beenburned Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 I put this in the infidelity section because D's divorce is on the grounds of adultery.(we live in one of the 13 states that still recognize adultery as a fault) First temporary court appearance was amazing!! The judge ripped her H a new one! He was told if he didn't start paying child support immediately, he would end up in jail.(they have been separated for a year and a half, and H wouldn't agree to anything) My D was also awarded alimony due to the adultery/fraud being proven. He spent massive amounts on both OW during a 5 year period. He bought them both a car, one a timeshare condo on the beach, lots of jewelry for both, and lots of dinners and entertainment.(all on his $50,000.00 a yr salary) After my D filed for divorce and kicked him out, he cashed out all of his 401K and pension, and spent it all in the last year. When the divorce is finalized he will be ordered to pay half of it all back,plus half of all the money he spent on the OW, all of my D's attorney fees, and her lawyer has even asked for a small amount for all her pain and suffering at his hands. Her H has already threatened her that he will file for bankruptcy as soon as the law allows.(He has a long history of bad credit and previous bankruptcy's due to his never being able to manage money at all) Her lawyer said he will make sure to get her all she is entitled to before he can legally file bankruptcy again! The judge said he wanted them back in his court by Sept. in order to finalize everything! Her H was furious and stormed out of the courtroom! He cheats on her for half of their marriage with 2 OW, and spent massive marital funds, and expects not to have to pay any consequences? Can you say delusional?:lmao: 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BetrayedH Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Glad she is getting some payback. My state is no fault. Doubt my D will go so well. My lovely wife is still fighting 50/50 custody. Link to post Share on other sites
Furious Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 BB What a scum bucket, and I feel so bad for your daughter and your family, and am glad that the judge threw the book at him. Is castration legal in your state? hahaha 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SomedayDig Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 The sense of entitlement some people have is staggering. This guy seems like my wife's x OM in that everyone else is to blame and all should feel so sorry for him now that his wife is taking him to the cleaners. He's an attorney, but so is his wife. LOL I'm glad your D got her day in court! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Spark1111 Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 It is much harder in my state to declare bankruptcy as so many abused the system for their own personal benefit. I hope your daughter can attain some of the court's orders as it can be very difficult to enforce alimony and child support. I am glad she was at least vindicated in court and I do not mean to rain on her (and your) parade. How happy I am to hear that marital assets spent to fuel the affair is considered in a court of law as part and parcel of a divorce proceeding. I wondered about that but where I live, we recently went no-default. In one of my revenge modes after dday, I entertained a small civil suit to recoup income spent on the affair and thought of naming names and hiring a process server for the embarrassment factor. Ahhh...rationality took control and I gave up the idea. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
96nole Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 [quote=beenburned;4118728 Her H was furious and stormed out of the courtroom! He cheats on her for half of their marriage with 2 OW, and spent massive marital funds, and expects not to have to pay any consequences? Can you say delusional?:lmao: Between this wonderful specimen of garbage and SomedayDig's "friends" he mentions in his other post, I wonder if some people just have absolutely no basic concept and/or understanding of right and wrong. Are they so arrogant they think they are untouchable? Are they so selfish and self centered that they don't care as long as they get what they want? Are they so stupid they just don't get it? Take my ex for example. She took the dirtbag on the cruise I paid for. Then she didn't want to pay me back the price of my ticket that she used for the dirtbag. During mediation, the mediator had to argue with her to give me my half back. She didn't want to give me anything back for the cruise until the mediator told her how dirty it was that she took the dirtbag. If you take all the emotions out of it. Take the moral decision of taking the dirtbag out of it. Break it down to the basic, I paid for a ticket but didn't go, someone went in my place. Somebody should pay me back for the price of the ticket I paid for. To me that seems like basic right and wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Author beenburned Posted July 15, 2012 Author Share Posted July 15, 2012 Spark, The judge was so outraged that he had not paid child support(since they had been separated for a year and a half), that he ordered both(child support and alimony) to be paid in 3 days after court! Especially since it was proven beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he blew through $20,000.00+ the year after she kicked him out! The judge told everyone listening that if he was even one day late with the money, she was to file a police report for contempt of court! Her FIL called her the next morning and said he would pay the first month's money, as her H did not have it right now. Her FIL also said if his son does not pay before each and every deadline, she is to call him and he will always pay the money, as he does not want to see him go to jail.(FIL is a millionaire) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author beenburned Posted July 15, 2012 Author Share Posted July 15, 2012 96, I vote for ALL of the above answers!! Most cheaters think the rules don't apply to them! Link to post Share on other sites
96nole Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 96, I vote for ALL of the above answers!! Most cheaters think the rules don't apply to them! I wonder if some of these people even know there are rules. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Her FIL called her the next morning and said he would pay the first month's money, as her H did not have it right now. Her FIL also said if his son does not pay before each and every deadline, she is to call him and he will always pay the money, as he does not want to see him go to jail.(FIL is a millionaire) I'm sure this had nothing to do with him avoiding all responsability for his actions ... Nice job, i really hope he ends up in jail a few times [not a big fan of that law because it can be abused but in this case ... ]. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author beenburned Posted July 15, 2012 Author Share Posted July 15, 2012 Furious, My D has been through a lot in her short life. Her first H, who was her HS sweetheart, left her after only 1 year of marriage for his OW. But karma paid him back! After marrying his OW, they soon had 2 kids, she left him for her OM. She also left both kids with him! Her 2nd H has cheated on her for over half of their marriage, and spent lots of marital money on the OW. Their D is now proceeding forward through the court system. I am so proud of her strength and determination to better herself in spite of these setbacks! She has been employed with the same company since HS, and has been promoted up the ladder. She also has been going to college at night for many years, and will graduate this December with a 4.0 grade average!! Link to post Share on other sites
GLDheart Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 ... Her FIL also said if his son does not pay before each and every deadline, she is to call him and he will always pay the money...(FIL is a millionaire) Hmmm. Daddy to the rescue. I'll bet lots of this guys lack of character trace back to Daddy bailing him out in life. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Its so sad to think a wife is home doing all the work, being faithful while hes dining some one else and giving the OW all the rewards. Im glad he has to pay it back. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author beenburned Posted July 15, 2012 Author Share Posted July 15, 2012 scattered, My D has always been a career woman and handled all the work at home. Her H has always spent his days off from work doing what he wanted.(without wife and child) She is glad to be getting rid of him! Link to post Share on other sites
Furious Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 Furious, My D has been through a lot in her short life. Her first H, who was her HS sweetheart, left her after only 1 year of marriage for his OW. But karma paid him back! After marrying his OW, they soon had 2 kids, she left him for her OM. She also left both kids with him! Her 2nd H has cheated on her for over half of their marriage, and spent lots of marital money on the OW. Their D is now proceeding forward through the court system. I am so proud of her strength and determination to better herself in spite of these setbacks! She has been employed with the same company since HS, and has been promoted up the ladder. She also has been going to college at night for many years, and will graduate this December with a 4.0 grade average!! Your daughter is exceptional, to have accomplished so much, despite what she's been put through. I can see that she takes after you BB, smart as a whip and no pushover. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author beenburned Posted July 15, 2012 Author Share Posted July 15, 2012 Furious, Thank you for the compliment!:) She is very detailed oriented like me. When her lawyer ask her to get together the evidence for her court case, he had to wheel the big case in on a handtruck! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
frozensprouts Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 i wish we had your system here..some betrayed spouses really get the shaft... like a friend of mine...been married 10 years, three kids...his wife started heating with some guy who was here on a course...when he let to go back home, she left with him, leaving her husband and three kids behind ( all kids under the age of 8)... her other man paid for her to get plastic surgery, and then she joined the military...waited for four weeks for basic to start, then about a week later she found out she was pregnant with this other mans baby, so she got put on mat. leave with full pay/benefits...got posted back here, lived with her husband and kids while separated and skyping with other man every night, and moved away again to be with him a few weeks later... now says she may ant her husband back... I'm not one for violence ( don't even like killing bugs, would rather carry them outside) but this woman needs a good kick in the @rse...she has destroyed this guy too bad this guy doesn't have the composure your daughter does...she sounds like on brave and very put-togther lady....she should feel very proud of herself, and she's setting a good example for her children...sounds like she learned her strength from you Link to post Share on other sites
Author beenburned Posted July 16, 2012 Author Share Posted July 16, 2012 FS, There are only 13 states in the US that still have fault divorces. If you can prove fault with evidence, then it effects division of assets and alimony. In the cases where you can prove a parent unfit, it can even effect custody of the children. I think the people that are at fault should have consequences to pay for their actions. In no fault states, or countries, what is the deterrent? Link to post Share on other sites
Spark1111 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 FS, There are only 13 states in the US that still have fault divorces. If you can prove fault with evidence, then it effects division of assets and alimony. In the cases where you can prove a parent unfit, it can even effect custody of the children. I think the people that are at fault should have consequences to pay for their actions. In no fault states, or countries, what is the deterrent? And in the UNITED STATES military, adultery is a cause and a reason to COURT MARTIAL the soldier....whether male or female. Imagine that? Link to post Share on other sites
frozensprouts Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 And in the UNITED STATES military, adultery is a cause and a reason to COURT MARTIAL the soldier....whether male or female. Imagine that? same here, depending on the situation. when my husband cheated ( he's army), he took a huge risk...he could have been demoted, fined, discharged or even sent to prison... as it was, he took responsibility for his actions and lost a promotion...not great, but it could have been worse I really think that sometimes people forget just how much damage infidelity can do...it's not simply a "lifestyle choice" Link to post Share on other sites
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