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What do you think about a girl calling a guy "dude"?

Kay_3

By Kay_3,
in Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy

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Kay_3

Kay_3

Posted
Posted

Hey guys!

 

I recently met this girl in my hometown at a party. We exchanged numbers and I texted her and said that "We should hang out sometime again". She was right away giving me options when to hang out (to be precise she wanted to meet tomorrow). However I am busy for the rest of the week so she asked about next week. Now we are probably going out on Wednesday next week. However, after we made the plan we kept texting, she seemed quite interested. Asked questions and referred to what I said. But then it happened:

 

"Don't worry about it dude you will *continues with a sentence*....!"

 

So, well, normally I'm pretty turned of when girls call me dude. And I "learned" that girls calling guys "dude" means that it is only platonic friendship? Especially the ones I am interested in. Is that a red flag and she just wants to hang out in a friendly way?

Or is my stance on this topic rather outdated? We are both around 20 and from the west coast!

 

Should i just wait how the "date" goes? Or just try to avoid her from now on? I don't wanna get toooo attached and be hurt as this happened multiple times already.

 

Greetings

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PRW

PRW

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Posted

Duuuuuuude! Who cares if a Dudette calls a Dude "Dude"??? You worry me by the very fact that you are worried about that.

 

"We should hang out sometime again"

Never say crap like that. It is horribly weak and indecisive. When you make a date is needs to be decisive at a specific day/time/place.

 

She was right away giving me options when to hang out (to be precise she wanted to meet tomorrow). However I am busy for the rest of the week so she asked about next week. Now we are probably going out on Wednesday next week.
Great! She did your job for you. But don't relax in it,...she won't keep doing that. You need to be the leader making the plans. It is fine to listen to her and take input from her so that you plan things she would enjoy,...but the job falls on you.
However, after we made the plan we kept texting, she seemed quite interested.
Stop doing the texting crap,...she will lose interest fast. Maybe a couple texts mid-week between the dates if she is the insecure teenage girl type, but if she acts like an adult she may not even need that.

 

So, well, normally I'm pretty turned of when girls call me dude. And I "learned" that girls calling guys "dude" means that it is only platonic friendship?

Bunch of nonsense. Who told you that crap?

 

Is that a red flag and she just wants to hang out in a friendly way?
You are the man. It is your job to make the date taste like a date. If you follow her around like a little puppy dog waiting to be told what to do,...then yea,...you'll end up in the Friend Zone faster than you can say "Duuude!"

 

Or just try to avoid her from now on?
What kind of "scaredy cat" nonsense is that? You need to have the attitude that if she doesn't want you it is her loss.
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smackie9

smackie9

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Don't go by their words but by their actions. If she ain't trying to touch or grab you during or by the end of the "date" then you are friends zoned...IMO.

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kendahke

kendahke

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What's wrong with telling her you don't like being called "dude"?

 

Or just try to avoid her from now on? I don't wanna get toooo attached and be hurt

 

Why does it require all of this drama? Just tell her that being called "dude" turns you off.

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The Outlaw

The Outlaw

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Don't overthink it. It doesn't mean anything. Just enjoy your upcoming date with her and good luck. :)

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...
serialgf

serialgf

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Dude I totally understand your concern! Though I don’t think it’s anything to worry about this early on, and obviously the whole “dude” thing represents some baggage from your past so try not to project that on the new lady.

 

But you’re not crazy. I call everyone “dude” but it’s true! I only reserve it for platonic friends (and I call girls dude too) but I wouldn’t call my boyfriends dude EXCEPT:

1. If I’m mad at him/trying to get a point across and seem tougher (if that makes sense)

2. If it’s early on and I’m not sure where things stand and I’m just trying to play it cool/casual

3. It just slips out because I call everyone dude (probably wouldn’t happen in a text but maybe especially if I’m texting while distracted)

 

So, yeah, there might be some reason she called you dude but also there might just be no reason at all. Enjoy the date and the beginning because we all know it only gets more complicated and you’ll be wishing for the “dude dilemma” to be your biggest concern again! Lol

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snowboy91

snowboy91

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Don't get too worried about it. Everyone calls everyone dude these days (the 90s seems to be back!)

 

Whether this girl is interested in a platonic friendship or dating depends on how both of you feel when you're around each other and interacting with each other. Not on whether she uses the term "dude" or not. You stressing about it is probably going to make you miss the important stuff!

 

(FWIW: my current partner (together 1 year) used to call me dude when we started dating. She still occasionally does. It's just how we roll!)

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