PLEASE HELP - My ex-gf dating another guy but says she still loves me!!!!

3 yrs relationship and we broke up for 3 months now, a month ago she said that she still loves and cares for me. She wanted to work things out, start over, date and try the feeling. After one day, she said it doesn't work out and tell me to get another girl and move on. I only recently found out from her friends that, she dated this guy only 2 weeks after we broke up and they slept together, they still do now. After the break up, she lies to me like there's no tomorrow.

This girl tell me to move on but she knows I wouldn't because I love her too much and can't get over her. I know she's holding me onto a string but I can't help it. When I stop talking to her and not picking up her phone calls, she calls me like 30 times a day, cry in voice mail, cry to me, says she's missing me as friend, she needs me cuz she's going thru many problems. Then I turn soft, I say I would care for her again, call her, be nice and do everything for her. Then she seems like she wouldn't want to talk to me when I call. I even found out that she goes Las Vegas, LA,... with the new guy (the places I always took her before)

I don't know what's going on wit her or she's playing me but I'm hurt tremendously everytime she does that. It's been 3 months but she would not let me go. Please help me how to deal with this problem. Many of my good friends tried to help me but I just need other advices from other experienced!!!!!!

Hello Quster,

My heart goes out to you. You're in a painful situation and your ex is making an extreme impact for negative emotions.

This woman shows no respect or love for you at all. Regardless if she isn't necassarily your lover, even a true friend doesn't treat a person that way. For one she lies and is using manipulation tactics (i.e.,crying on the phone, emails, voice mails, etc).

It is hard to stop all contact when you care for someone deeply, but as long as you're willing to be her doormat, she will continue her abusive treatment. IMO, I think you should put your foot down and set up some boundaries for yourself. People can only get away with what you allow them to.

Again, I am truly sorry and I hope you will lay down some firm guidelines.

a month ago she said that she still loves and cares for me.

If she loved you and cared for you she would stop this torture. Do not let her words deceive you.

I only recently found out from her friends that, she dated this guy only 2 weeks after we broke up and they slept together, they still do now.

Don't find out anything else. Stop talking to her and about her. Don't mention her when you talk to your friends or her friends.

I wouldn't because I love her too much and can't get over her.

Don't be silly now. You can and you will. It takes lots and lots of pain before you become yourself again.

From my experience it gets easier if you stop contacting your ex. (It hurts alot, but you heal quicker) Do not talk about her anymore. Try not to bring old memories back :songs, movies, pictures ect... Try new things...do new things.

We've been together for 3 years, and she was a totally different person: innocent, loved me tremendously, always there for me, do everything 4 me, care about nothing but friendship n love. Everything was going very good, I was saving up money for a big surprised proposal diamond ring and a new car. Only 2 months before the break up she changed totally. No one can even recognize her: parents, me, her bestfriend and sister. She used the line " I need space to find myself, I love u but not in love with you". I'm left hanging and still don't know what happened?

It was a shock to me, I still can't accept the fact that she can change that much and that quick. My situation maybe tougher than you guys think.

Thank you guys, for your replies, it's very hard but I'll take your advices seriously to get over this.

By the way "hurtnconfused" ??? Can u send me the whole thing of the poem, who wrote it? title?

Thank you