World has crashed down around me..

Hello everyone, I hope your all doing better than I am. I just lost the only woman I have ever loved. Today she told me she no longer loves me the way I love her to the point of marriage. Which she did at one time.

We first met on halloween of '09. We had an instant attraction, we couldn't get enough of each other. In January she made the first mention of wanting to be with me forever. In July she was asking me to sell my house and to look at rings, though I did truly love her and did want to marry her, I wasn't ready to look at rings when her divorce from her previous marriage wasn't finalized yet. Me not wanting to look at rings seemed to have changed everything.

At the time, I was practically living with her only going home a couple nights a week. But then she said I would appreciate her more if we didn't spend so much time together. But I did appreciate her, I did everything for her. Since then it has been an emotional roller coaster for me. One day it would seem like shes madly in love with me, then the next she wouldn't even return my calls. Its been like that ever since until today. For the past three days my calls have been going straight to voicemail, and she wasn't answering my messages. She finally answered me in an email today. I feel destroyed inside.

Before I met her, it had been 10 years since I last had a date. I'll never be able to met anyone as good as her. I'm a nice guy, and women think I'm cute, but I'm shy and quiet.

She's the most beautiful woman in the whole world, and I don't see how I could ever stop loving her.

It's hard to know what to say here...break ups are very difficult. I am sorry you're in such pain. Try to stop being so definitive though - using words like always and never...you WILL move forward from this...you CAN find someone who will love you like you love them....

Did she talk to you about any of the issues she was having? Did you tell her why you felt the way you did about the rings back in July? Explain it to her seriously and make sure she understood?

I'm sorry to hear about your failed relationship. Make sure you don't get too hard on yourself about this. It takes two to tango and I'm sure she didn't take all the right steps all the time.

It's hard to know what to say here...break ups are very difficult. I am sorry you're in such pain. Try to stop being so definitive though - using words like always and never...you WILL move forward from this...you CAN find someone who will love you like you love them....

 

Did she talk to you about any of the issues she was having? Did you tell her why you felt the way you did about the rings back in July? Explain it to her seriously and make sure she understood?

She didn't tell me that she was upset about me not wanting to look for rings until October when I mentioned to her that I would hope she would want to look at rings again. Then she got upset with me saying that I didn't give a **** when she wanted to look. But that wasn't true, I told her I wasn't comfortable going to look when she was still legally married. She said that didn't matter, she only wanted to look.

When we first met she said that we should never hold back if something was bothering us so we could work things out. She's never done that, if I did something that bothered her, she would show me less attention for a couple days and I wouldn't even know why.

She is damaged from her previous marriage, he abused her mentally, which puts her on the defensive. I hope she can find someone that can make her happy. I love her so much, I just want her to be happy...even if I am miserable without her. I miss her so much.

I'm sorry to hear about your failed relationship. Make sure you don't get too hard on yourself about this. It takes two to tango and I'm sure she didn't take all the right steps all the time.

Its tough, she also has a 4 year old daughter that I also love. I didn't just lose the love of my life, I lost a family that I thought I would have forever.

Just know that you are not alone and that everyone on here has been or is going through a break up. I myself am feeling a lilttle sad this morning because I miss him. But I know he does not want to be with me and wants to see other people. yes it SUCKS but its how he feels. So I will do my best to get through it. Its been about 5 weeks sence the finial break up. I feel stronger then I did 5 weeks ago. So hang in there..We can do this....

I can't stop thinking of her, I can't concentrate on what I'm doing at work, I'm constantly wiping away tears. I don't feel like eating anything, or doing anything. My dad calls me every night to see how I'm doing and it just makes me feel worse. Its only been 4 days, but sometimes I don't even want to feel better. We were going to get married and I told her I would love her forever..I don't want to break my promise and stop loving her.

I broke down and sent her an email today asking her how she was doing and if she could read a certain book to her daughter for me tonight. Now I'm just sitting here starring at my inbox hoping she replies.

Aww Hunni, I am feeling your pain. It is true pain, I am there with it all, shaking, cannot eat, crying and on it goes. All I can say is that 3 months in, I am feeling better and stronger.....until the swine does something else....

Take care and just try to realise that each day does get better. Hard but true.xx

I know you don't want to hear this but you can love somebody else. We are all capable of loving many different people - you just have to be open to it.

I feel for you and your predicament. And unfortunately I don't have all the answers.

What I am trying to do in my situation (with limited success) is to focus on what is good for me. You cannot love anyone by destroying yourself. You have to love yourself first - only then can you love another. I am trying (with limited success) to meet other women to go out with. I believe I have to take care of myself - and I need someone to help a little who will help me a little - so I have to try and find that.

Try to look at it as if you had a child - if this was their problem how would you advise them?

I don't know what to do now. She's now calling me. I don't know what she wants. She called me thurs night, saturday and sunday morning. And she's sending me pictures of her and her daughter.

She says shes messed up, whatever that means...I was just starting to feel better and now with her calling me, it gives me hope that we could get back together....but I don't want it to be false hope.

Its tough, she also has a 4 year old daughter that I also love. I didn't just lose the love of my life, I lost a family that I thought I would have forever.

That is super tough. I am in a similar place right now. My girlfriend of almost 3 years dumped me a couple of weeks ago. She has 3 kids and I have one. We were all very close for a long time. A big, fun family. But it hasn't worked out. Of course there's so much more to the story, but I just wanted to say that I feel your pain. It sucks to *almost* have a family, and then have it ripped away. It sucks bad. I gave it 110% and was willing to work through anything. She flat out said she didn't want to do the work. Just...sucks...