Exorcise Those Sayings

I've read so many stories, and they all give great perspective on my own problems. But after awhile, I see the same old excuses from those who left us. We may have used a few ourselves, but at the end of the day, just hearing/reading the words gets so annoying. Write down the excuses/words you never want to hear from a partner ever again. It might be worth a good laugh seeing that others give the same BS statements. We can pretend how sheepish and unoriginal our significant others were:

If I live to be 100, let me never again hear:

• "I need space" (I think the word "space" is permanently tainted for me)

• "We're just friends, I'm not interested in (name here) at all"

• "You're the best" (Don't ask, it's too annoying to think about any further )

Bonus Round: Phrase I want to hear and believe in

•*"I love you"

Add "Your a good woman" and "It's not you, it's me" to the list.

"I'm not ready for a relationship right now..." (2 days later they are dating someone else)

"I don't feel that way about <insert name here>."

"You're too good to good for me!" (read: "You're not good enough for me.")

"It's totally platonic." <while she's boinking him>

"I don't know what I want." (Yes she does, and it's not you.)

"I love you, I'm just in 'in love' with you."

"I've never met a guy like you." (She thinks you're weird)

"This isn't about you." (as they're ripping your heart out)

"I love you, I'm just not 'in love' with you."

I got that one last night! damn!

"It's not you, it's me"

amen.... and let me add "I love you like a sister" Fsck YOU dude! I was your wife for 8 years and now you only love me like a sister???

BAH! Work interrupted me and I found some grammatical errors. Corrected below.

"I'm not ready for a relationship right now..." (2 days later they are dating someone else)

"I don't feel that way about <insert name here>."

"You're too good good for me!" (read: "You're not good enough for me.")

"It's totally platonic." (while she's boinking him)

"I don't know what I want." (Yes she does, and it's not you.)

"I love you, I'm just in not 'in love' with you."

"I've never met a guy like you." (She thinks you're weird)

amen.... and let me add "I love you like a sister" Fsck YOU dude! I was your wife for 8 years and now you only love me like a sister???

He knows what it's like to f*** his sister?

"I'm not ready for a relationship right now..." (2 days later they are dating someone else)

• "I just want my space and to be alone. I don't want a boyfriend right now" (I want to f*ck random people)

:mad: :mad:

i need to find myself before i can give myself to someone else.

i am beginning to question my sexuality, and i don't think it's fair to string you along until i find out what it is i want.

i am moving to tasmania.

(i used these. not recommended.)

although, it never does any good to just come out and say "i don't want to be together anymore" because then you get "whyyyyyy?" and if you give the real answer, it's not enough. no one is ever satisfied with..."i just don't want to be in a relationship with you." (and when you really think about it, the reason doesn't matter, the result is the same.)

Thank you all for posting these over-used, flimsy, sorry, pathetic excuses, -you gave me the best laugh I've had today.

My ex bf, the very wonderful B**, used this old, worn-out one:

" I don't know what I want ".

(Of course you have to imagine the whiny tone along with it to get the full effect of just how pathetic it was.)

When I first heard him say that, it was when I first realized that he not only didn't have a spine, he truly did not have a heart, as well, and there was no reason for me to continue to pursue anything with him.

Truth is, he'll probably never know what he wants, and if he ever (miraculously) does get even close, -he'll probably blow it, -or it'll turn out to be the nightmare he deserves.

-Rio

" I don't know what I want ".

Ah, the ex used that one on me too. She knows exactly what she wants and it 'ain't me!"

Good. I deserve better!

He knows what it's like to f*** his sister?

hahahahha ewww so gross

Yes, you do, CaliGuy.

We all do.

(Smile)

-Rio

Dang, seems that we've all heard most of these.

What a pity that it's all just a bunch of BS.

We are all better off, though. Sometimes it seems to take a little time to realize it though.

But before I start -- I think my exgf has the worst line of all: Silence.

Now that we've all recanted the same-old tired lines, let's turn this around.... How would you break the news to your lover? Be honest with yourself, and remember that it is often more painful to people to hurt another's feelings than it is to be hurt.

As for me, I can't say I'd be able to do much better. The statement I have used in the past is: "There is no denying that I have loved you deeply. A part of me will always be connected to you as a result. Although it pains me to tell you this, I am afraid that because of all the things that you and I have talked about in the past, my feelings have changed. I feel that the best thing for us now is to separate because it hurts too much for me to try to keep this going."

Of course, the above assumes that we've been talking about our issues, and that nothing is a surprise. People who just drop a bomb out of the blue are worthless creatures -- I'd never do that.

Ok -- your turn. Now that you've told us about the crappy lines you have heard -- how exactly would you do it?

 

My ex bf, the very wonderful B**, used this old, worn-out one:

 

" I don't know what I want ".

 

Cheers, I also got that one. I'm kinda curious if they actually are confused sometimes or they think this is a good way of doing it?

Dear Melt,

The trouble with B** was that, he misled me from the very beginning, -intentionally.

He simply didn't know what else to say except "Gee, -I don't really know what I want", when he finally knew I was bringing 'the conversation' forward.

He certainly knew what I wanted, -because I'd layed it all out in black and white from the get-go.

He wanted to sleep with me.

It's that simple.

He didn't want to say it, because he knew it would mess things up for him.

He seemed kind of shy and sweet all through the relationship, but, looking back, I feel it was all an act.

His inability, to verbally communicate feelings and express himself well, -I believe (now), -was not at all an 'inability', but rather, an unwillingness, because, as anyone knows, too much information can lead to the truth too soon.

I am so angry at myself for not spotting all this, -it seems that, since my divorce almost two years ago, instead of my radar getting better, -it is just broken beyond repair.

It wasn't the divorce that warped me, (God knows I'm happy about that), -it's just that, now, I find that I may be looking for something that isn't out there, anymore.

Maybe there are no real men out there, -at least, I can't seem to run across any.

Here is the thing that really slays me about B** : he never, ever said he cared about me beyond commenting that I was 'sweet', and that he found me appealing in a sexual way.

Yet, he signed off on all his emails to me for about two months before the end with "Love, B**"" .

And he only began adding that little 'L' word when I started making noises about where the relationship was heading, -I'd even brought the whole relationship close to an end in a phone conversation, almost trusting my 'gut' instincts in doing so, but failed because I doubted my instincts, giving him the benefit of the doubt and staying in the relationship, for whatever it was.

I focused on those emails containing the only sign of caring from him whatsoever, and I didn't even realize I was in that deep, emotionally, until November.

You can't get anymore pathetic than basing the formation of your emotions on a single word at the end of a random email.

But, look, -I am never short on having the attention of many of the opposite sex on a daily basis, -it's just that I focused on one person, the wrong person, B**.

Now, I don't know what to do with myself, even after all these weeks.

It still gets to me.

I know I'll be OK, -and I'm doing everything I can to kill the emotions that are still very much there, -but I'm not over it, by far.

I have a lot of things I want to say to him, but talking to him would extract something from me that I need to keep me going, my dignity, and right now, I feel as if I've lost enough of 'me'.

I have not loved anyone (except B**) since my husband, although, I have tried to date people since then, only to discover that I'd figured them all wrong within a couple of months, and became disappointed with myself afterwards, -my broken radar.

It was actually a mixture of disappointment that I felt, and the fear of realization that my discernment skills were so off.

But then, with all these postings shown on this board, having been rattled off by some of the best and most creative liars out there to decent, trusting people, -there's hardly any wonder, at all, how I could not wind up encountering, at least, a few of them, myself.

-Rio