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Feeling 30 and down...


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Old 25th January 2019, 10:29 PM   #1
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Feeling 30 and down...

If you’ve read my previous thread you won’t be the least bit shocked/surprised by this.

I’ve recently just turned 30 and once again my NOW husband made absolutely zero effort. Now just to put the record straight I don’t aspire to be like some of these people you see on social media, flaunting exotic trips away, hundreds of red roses and expensive jewellery that thier partner bought them for their birthday.

To cut a long story short we’ve not long got married and money has been pretty tight hence me not expecting lavish gifts. Saying this I did work a lot of overtime and gave my husband a few hundred pounds to clear our credit card. I thought he would have had the sense to at least keep £50 back to get me something considering my 30th birthday.

Two weeks prior to my birthday it had become apparent that he had not planned anything. Every time I mentioned my birthday hed get uptight and change the subject. Eventually this erupted into a huge argument about his lack of effort AGAIN! So in the heat of the moment he called a local hotel that always do a January deal (about £30 per person) and booked it. If he has done this of his own accord I wouldn’t have minded but he did it under sufference.

A few days later I was browsing online (and yes I admit that I was) dropping subtle hints about a bubble bath set I liked. He got really snappy with me and snarled “don’t go expecting anything else for your birthday now”

The morning of my actual birthday I woke up with a supermarket card and nothing else. My mother even bought him a balloon garland to put up for me but “he couldn’t work out how to do it” . We went on our trip away but he couldn’t have made it more obvious that he didn’t want to be there. All he did was whinge about how expensive everything was and pull faces when I ordered another drink.

To be honest the whole experience has left me feeling really flat. I’ve had a terrible time at work lately and find myself working 70 plus hours a week. Is it so wrong to just want to be spoiled (within reason) for one day and feel a bit special?
Poochy87 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 26th January 2019, 12:41 AM   #2
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Not wrong at all. Your husband sounds very selfish and cheap. Miserly individuals are often stingy with their emotions as well.
Did he display this kind of behavior when you were dating?

Another possibility is that he simply doesn't understand the importance of romantic gestures on special days.
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Old 26th January 2019, 12:44 AM   #3
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I just had a chance to look at your other thread....why did you marry this man?
If he was this self centered before marriage, he certainly isn't going to change now that he knows that you have made vows to him.

I don't think he's going to change.
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Old 26th January 2019, 12:44 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Poochy87 View Post
Saying this I did work a lot of overtime and gave my husband a few hundred pounds to clear our credit card. I thought he would have had the sense to at least keep £50 back to get me something considering my 30th birthday.
Is it possible he's concerned you're living on credit cards and didn't feel hotel, dinner and drinks was affordable?

Though there's certainly some small, personal things he could do that cost very little...

Mr. Lucky
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