Guys: Red Flags You MUST Be Aware Of!!!

This post is written for the fellas but it does apply the opposite way too.

 

I think one of the main reasons that guys are devastated over the loss or break-up of their partner is because they don't see it coming. The signs were there, you just couldn't or refused to see them.

 

Even if your g/f seems like she wouldn't do any of these, for gods sake do not think that YOUR girl is ANY different and she wouldn't do any of these things. I promise you when it comes down to it YOUR girl is very capable of one or more of the actions i'm about to list.

 

1. She talks about a particular member of the opposite sex frequently.

 

2. She's not quite as affectionate as she used to be.

 

3. All of a sudden she's become more independent (in a i want to be single sort of way).

 

4. If you confront her about her feelings for the person in point 1. she becomes all defensive and claims "we're just friends".

 

5. Late nights out with boys are no longer a big deal.

 

6. She's not concerned about who calls you.

 

7. She starts hanging out with a new circle of friends that the person in point 1. just "happens to be a part of"

 

8. She quickly closes chat windows when you come into the room.

 

9. Spending time apart isn't really a big deal.

 

10. The new circle of friends suddenly becomes her primary circle of friends.

 

11. She seems to be wherever the guy in point 1. is (purely coincidental she claims).

 

12. She claims spending time apart is healthy for the relationship (while this is true, if she's the type that wants to see you everyday then all of a sudden distance is healthy, then you need to drink a nice warm cup of WAKE THE **** UP!)

 

13. Her schedule suddenly fills up with all these activities that don't include you!

 

14. She'll start to claim she "doesn't know what she wants from the relationship" (make no mistake fells what she knows is that she no longer wants you and wants some of the action from the guy in point 1.)

 

15. She'll claim she "needs to find herself" (more BS, what she's actually saying is she's trying to find the best way to let you down gently because she's far too interested with guy in point 1.)

 

16. "I'm coming back to you, i just need more time" (No she isn't! While your having your "time apart" guess who's getting her undivided attention!)

 

17. "I need a break to figure things out" (a personal favourite of mine, women seem to be particularly guilty of feeding men this dribble).

 

18. "It's not you, It's me" (i'm pretty sure this needs no explanation).

 

 

I'll post more as they come to me.

 

While these may seem clear as day when you read them, i promise you when you can feel the one you love slipping away, you can't see ****.

 

Please feel free to add to this list.

you forgot one very important one:

 

19. sex becomes less frequent or non-existant

Dam thats a very good and true list.

 

Point 1, oh so true.

When you ask her "what the hell is going on?, she says she's not treating you any differently and makes you feel like the problem is you.

add to the list, becomes obsessed with her appearance and is obsessed with working out and losing weight.

 

I don't just mean a woman that wants to lose weight, but practically starves herself or reads every label on food at the supermarket to make sure it has 0 to little calories.

If she starts becoming friends with a divorced woman or women. Certain divorced women like to recruit.

 

If she stops showing you any affection.

"If she frequents bars and clubs regularly and keeps it a secret." ..female friends are such a bad influence.

 

"If she looks her best when she goes out, however its the opposite when with you."

 

"If she takes longer than usual to call you back, or days, or never."

 

Activities that dont include you is one thing, but giving you a major bogus excuse not to see you is "Im dumping your silly a**."

All excellent fellas!

 

Keep em coming!

if she turns off her phone when she knows you're going to call her;

if you buy her a new set of lingerie and she puts it at the bottom of her drawer and never really uses it (or maybe it was just a very ugly set;));

if she starts to use the headache excuse too often or if her period lasts more than 10 days;

when she starts crying (and making you feel guilty about questioning the relation) whenever you ask her whats going wrong on the relation;

# for me the line was 'u pused my feelings away'. lol wtf?????

# the sex is non existant or when it happens ur rated at the end. like "i didnt want it but i have to admit in the end it felt really good". WTF??? ur giving me grades now??

# when ur receiving oral she nearly rips ur masculinity off in 'lets get it over with style' and when ur finishes opens the doors spits and says goodnight without any other form of affection.

# starts picking fights about small things. intentionally. so u can snap and yell so she can say ohmegosh! how can u talk to me like that? i want a breaK!!!!

 

))) hope that made u smile fellas!! we're not alone!!!!!!!!!!!

once it starts happening what do you do?

once it starts happening what do you do?

 

 

 

You get in your car and you drive away. You never look in the rear view mirror. This is THE ONLY WAY she may stop pulling away from you. You have to walk away.

once it starts happening what do you do?

 

If you confront her about these things, she will deny it until she is red in the face.

 

In my experience once you start to see or hear several of the behaviours or phrases it is already past the point of no return, however there are a few things which must do:

 

1. I personally believe you have to sit her down tell her exactly what she is doing that is causing you to doubt her commitment to you.

 

2. Tell her that all of these occurrences are not a simple coincidence because nothing could be further from the truth (she will probably claim they are)

 

3. Ask her straight out, does she have feelings for someone else, does she want to move on but doesn't have the spine to be able to break it off with you.

 

4. Whatever her answer to point #3 is, you need to tell her that you aren't going to be treated so poorly and lied to and that she needs to decide what she wants. Until she grows a spine and makes the decision you must insist she does not contact you in any way shape or form.

 

5. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES BEG, GROVEL OR BREAK NC. If it is indeed you that she wants the SHE will contact YOU!

lol, I just read this and I can say that in my relationship that ended just a few days ago, I experienced:

 

2, 3, 7, 8, 10, 13, 18, 19

 

20. becomes obsessed with her appearance and is obsessed with working out and losing weight. I don't just mean a woman that wants to lose weight, but practically starves herself or reads every label on food at the supermarket to make sure it has 0 to little calories.

21. If she starts becoming friends with a divorced woman or women. Certain divorced women like to recruit.

22. if she starts to use the headache excuse too often or if her period lasts more than 10 days; ((The period one, not the headaches))

 

 

 

This forum is like my nice warm cup of WAKE THE **** UP!)

For some time before my guy dumped me 10 days ago, I had wondered whether there was someone else. I even asked him and he denied it. So I've amended some of the list for my benefit.

 

2. He's not quite as affectionate as he used to be and makes a real effort to be cutting/cold and distant.

 

3. All of a sudden he's become more independent and spending less time conversing with me, no replies to emails or phone calls, no IM chats etc. Starting to do things without me.

 

6. He's not concerned about who calls you. Nope - didn't give a crap when I told him I was going out to dinner with a friend from work. It was a guy pal (my secretary) and we were discussing work issues, but he didn't even ask whereas previously he'd been intensely jealous.

 

8. He quickly closes chat windows when you come into the room and makes sure his laptop is password protected and locked when he's not by it. Same with mobile phone.

 

9. Spending time apart isn't really a big deal. The relationship was long-distance half the week but he initially made an effort to be at my place 4 days a week, every week... then it dropped to every fortnight and in the last two months I only saw him 4 days in both months.

 

12. He claims spending time apart is healthy for the relationship (while this is true, if he's the type that wants to see you everyday then all of a sudden distance is healthy, then you need to drink a nice warm cup of WAKE THE **** UP!) [see point 9]

 

13. HIS schedule suddenly fills up with all these activities that don't include you! [see point 3]

 

14. He'll start to claim she "doesn't know what she wants from the relationship". Yeah, the week before he dumped me, he said he didn't know how he felt about me any more. He said he didn't know whether we had any future.

Even when half the week was part LDR, we always managed to hold each other close with our words and phone calls. In the last two months I think he called me once. I called him several times and it always went ignored.

 

He was probably cheating on me wasn't he..? Otherwise there wouldn't be such distance. The thought had crossed my mind, but I didn't really want to believe it.