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Marriage & Life Partnerships Debunking the old-ball-and-chain stereotype one couple at a time.

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Old 26th December 2003, 9:08 AM   #16
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Maybe I will call this friend and invite him to dinner or something. My wife has suggested this but not acted on it, maybe it would be a good idea if I did.

Recently she aquired a cell phone. All well and good.
However, the consequent bills were quite expensive and detailed phone calls in particular to one number. I asked her about it and she told me it was a friend from work, a male friend, who she says is becoming a good friend.
Flustered, hard as I might, I just can't get over the cell phone purchase and the hundreds of calls. A cell phone is an essential tool in the adultery trade.

I have some questions:

1. How soon after the cell phone purchase did the calls start to the "good friend" at work? If soon, she may have obtained the cell phone for the purpose of communicating with her "good friend."

2.Did she make any of these calls in your presence? I suspect not.

3. Did you ever walk in on her when she was on one of these calls? If so, what did she do? Hang-up, keep talking...

4. Last, she works with this guy and what is it about their jobs that requires 6 telephone calls a day on a cell?
Has your wife's job duties changed in any material way? If not, that would be cause for concern.

Good luck, my friend.
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Old 26th December 2003, 11:02 AM   #17
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Posts: 244
Yeah, bark's right!

Don't let your guard down because if this thing is still going on she is going to be hyper-careful about it now.

Try to not put yourself against her.

Maybe here is an idea. Tell her you suspect something is going on and it is too much for you to deal with, and if she wanted to do this, fine.

Bring it right up to her. Don't be domineering about it. Keep a physical distance of at least 4 to 6 feet so you are not too close to her( like across from a table).

Explain that maybe it IS best that she find a place of her own, away from this one, to deal with her affair.

Why shoulder her burden?

Let us know.
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