Perce Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 My husband is really getting on my nerves lately. We have a 2 year old and a 2 month old. The 2 month old, obviously, is waking in the night. But also our 2 year old is getting up 2 to 3 times a night and coming into our room. I just walk him back to his bed, and he goes back to sleep. My problem is my husband's constant whining about his lack of sleep. (I'm the one who gets up, but he says it wakes him.) Everyday, he has to remind me how tired he his, and complains about our 2 year old's sleep "waking". I'm tired too. But, I realized before we had kids/and now, that that's just part of life. The baby will start sleeping through the night, and our 2 year old will get through this period. I also realize, we'll have many more nights in the future where we don't get the best sleep. Why the constant whining - he sounds like a little baby. He made the choice to have kids. Did he not think we'd have sleepless nights? Thanks for letting me vent! Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 children don't come with operating manuals and assembly instructions. Many people don't really know what they're getting into when they have them and you don't have to take a test and be licensed to produce them. Perhaps your husband, since he's being awakened already anyway, should occasionally get up with them himself. Late night "chats" with an infant or toddler are wonderful ways to bond with them. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 My husband is really getting on my nerves lately. We have a 2 year old and a 2 month old. The 2 month old, obviously, is waking in the night. But also our 2 year old is getting up 2 to 3 times a night and coming into our room. I just walk him back to his bed, and he goes back to sleep. My problem is my husband's constant whining about his lack of sleep. (I'm the one who gets up, but he says it wakes him.) Everyday, he has to remind me how tired he his, and complains about our 2 year old's sleep "waking". I'm tired too. But, I realized before we had kids/and now, that that's just part of life. The baby will start sleeping through the night, and our 2 year old will get through this period. I also realize, we'll have many more nights in the future where we don't get the best sleep. Why the constant whining - he sounds like a little baby. He made the choice to have kids. Did he not think we'd have sleepless nights? Thanks for letting me vent! You have a right to vent. I would be upset at him, too. I am a single parent. My ten year old boy still wakes me up at night on occasion. My daughter did it once in a while till she became a teenager. Some kids are just light sleepers. He should be counting his blessings because he could be a single parent raising two kids by himself. He should be more appreciative that you are getting up with the kids so he can sleep. If he's not taking turns with you, he has no room to whine. Link to post Share on other sites
Ladyjane14 Posted January 23, 2006 Share Posted January 23, 2006 Why the constant whining - he sounds like a little baby. He made the choice to have kids. Did he not think we'd have sleepless nights? Either he's just a GIGANTIC ass.....or he's got some sort of problem. If he's got a problem, it could be either physical or emotional. The possiblity exists that he could have an undiagnosed sleep disorder which is keeping him from getting restful sleep to begin with. It could be that night-waking with the children is more than he can cope with if his sleep pattern is already disordered....kind of like the straw that broke the camel's back. You might consider sending him to his doctor to talk about this. The doctor can recommend a Sleep Study to test him for apnea if s/he feels it is warrented. Sometimes chronic pain can be the culprit in sleep disruption, or Restless Leg Syndrome. There are ALOT of possibilities.....all of which will leave YOU living with a very GRUMPY spouse if left untreated. Here's a sleep quiz if you're interested: http:// http://www.sleepnet.com/sleeptest.html Once you've ruled out physical problems, you might consider the possibility that your husband might respond to counseling, or behavioral therapy. Depending on what his model was in developing his perception of 'Fatherhood'....the guy just might not know what it is that he's supposed to be doing. It's worth taking a look at his expectations and determining if they are reasonable or not. A guy who's model of fatherhood was less than nurturing will probably be standoffish as well. A guy who had NO model....is flying by the seat of his pants. This is something that you're definately going to want to 'hash out' between you now....because parenting problems grow at the same pace the children do. Best to have a 'United Front' early on! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Perce Posted January 23, 2006 Author Share Posted January 23, 2006 Ladyjane14, I think you really hit the nail on the head! We've been have problems for a while now, and when I think of everything that's been going on - he's just grumpy. And, he does have a sleeping problem. He hurt his back a while ago, and has trouble getting comfortable. So I guess, I'm the gigantic ass! thanks for the info! Link to post Share on other sites
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