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Old 7th February 2002, 1:38 AM   #1
Dan
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upset over party my wife went to

My wife attended a party, which I couldn't attend because I had to work that evening. After having one drink, she felt really groggy. She stepped outside to get some fresh air but passed out. We're not sure what happened, but she was found outside without any cloths on. I got a call and was told to pick up my wife because she wasn't feeling well. They brought her inside and gave her coffee to sober her up, but failed to give her anything to cover her up. When I arrived I was shocked to see her sitting in the middle of the party completely naked looking glassy eyed while everyone was looking at her. I covered her with my jacket and took her home. The next day I took her to the doctor who said that there was nothing to worry about. There was no sign of rape and though she may have been drugged, it had passed through her system.

I feel very angry but I don't know who to be angry at. I don't know who, if anyone, drugged her. Nor do I know who stole her cloths or what all they may have done with her while she was passed out. I asked around, but no one knows what happened. I do know that no one offered her anything to cover her, but they did try helping her out with some coffee. She says she would rather I not think about it and that she herself would prefer to forget the whole evening. Should I just try to forget
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Old 7th February 2002, 2:13 AM   #2
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Re: upset over party my wife went to

You have no choice but to try to forget.

First, you need to instruct your wife on the responsible intake of alcohol.

Second, you need to talk to your wife about her choice of friends. Out of the entire group of drunken scumbags and scumbaggetts at the party, it seems at least one person would have had the respect and consideration to cover her up.

You can tell her I said her friends are totally worthless and without an ounce of class.

If I were you, I'd be pissed at the whole bunch of them. You may find it very hard in the future to trust your wife to handle herself properly when she goes out with her "friends."

Blamewise, 50% your wife, 50% her friends.
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Old 7th February 2002, 2:45 AM   #3
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Re: upset over party my wife went to

Why weren't the police called? If, in fact, she's telling the truth about drinking only one drink, then she was clearly drugged and possibly assaulted. And she should be able to remember who gave her that ONE drink, right? Clearly criminal charges should have been brought. At minimum, the police should have been called so at least they could investigate. Why you, Dan, did not call the cops is mind-boggling.

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My wife attended a party, which I couldn't attend because I had to work that evening. After having one drink, she felt really groggy. She stepped outside to get some fresh air but passed out. We're not sure what happened, but she was found outside without any cloths on. I got a call and was told to pick up my wife because she wasn't feeling well. They brought her inside and gave her coffee to sober her up, but failed to give her anything to cover her up. When I arrived I was shocked to see her sitting in the middle of the party completely naked looking glassy eyed while everyone was looking at her. I covered her with my jacket and took her home. The next day I took her to the doctor who said that there was nothing to worry about. There was no sign of rape and though she may have been drugged, it had passed through her system. I feel very angry but I don't know who to be angry at. I don't know who, if anyone, drugged her. Nor do I know who stole her cloths or what all they may have done with her while she was passed out. I asked around, but no one knows what happened. I do know that no one offered her anything to cover her, but they did try helping her out with some coffee. She says she would rather I not think about it and that she herself would prefer to forget the whole evening. Should I just try to forget
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Old 7th February 2002, 10:06 AM   #4
BeenThere
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Re: upset over party my wife went to

I'm with Gweedo on this one. The police should have been called and the crowd questioned. It's clear that if your wife is telling the truth about only having *one* drink, than she was clearly drugged...or perhaps willing took something other than alcohol that night. Someone there knows SOMETHING but isn't talking. I really don't know how easy its going to be for you to "forget"...
Quote:
Why weren't the police called? If, in fact, she's telling the truth about drinking only one drink, then she was clearly drugged and possibly assaulted. And she should be able to remember who gave her that ONE drink, right? Clearly criminal charges should have been brought. At minimum, the police should have been called so at least they could investigate. Why you, Dan, did not call the cops is mind-boggling.
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Old 7th February 2002, 8:22 PM   #5
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Re: upset over party my wife went to

I dont understand why the party was trying to feed her coffee if she has passed out. And if she did awaken to atempt to drink coffee she would have covered herself.
Quote:
My wife attended a party, which I couldn't attend because I had to work that evening. After having one drink, she felt really groggy. She stepped outside to get some fresh air but passed out. We're not sure what happened, but she was found outside without any cloths on. I got a call and was told to pick up my wife because she wasn't feeling well. They brought her inside and gave her coffee to sober her up, but failed to give her anything to cover her up. When I arrived I was shocked to see her sitting in the middle of the party completely naked looking glassy eyed while everyone was looking at her. I covered her with my jacket and took her home. The next day I took her to the doctor who said that there was nothing to worry about. There was no sign of rape and though she may have been drugged, it had passed through her system. I feel very angry but I don't know who to be angry at. I don't know who, if anyone, drugged her. Nor do I know who stole her cloths or what all they may have done with her while she was passed out. I asked around, but no one knows what happened. I do know that no one offered her anything to cover her, but they did try helping her out with some coffee. She says she would rather I not think about it and that she herself would prefer to forget the whole evening. Should I just try to forget
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Old 9th February 2002, 7:51 AM   #6
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This is outrageous

hi dan,

something about this whole scenario doesn't sit right with me at all.

i have to wonder if:-

a) she may have taken something, which she has not told you about;

b) something very dodgy was going on at this party with her work mates (what was this party in aid of? any reason why you weren't there? how many other women does she work with?)

c) did she really have only *one* drink?

d) her drink was spiked

i sure as hell wouldn't be able to forget something like this until i had the whole event investigated. i have never - in my life - heard of a bunch of people at a party who let a person lie naked, with no dignity, in front of everyone..."but here, have some coffee". this situation reeks of something very fishy. and how such a possibly mind-altering drug could pass through her body so quickly is beyond me. although i'm not the expert on drugs so it's likely i'm being ignorant.

if she can remember being offered coffee, then she surely must remember being naked.

if something like this happened to my sister or a friend, i would be absolutely seething and demanding an investigation of the events of that night. to put it bluntly, this is severly f***ed up.

i don't even know your wife, but i'd like to know why she was treated like this and even though she is partly to blame for being somewhat irresponsible, i would like to know who else was behaving so irresponsibly that she was found naked and NOT ONE PERSON offered to help her out.

someone or some people know more than they are letting on.

tricky situation though, because she might be highly embarrassed and not want to pursue anything.

have a long talk with her if you haven't already and even consider contacting the police.

best wishes
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