest way. Lol yeah right. Wow! That's incredibly callous and ignorant on her side! Isn't it amazing how we don't REALLY know our exes until AFTER we break up with them?? I wouldn't even bother responding to her in a text, e-mail, or phone call. She isn't worth it. Your silence will say everything you need to say. Just delete her texts- and ignore her if she contacts you. That's such a crappy thing to do...so inconsiderate. Thanks guys, im glad im not the only one who thinks this. Rocket, Next time you get sentimental about her, focus on this last act.<snip />Screw her. NO RESPONSE!!!! Damn straight. Thanks everyone WHAT A B*TCH!!!!
lovelorcet Posted January 22, 2007 Posted January 22, 2007 Hey, man! Like the others said you gave her the 50 and the rest is her problem. You are off the hook now so IGNORE HER! Also, I think it is great that you post what you want to send her first and get some feedback here. Now stop thinking about this freaky b*tch and get out there and start to have some fun. There are better things to do now than waste your time pining over this chick.
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 22, 2007 Author Posted January 22, 2007 Right now is the first time i've actually felt normal for like a month. Its such a nice feeling to not be depressed! ahhhhhhhhhhh so happy I've actually got a real smile on. Thanks guys for the tremendous support. I could definately not have done it without you guys
johnnytable Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 You wouldn't be going through this if you had blocked her earlier (ie deleting texts without reading them). Don't worry about this because you are learning an important lesson. Now ask yourself, where do you want to be next time this happens? What will you do? I would consider going NC with this person. She is not good for you. However this has to be your decision, not mine!
princessa Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 I told you not to give her more money, next time listen to me! Anyway don't beat yourself up over it, just ignore her and be done with it. You'll be angry for a while but eventually anger will subside and you will be so glad to be rid of her.
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 23, 2007 Author Posted January 23, 2007 I told you not to give her more money, next time listen to me! Anyway don't beat yourself up over it, just ignore her and be done with it. You'll be angry for a while but eventually anger will subside and you will be so glad to be rid of her. Hehe, Thanks princessa, I'm not so much angry any more, in a way, im glad she did this because its accelerated my healing fantastically. I again feel pretty good today, a few passing thoughts but im managing to easilly brush them off at the moment! Im sure she'll ruin it this afternoon though
NearlyThere Posted January 23, 2007 Posted January 23, 2007 I cant block her texts or calls can i? Can you do that in the UK? You couldnt last time i tried.. Im in the UK and a friend of mine has got a certain make of phone (dont know if I'm allowed to mention it on here) and I know for def, you can block texts from certain people on it, dont know about the calls, might mean changing phones and/or provider though. PM me if you want to know the make of phone.
mental_traveller Posted January 24, 2007 Posted January 24, 2007 Don't cancel your cheque. A debt is a debt, even if you hate who you owe it to, you're legally and honour bound to pay back your debts. As for the rest - yeah she's a selfish gold-digger. Either ignore her or reply "You've got to be kidding. Please don't contact me again." and move on with your life.
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 28, 2007 Author Posted January 28, 2007 Well its been a week of NC, and its also the 1 month anniversairy of our break up. Man do i feel bad today I can't even put my finger on what im feeling. Its just a funny feeling in my chest. I keep remembering little things she used to do. I was in the gym yesterday and its always full of old grannies. There was one girl in there and it reminded me so much of my ex because she always used to be the only young/fit person in there She didnt even look slightly like her. This sounds stupid but i kept thinking about my ex's mannerisms, like the way she used to walk over to me with a cheeky swing/skip in her hips. This girl wasnt even doing that. Even things which ARENT a reflection of my ex remind me of her ((( This little girl came up to me in the pub the other day too, and it reminded me of my ex's little sister who used to adore me. That just reminded me of how my ex used to play with her, and the cute things she used to say to her. Maybe im thinking of that because it was the only person she was allowed to give that so much attention to apart from me (which tbh she never really did!) God I'm just so jealous. Thats what it is. Shes absolutely gorgeous and will have men falling at her feet for her to choose from. I know i've got a couple of people in the pipeline with not much effort, but i cant really give myself any credit for it, i dont know why. The jealously is overriding everything. Even if it wasnt though im not sure id give myself credit, id just call it luck or whatever. Why do i think so low of myself? Im gonna say something now ive never said to anyone before really, so please take this seriously guys its a big thing for me... I think a lot of my problems stem from the fact that i used to be bullied quite a bit at school. I know i brought most of it on myself though, not that anyone deserves to be bullied, but i was a bit of an antisocial geek. I dont know why, i didnt mean to be, i cant even really remember why id have taken that route. Its not happened for years, i mean im a postgrad now with a job and life, its not the playground any more, but it still bothers me. Do you think i should see someone about it? I feel so embarassed about it. It really affects everything in my life, i think thats why im kinda shy and why i get so attached to the things i love. i've always known it just never admitted it. I live in a big city, but everyone seems to know everyone else, so theres no escaping people or memories from my past. I think thats what making me extra jealous, because my ex is probably going to get with someone that used to....... i dont even want to finish that sentence. Im sure you can work out what i was gonna say. I feel so pathetic for letting something so trivial and from so long ago have such a control over me. What a rant At least ive let it out. I must sound really messed up lol. Rocket
Sup Posted January 28, 2007 Posted January 28, 2007 Nah, not really. You said her younger sister is in ya? Depending on the age..... I'm not saying anything serious, of course, and not for revenge purposes. But it sounds like she really liked you, I just hope she's NOTHING like her older sister. But, I'm sure she'd jump at the chance.
whichwayisup Posted January 28, 2007 Posted January 28, 2007 I think a lot of my problems stem from the fact that i used to be bullied quite a bit at school. I know i brought most of it on myself though, not that anyone deserves to be bullied, but i was a bit of an antisocial geek. I dont know why, i didnt mean to be, i cant even really remember why id have taken that route. Its not happened for years, i mean im a postgrad now with a job and life, its not the playground any more, but it still bothers me. Do you think i should see someone about it? I feel so embarassed about it. It really affects everything in my life, i think thats why im kinda shy and why i get so attached to the things i love. i've always known it just never admitted it. You're not alone on this one. I know I have insecurities from when I was younger, starting grade 9. New school, and most of the girls knew eachother from grades 7 and 8, so the click was already formed...My mom thought it would be a great idea to send me to a girls private school, (which I hated and ended up leaving at the end of grade 10 and going to a public school) anyway, it was an awful experience, and I know some of my own insecurities come from that experience. Sometimes when I meet someone new, and they want to form a friendship, I question their motives and it's like cell memory takes over, I'm in grade 9 again, about to have the carpet pulled out from under my feet, and the jokes on me...It only lasts for afew mins, but I know that moment of panic and not feeling confident. Then I remember that was then, this is now and people grow up, and aren't so immature and bitchy like in highschool. You're gonna be OK and sorry that you're having a rough day. It will pass!! You've been doing excellent so far, and it's alright to have afew low days when you miss her and all that you had. And, it's great that you have ANGER. Gawwd, I still can't believe the crap she's pulled on you!!
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 29, 2007 Author Posted January 29, 2007 Nah, not really. You said her younger sister is in ya? Depending on the age..... I'm not saying anything serious, of course, and not for revenge purposes. But it sounds like she really liked you, I just hope she's NOTHING like her older sister. But, I'm sure she'd jump at the chance. Shes 2 lol And, it's great that you have ANGER. Gawwd, I still can't believe the crap she's pulled on you!! Thanks for the support, I do have anger but I cant seem to 'activate' it. I know its there, because I was pretty mad last week! I just can't seem to hold any weight to it anymore. Its really nice to hear someone else say they think shes treated me badly. I think thats what cheers me up most, to know that people are siding with me! I could cry my eyes out right now, I miss her so much.
TheDC Posted January 29, 2007 Posted January 29, 2007 Offer to buy the jewelry off of her for half the retail price and then return it yourself.
shockandawed Posted January 29, 2007 Posted January 29, 2007 Rocket, First of all, she is a worthless skank..there, feel better? She really is, but you still love that skank. I am interested in your thoughts about your childhood. I never was really bullied and had friends, but I seemed to always feel a little less worthy. Nothing probably anymore than anyone else. I think that just maybe you are strictly heartbroken and nothing more. It is easy to read into everything that has happened to you as reasons. You and I are at the same spots with our hearts, but different people. I am 42, been in a long term marriage that ended fairly friendly. Yet, I can't shake a less than 3 year relationship. I am in regional sales which means I spend a lot of time talking to strangers, customers, etc..I am definitely not shy. While everyone is critical of their appearance, I do feel I don't send women screaming down the road. I could always use improvement, but I feel I can offer something. Your mind is wandering when you say you imagine her hooking up with someone, of course I assume someone who harrassed you as a child. I kept imagining my ex living her life up with the new man, and she spent all weekend alone again. So why are we so hung up on our exes? Who knows, we miss the comfort spots, the way they made us feel, etc... I can tell you are a great guy, and obviously, you post here often which indicates you enjoy interacting with people. If you want to do some inner soul searching and see if there are things you could do better next time, then great, but don't beat yourself up all the way back to childhood. You're a good egg Rocket!
Sup Posted January 29, 2007 Posted January 29, 2007 Shes 2 lol Thanks for the support, I do have anger but I cant seem to 'activate' it. I know its there, because I was pretty mad last week! I just can't seem to hold any weight to it anymore. Its really nice to hear someone else say they think shes treated me badly. I think thats what cheers me up most, to know that people are siding with me! I could cry my eyes out right now, I miss her so much. OOOOOOOOKKKKK!!!!!!! Well, then forget it!
Author RocketMan2 Posted January 30, 2007 Author Posted January 30, 2007 Rocket, First of all, she is a worthless skank..there, feel better? Much! Thats exactly what i need to hear, over and over! Its good to hear people agreeing with me She really is, but you still love that skank.I do, and im not ashamed to admit it. That kinda leads me to think im almost coming to the next stage in healing. Im kinda starting to see it even more objectively, im not quite there but i can feel it coming. I can almost see her for the real person she was. Someone I never saw or met, but who had a beautiful, loving, caring side that she chose to show to me. For a time. There were however, many other sides to her. its hard to accept having never seen them, but im starting to accept it. I am interested in your thoughts about your childhood. I never was really bullied and had friends, but I seemed to always feel a little less worthy.Its not like i didnt have any friends, i think its just more that i had a few good friends, rather than lots of just 'mates'. Thats what people used to take the piss about. Plus my surname is ridiculously similar to a rather rude word, an easy target for anyone, not just hardcore bullies. I used to just take it like a sissy. Since those days though being with 'mature' surroundings its obviously hardly happened. When it does I don't take sh*t from anyone. They get once chance to apologise immediately or ...else. There haven't been many incidents like that though, so my feelings on the topic are mainly based on old, bad events. I think that just maybe you are strictly heartbroken and nothing more. It is easy to read into everything that has happened to you as reasons.No, it is this its always bothered me, trust me You and I are at the same spots with our hearts, but different people. I am 42, been in a long term marriage that ended fairly friendly. Yet, I can't shake a less than 3 year relationship. I am in regional sales which means I spend a lot of time talking to strangers, customers, etc..I am definitely not shy. While everyone is critical of their appearance, I do feel I don't send women screaming down the road. I could always use improvement, but I feel I can offer something.I'd say im the same (on the latter points), I'm not 'shy' at all, im really outgoing, im always up for anything. Im just trying to shake the old image. I can tell you are a great guy, and obviously, you post here often which indicates you enjoy interacting with people. If you want to do some inner soul searching and see if there are things you could do better next time, then great, but don't beat yourself up all the way back to childhood.Yeah i do, maybe i got so attached because i was overcompensating for missed opportunities earlier in life.... You're a good egg Rocket! Thanks, There are a lot of great people here! Rocket
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