Opie Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 My wife normally wears her wedding ring. It's an engagement ring, wedding band pair. She left for Vegas over the weekend to attend a kind of family reunion, five days four nights. But, as it turns out, chose to leave the rings at home. When I ask why she deflects the question, seems insulted or assures me of her love but doesn't answer the question, "Why?". She is beautiful and in great shape but having a new middle-aged concern over being attractive to other men. Is she just seeking some reassurance? Seeking something physical? Is this nothing or is she coming home with a tramp stamp and chlamydia? How do I understand this if she won't tell me?
standtall Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Big, big red flag. Is she displaying any other signs of straying? Does she have any close male friends?etc... 1
turnera Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Carry her phone everywhere, even in the bathroom? Have to make stops after work? Suddenly put passwords on her phone or computer?
make me believe Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Why didn't you go to the family reunion with her? 2
Krytie TV Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Any response short of "I forgot it" in response to the questioning about the ring is unacceptable. Even that response would be questionable under the circumstances. I wish I could spin this for you in a way that would make you feel better. I just really can't imagine a scenario here that would leave me to believe that this is no big deal. 3
turnera Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Deflection is one of the first signs of cheating. Accusing you of being insecure or crazy or 'seeing things' is another. 1
Krytie TV Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 And to be bold enough to leave where you would see it seems a bit of a slap in the face. Does this woman show you any emotional attention when you're together?
Radu Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 My wife normally wears her wedding ring. It's an engagement ring, wedding band pair. She left for Vegas over the weekend to attend a kind of family reunion, five days four nights. But, as it turns out, chose to leave the rings at home. When I ask why she deflects the question, seems insulted or assures me of her love but doesn't answer the question, "Why?". She is beautiful and in great shape but having a new middle-aged concern over being attractive to other men. Is she just seeking some reassurance? Seeking something physical? Is this nothing or is she coming home with a tramp stamp and chlamydia? How do I understand this if she won't tell me? When women lie, they change the subject [generally]. I think you need to get paranoid. turnera is right, after this you can expect to be accused of being insecure/crazy.
pteromom Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 And I think that since she left it where you found it shows that she had no bad intentions. If she was planning on an affair, she would have worn it and just hid it in her purse or hotel room. It IS weird that she won't tell you why she didn't take it though.
turnera Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 My guess is, if she isn't cheating, she is VERY unhappy with the marriage, and she left them there so you would wake up and start taking it seriously. 1
pteromom Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 That could be. Could be she left them there on purpose in hopes that it would bother you and you will fight for her or start working harder on the marriage. But that's hard to say without knowing the dynamics of your relationship.
CarrieT Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Hmmmm... maybe the OP's wife is Vlove who posted here.
brokendreamz Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Fly out and 'surprise' her - or at least tell her you're going to... Then watch what she does/says next. If the worst comes to the worst then don't be there when she gets back. Go no contact and hope she BEGS you to return. 1
Star Gazer Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Hmmmm... maybe the OP's wife is Vlove who posted here. That's too much of a coincidence... I sense double-trolls!! 1
Eddie Edirol Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Hmmmm... maybe the OP's wife is Vlove who posted here. Haha, thats a good catch, but she posted that today, and she says she is back home already, while the OP's wife is still in Vegas. Regardless, this situation doesnt look good. I hope the OP's wife isnt playing games.
Star Gazer Posted May 16, 2012 Posted May 16, 2012 Haha, thats a good catch, but she posted that today, and she says she is back home already, while the OP's wife is still in Vegas. Regardless, this situation doesnt look good. I hope the OP's wife isnt playing games. The OP's wife left over the weekend, for a 4 night trip. It's Wednesday...
Bellechica Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 How many MW take off their rings? I never take mine off.....
g450 Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 Yeah sometimes I wonder about postings like this myself. Anybody with an iota of sense knows exactly what it means when a woman takes of her wedding band and flies to Vegas. For real? If the posting is genuine then my heart goes out to the OP. He is about to feel a world of hurt either way.
Bellechica Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 ME and I didn't cheat. A ring means nothing if the commitment isn't in the heart. So maybe the OP shouldn't rush to assume the worst....
turnera Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 I haven't worn my ring in 20 years, once it stopped fitting. Didn't change anything.
turnera Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 Opie, if you come back, will you answer this? Are you sure it was a family reunion? Did you verify that with her family members?
WonderKid Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 I think somethings up too. You never take off the ring. And go to vegas!!? Yeah, something's up.
standtall Posted May 17, 2012 Posted May 17, 2012 I didn't wear my rings for years. He treated me like a second class citizen. The ring was a representation of what a marriage should be. I didn't cheat and I traveled without him. I don't know what the OP should do, but the assumption that the removing the ring means an automatic screw isn't necessarily so. Your situation is not the same as what the OP is saying, but at this point he has checked out of this thread anyway.
Recommended Posts