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Transitioning to a long-distance relationship

Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

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Old 19th February 2018, 10:16 AM   #1
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Transitioning to a long-distance relationship

Iíve been with my girl for coming up to two years now and itís come to a time where Iím required to move overseas for work.

I currently live in Australia and will be moving to the UK in about two months whilst she remains in Aus to finish her studies.

We are both fully committed to the relationship and want to try whatever is needed to make it work around these changes. There will be some flexibility for me to return home for a visit / her to visit me, but naturally we have our concerns as we have never done something like this before, as well as the distance being a particularly painful thought, sitting at a 20+ hour flight and costing about $1300 US for a return ticket.

I was basically just looking for some tips, tricks, doís, doníts etc for transitioning to and then maintaining a long-distance relationship from any of you who may have had / is currently in a successful one.

Anything you may have to offer in regards to this would be greatly appreciated!

Thank you
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Old 19th February 2018, 10:28 AM   #2
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Communication, communication, communication. Use all the methods available to you: social media, text, email, Skype / facetime, phone etc.

Set up a date night . . .via skype at least one per week so you can "see" each other.

Don't forget about snail mail. A letter is so much more tangible then an email or text.

One thing my EX & I did during out LDR was send trinkets. If one of us did something unusual -- went to a tourist attraction or different city -- we sent the other a souvenir, something little like a shot glass or a pencil that says I heart whatever. It helped make it tangible that the other was thinking about us when we were apart.
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Old 19th February 2018, 12:39 PM   #3
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We had a cross-continent LDR for 2 years. Closed the distance years ago and still happily together now.

How long will it be before you can close the distance? This is a key factor IMO.

Skype (or similar) programs are your best ally. When we were long distance, the SO would leave his Skype on all the time and set it to auto-accept calls from me. So I could call him at any time and "see" him, even if he was sleeping or out (obviously, that would just be an empty room) or studying etc. We spent a lot of time just "sitting" together on Skype even if both of us had work/study to do, sorta like how RL couples can be in the same room but not necessarily doing the same thing. You don't necessarily need to go to the extent that we did, but I would strongly prioritize voice/webcam communication wherever possible.
~Perfection is about accepting that we cannot control everything and letting go of some of our preconceived notions.~ -Spiritofnow-
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Old 19th February 2018, 5:04 PM   #4
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Welcome to the UK, you will be wanting to go back to Aus in no time and not just because of the lady your leaving there, but for the weather you will miss!!!

Like someone else said, communication and a lot of it, phone calls, texts, emails, skype all that stuff, lots of updates and honesty.
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Old 20th February 2018, 8:46 PM   #5
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Thanks so much for the insights Donnivain and Rainah

To answer your question Elswyth:

Originally Posted by Elswyth View Post
How long will it be before you can close the distance? This is a key factor IMO.
That’s where it gets tricky - given the industry that I’m in (film), there isn’t too much opportunity here in Australia, especially at the level I am currently at. I’m very lucky to have these upcoming opportunities with the company in the UK at such an early stage of my career, but even with that in mind, I’d predict anywhere between 2-5 years to get a proper solid grounding for my career. That’s the bit that’s making it so difficult - I really have no idea how long it will be for.
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