babysang Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 I think my hubby may be looking at porn on the internet. Do you guys know of anyway I can tell? He has deleted the cookies, emptied the recycle bin, and cleared out the history ~ which is why I think he's hiding something. We've gone through this once before and I told him I didn't care if he looked at porn but not to hide it. If he's doing it again and hiding it I will be furious!! Any suggestions for 1) how to find out for sure if he did and 2) why is he doing this, AGAIN! Link to post Share on other sites
Bill Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 You could setup "spy" software on the computer. The bigger problem here is trust and honesty in your relationship. You do not trust him and he is not honest. Seek and ye shall find. Link to post Share on other sites
Jamie31 Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 I really don't know how else you could find out if he cleares the history, that's the only way that I knew of. Maybe you should just try talking to him again. If you don't care if he looks at it, there should be no reason why he would try to hide it from you. I mean if he is just looking at porn. There is always a chance, however, that he is looking at something else, but I don't know why he would keep anything from you if you said you didn't care. Just try talking to him about it again. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruzmurf Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 I believe when a person looks at porn several things happen in stages... I feel if he is looking at porn then his interest is not being taken care of... Please look into ways to communicate with him... Most men will not think about porn when we are happy unless it just happens to cross the screen/aisle or we seek it out. Then several things happen after that... a man chooses to continue to look or he will bypass it. If you suspect something is wrong, maybe there is. Talk to him, and ask him about it (do not attack him). Be open and ask to share and review with him... and if you cannot or are not open to this area then work with him. "Help him learn" that porn only leads to more porn. It can become additive. In addition, if view wronged soft porn will soon become hard porn and counseling will be needed to help him turn around. My main point is to take this moment to review what is it that is leading him to want to look at porn. Example, are you two not spending enough time together, sexual intimacy is not being provided (Find ways to spice up your relationship), or learn to be open minded about porn. It is not always "bad" it can also be helpful. AGAIN! Do not ridicule him or belittle him. Talk with him, or spice up the relationship by going out and buy romantic sleepwear or just welcome him home naked. Open communication and willingness to make adjustments in a relationship is needed. You have nothing to loose but everything to gain. Link to post Share on other sites
Just A Girl2 Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 Ruzmuf, First of all, she's admitted she's not sure if he IS viewing porn now/if that's what he's "hiding"...it may well be that that's not what's going on here at all. She obviously doesn't have a problem with him viewing porn, as she said..she simply has a problem with her husband hiding things from her, which is totally understandable because there shouldn't be secrets within a marriage. Also, not sure why you've felt it necessary to invite her to email you for whatever info you have to share. I'm sure anything you have to share could be posted here for others to perhaps gain benefit from. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruzmurf Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 Just A Girl2, I understand your point however somethings are better specified on the side....ie %%%First of all, she's admitted she's not sure if he IS viewing porn now/if that's what he's "hiding"...it may well be that that's not what's going on here at all. %%% The linked provided early will allow any pc user to track all information taking place on a computer being viewed and keystroke typed. %%%She obviously doesn't have a problem with him viewing porn, as she said..she simply has a problem with her husband hiding things from her, which is totally understandable because there shouldn't be secrets within a marriage.%%% There is a degree of concern... You are absolutely right about secrets (should not be any in a marriage)... but if he feels the need to hide it... then he is viewing something she may disapprove. If indeed, he is viewing porn. Now if it is something she may disapprove of... then she should communicate with him.... %%%Also, not sure why you've felt it necessary to invite her to email you for whatever info you have to share. I'm sure anything you have to share could be posted here for others to perhaps gain benefit from. %%% The reason I referred to comment further on the side is because... on the internet there are message boards such as this that is helpful and can be explicit. Porn happens to be a controversial topic. Link to post Share on other sites
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