Very hard place....angry

[Lily blue]

Hi all

I have another question....

Please do not read something else in to this....

 

My fiancé is a Vise president of Finance CFO

He is very good at his job.

Professional and serious person and he been doing this kind of job for 25 years but only working at a this company for 2 years now.

 

The CEO is a women. Married and has grown up children and many grand kids...

1 year older than my Fiancé.

Ever since she hired my Fiance, she liked him and liking him more and more.

Every time I attend any evants, she come sit next to him without her husband...her husband sits by him self.

About 4 month we been here few years back....my fiancé come home told me this

She told my fiancé about her marriage problems and she even lie that her husband was abusive and she never told anyone nor seek help cause of her position and no one to talk to and so on....

 

He believed herband felt sorry for her so he listen to her and kind of be a friend kind of way cause she has no one.

She start to change her looks, how she dress and all and loosing weight and all that stuff and she tell him a lot of personal things and when she is away or on weekends, she text him let him know what she is doing so on....

 

He used to let me see the text and told me everything but sometimes he won't....saying something confidential and he delete massages.

 

And we had big fight onece and I told him to stop now and he told her that this causing me uncomfortable and he told her stop texting and stuff only work related.

That was last year and been quiet.

But everytime I see her at party or events, she stare at me or him...I gave her bad look too.

 

After that I stop going and she told him too as well she don't like seeing me.

My fiance told her he is not going party or any event without me.

 

Anyway, i hate her but I can't do anything cause she is his boss and company has no rules....people having affairs a lot there.

 

My fiance now regret coming here and hates this place and also can't say much to her to stop cause she is boss.....yes you can say he can reported to HR but they will support her CEO and he will loose job instead....he knows well been and seen too many....

 

He is looking for a new job but this kind of job takes year or two to even process.

And he won't take any job paymless than what he is making so not easy to find the job matches his earning.

 

Few days a go his phone get text massage ...he was getting ready for work in the morning so I check to see anything argent ...his mom has cancer and been doing good but still so I get worry and early morning who can it be?

It was his boss

Text him "I miss you with sad face emoji....

I showed to him and got mad at him....

He say don't take it seriously because its her not him.

 

I trust him.

Its not just her...he show me text from other women flirts him not with him cause he do not respond.

Any and everybody has his work and personal phone number its haning in his work for a contact.

 

From, doctor women, nurses, ...he works at a big hospital.

Yes he is very charming, good looking, clean, good hygene, genuine, kind and very muscular fit...he is weight lifter too

So he is very appealing.

 

Some comes right out ask him do you want to have some hot fun?

 

Here is why I trust him.

He comes home same time everyday unless he has late meeting and he lets me know and comes home sharp soon as its over...I can eaily check...his work schedule.

He never ever gone out of town alone.

Never go bussiness trip.

He loves me and lets me know he do...

He say I am the best thing ever has happened and he do not need or want anyone else.

Why do I need a women like that?

He never takes his phone or hide when he is at home.

He leave his phone same place in the kitchen everyday when he is at home.

He do not go sit on his computer in his office at home or take his phone while he works out at gym in our home...

He lets me check his phone anytime.

We both do.

I once trwaten him if this doesn't stop.....he kneel and beg me not to leave and he swear he loves me only and never give any women any attention...he say he made a mistake few years back trying to help CEO and listen her problems and trying to be friendly...and she took it wrong way...

He say He never cheat on me and never will cause I am the only person he truly ever in love and want to be with and he say iam 54 and not looking for anything or new relationship.....So I trust him and we have regullar sex always ...he is not a sex crazy man anyway from the beginning we met so sex part never changed but actually getting better too

Reality, he can have most any women he wants....he got the looks, money, power....but he still choose me...I don't even have job or highly educated like most of them who works for him....

Anyway, what to do?

He told me not to mention to anyone of anybody just let it go....and especially CEO

She can fire him ...he cannot loose his job...he is looking for new job but if he gets fire, he won't able to.....

So we both stressed out, exhausted but we are stronger and closer because of it.

I too get a lot of attention and flirt from other guys too but I don't respond or flirt back...so I know its possible and he don't either but these women not giving up that is our problem.

He has no interest in her....she is not his type. I know him too.

 

My question is, CEO can do this?

I know man boss harassing females but its other way around.

At the same time, she don't want anyone to know either...very careful too

So she use texing to his personal phone knowing I know....

Sitting next to him? She is just supporting her excutives....

 

Anyway, its a headache.

Some of you may still think he did something behind my back but No....

I have eyes there too and let me know if I ask and they told me John is always busy and very professional and do his job well and he talks about me and worry about me when he has little time

And hasn't seen anything unusual.

Like I say...he never late nor gone anywhere alone nor hides his phone.

Edited October 9, 2018 by Lily blue

[MidwestUSA]

Lily, if it's any consolation, I don't think a man with the level of OCD your fiancé has would cheat. Cheating is messy. So I believe you there.

 

He needs to stand up to her and shut this down. If he's afraid for his job, is there no one higher up than he can go to? President? Are you certain HR would side with her? You're right, if the sexes were reversed, it would be an easy case.

 

You also need to go to events with him. Stand by him, look good, and ignore her. Let her stare all she wants.

 

I'm sorry I don't have a better answer, I'm sure others will chime in.

[preraph]

She's out of line of course, and he knows it, but she is his boss. He is being sexually harassed at work. In the U.S.,that is illegal, but he'd have to quit and get an attorney, when he and you both know it's just best to find another job as soon as he can.

 

You know he's not cheating with this old bag, and probably doesn't even respect her from the way she treats her poor husband, so just trust him since he's being transparent and keep hoping he gets a new job.

 

But remember, the next job he gets, he may not have his boss after him, but there may be five young hot ladies after him instead -- and then he might be tempted, and then you'll be worse off than with this old cow he doesn't like that way.

[MidwestUSA]

But remember, the next job he gets, he may not have his boss after him, but there may be five young hot ladies after him instead -- and then he might be tempted, and then you'll be worse off than with this old cow he doesn't like that way.

 

Lily states that he gets hit on by young hotties as well, so that's already happening.

 

I'm guessing the 'old cow' is about my age ; there's no age limit when it comes to behaving badly.

 

Lily, if she's texting him on his personal phone, make sure he saves all those texts. One day, she may just take it too far, and you'll have enough evidence to consult an attorney, or present to HR. A hospital should have a legal team as well. He's not been there long enough to know if she has a history of harassment, but someone there might. It wouldn't surprise me. Hospitals are a hotbed of indiscretions. I was fired for knowing of my boss's affair with a coworker. They got their comeuppance later, but I was SOL.

 

He's been honest and open with you. Stand by him, and support him in whatever he decides to do - whether it's pursue action against her, or start looking for a job elsewhere.

 

Meanwhile, I guess you can hope that she finds an easier target to latch onto.