IMRUSMILEY Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 Ok so I snooped on my bf who is moving into a new apt. He told me he bought a new bed and when it was being delivered etc. I find out that he actually took a bed from one of his buddies and blatantly lied to me. Ok it's not cheating but don't ya think if he lies about something like that then he may just be pathological. I'm wondering if most of the stuff he says is bull. I always think his stories are farfetched but give him the benefit of the doubt because why else would he tell them. What do you all think? How do you identify someone who is pathological? Our relationship is not even one year old...would you just walk away? I love him and love being around him but that's not enough...I need honesty and trust. What's more is that I made up my own lie to ask him straight in the eyes if the bed was new and if he had it delivered as he said and he looked straight into my eyes and said "Yes". Link to post Share on other sites
GirlDown Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 maybe he was embarrassed at not being able to buy a new bed. i think you are the one with the problem. chill out. Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 Maybe there's more to the story, just ask him. How did you 'snoop' to find this out? Link to post Share on other sites
tanbark813 Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 If somebody lies about something stupid then it's pretty much guaranteed they'll lie about something big. Trust me on this one. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 It's not a relationship anymore, it's an adventure. Link to post Share on other sites
upsetnhurt Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 There has to be a bit more to the story here, can you fill us in? Have you caught him in any other lies? How is your relationship outside of this incident? Have you approached him and asked him for the facts? If you have and you still believe that he has in fact lied to you then you have a real problem on your hands.......because trust and honesty is a key component to a successful relationship and as one of the other posters mentioned, if one lies once they are bound to lie again. First it is the bed, then who knows what! Link to post Share on other sites
GirlDown Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 i think she's making way too much of this. i have a birthmark that i hate. i told an ex-boyfriend it was a burn. i don't know why, it was embarrassing for me to say it was a birthmark. i never lied about anything else to him. i never cheated, and it never lead to any problems. had we been together for longer, i may have told him what it really was, i may not have. i guess i'll never know. if she caught him in a lie about something that affects their relationship, i can understand getting upset. but this is stupid. and if it's so dishonest of him to lie about a bed, then it's just as dishonest of her to snoop. she should try sticking to her own standards, maybe. nothing like looking for drama. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 I think it's not that big a deal, other than his capacity to tell small lies, which to me just means that one shouldn't be surprised if he tells a slightly larger one later. And my thought is that he was lying because he thought his g/f would be mildly grossed out at sleeping in a used bed. Link to post Share on other sites
onlyhuman Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Girldown hits the nail on the head! I have some real nasty orthapedic scars all over my legs, shoulders and knee's. I tell everyone I was attacked by a shark. Link to post Share on other sites
GirlDown Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Originally posted by Cecelius I think it's not that big a deal, other than his capacity to tell small lies, which to me just means that one shouldn't be surprised if he tells a slightly larger one later. And my thought is that he was lying because he thought his g/f would be mildly grossed out at sleeping in a used bed. that was also my thought. and as for the first part, that goes for everyone on the entire planet. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Originally posted by IMRUSMILEY What's more is that I made up my own lie to ask him straight in the eyes if the bed was new and if he had it delivered as he said and he looked straight into my eyes and said "Yes". Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Originally posted by GirlDown maybe he was embarrassed at not being able to buy a new bed. i think you are the one with the problem. chill out. I agree a 100% on this. Link to post Share on other sites
GirlDown Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 glad to see i'm not the only who thinks who thinks is over the top. i thought maybe i was being a little naive or insensitive. actually, no i didn't. Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 I find it paranoid and controling. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 You're overreacting. Maybe he wanted to buy a new bed but couldn't afford one and was worried that you would worry about money and what he could/couldn't afford further down the line. It wasn't right of him to lie to you, but he obviously has a reason. DO you really want to push it? Maybe it was unintential and obviously he didn't expect you to find out that the bed wasn't brand new. Who cares!!! DO you love him? Does he treat you well? That is what counts. If you catch him in another lie, then yes, talk to him but I would let this one go for now... Link to post Share on other sites
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