Can't Be Without Him

I can't be without my ex.. it's driving me crazy. I miss him wayyyy too much.... and I can't take it anymore. I've been strong.. for like 2 months now!! I've done the NC thing.. and then HE sends me this text and called me about a month ago. He hasn't returned my email.. or been on messenger (hmm I wonder if he deleted me.) Sometimes I want to just email!!!!!!!!!!! telling him how I feel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I should....but knowing this guy... he is too big headed to write back...and then I will be hurt.

I know Valentines Day will be here.. and I guess it's a good thing my phone bill wasn't paid this month... cuz they turned it off. Now he can't call. I still might get weak though, and send him an email just telling him "Happy Heart Day" or something short and nice like that.

Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Kgal,

Ever watch children playing around a campfire?

They play and dance around it until they can't stand it any longer, then they look for something -a nearby stick will do just fine- and they inch closer to the fire and watch it burn.

Just putting the stick in the fire is not enough, tho, -they eventually have to throw something into the fire.

Thank God the family cat normally knows to hide far from the danger!

(Smile)

But that's a similar picture of how we are with our ex's.

We just can't stay away.

The flames are so pretty, and, from a distance, they are only warm; move a little closer and they are warmer; put your hand into the flame and it gets suddenly hot to the touch and you may get burned.

It's risky, exciting.

Throw your heart into the flames and it is consumed.

We should all take a refresher course, it seems, on fire safety.

But we'd never listen.

It's too enticing, and besides, the pain from a heart on fire -although excruciating- is survivable.

We know that whether we admit it, or not.

That's why it's an acceptable risk to play around the campfire.

Kgal, jilted, broken lovers by the thousands will throw themselves into those flames in or around the fourteenth of this month, all of them hoping to rekindle the flame of a love that once was.

Some of them will be successful, the rest will wind up nursing 'burns' in varying degrees.

No one who is sane will be prepared to give advice to those brave enough, and believing enough, and wonderfully crazy enough, to throw all caution and common sense to the wind, and face that risk.

Certainly, not I.

But I will secretly envy you all.

(Smile)

And good luck!

-Rio