Lauriebell82 Posted December 7, 2006 Posted December 7, 2006 ok this may be a really stupid or weird thing to post but i am just curious. i have been with my boyfriend for 4 months. we got serious real fast and started seeing a lot of each other and fell really in love. after he told me he loved me he started talking about a future and marriage and stuff. now he has just stopped talking about it. he'll refer to his future wife in a genertic sense but he doesnt talk about the future (like marriage future) anymore. now i am not in a hurry to get married and i am def. not expecting him to think he wants to marry me already. i'm just a little confused about why he suddenly stopped talking about marrying me. did i do something to cause this? he still says he loves me and things are going really well in our relationship. i want to get married, and i could see myself having a future with him. can anyone gve me any advice?
Krytellan Posted December 7, 2006 Posted December 7, 2006 I could totally see me doing this, and this is probably what happened. He started to get strong feelings for you and wanted to express them to you. After doing so, he thought that maybe that was a little rash, as he doesn't want to freak you out. So then he figured that he needs to keep a lid on the personalization a bit because he doesn't want to come off as a freak to you. So when he uses the "generic" wife term with you, I am 90% sure he is putting your face on her, he just doesn't want to say so for fear of scaring you. This is something I have done and it wasn't a bad thing... just a defense mechanism. If there's no other worrisome indications, dont let it bother you in the least.
Author Lauriebell82 Posted December 8, 2006 Author Posted December 8, 2006 yeah thats kind of what i thought about it too. i guess it just sort of confused me. does anyone else have any thoughts? our relationship is awesome and we really love each other so if he decides to talk about marriage in the semi-future i would like that. i just hope he doesnt keep doing the on and off thing cause that is very confusing.
che_jesse Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 Well before, when you first started dating it really was not an issue and was mostly said as a joke "Wow! Thats the best beef stew ever! I'll have to marry you!" Now that your more serious he doesn't want to go giving you the wrong impression. At least thats my guess, I've had that happen before with guys. Then they started talking about it again when they really meant it.
Trialbyfire Posted December 8, 2006 Posted December 8, 2006 Sometimes in a new relationship, people lose their heads. When things start to settle down a bit and the guy is not consistently thinking with his little brain, he realizes that he took things too fast. Don't stress over this unless he starts to grow distant. If so, you will have something to worry about.
Author Lauriebell82 Posted December 8, 2006 Author Posted December 8, 2006 my boyfriend is so sweet and i think he was serious when he was talking about the marriage thing. he says he really wants things to work out with us because he really loves me and he does a lot for me so he means it.
Recommended Posts