Melrose78 Posted November 17, 2019 Posted November 17, 2019 In previous post I've talked about a guy I started seeing. He's going through grief after a few sad events that happened this year. Ok so I'm really confused. He keeps messaging or calling to checkup on me. I'm starting to wonder if it's out of feeling guilty he started something and realised it wasn't a good idea at the moment. Or because he does like me n it's his way of staying in my life. He messaged last night saying he hope I had a good weekend. Because I'm trying to move on somewhat (and admittedly hoping we possibly try again down the track) I'm not allowing myself to wallow in disappointment. I said I had a very busy but good weekend. Asked how he's was. I got no response. Kinda concerned me because he's not someone that does that. He's not a jerk lol. I messaged him again this morning and said I'm just checking in and making sure he's ok. He's response was very abrupt this morning. And it seems to be after I kinda made a comment about not waiting last week. I've stepped back and stopped messaging him first. Giving him space. But it kinda feels like his emotional are all over the shop and he's not knowing what to do with them. He wants to keep in contact but at a basic Level. Maybe me being detailed in what I'm doing in my life is too much for him. Knowing I'm moving forward without him. I'm trying to not complcate his life any further but wonder if that's what I'm doing. Or do I need to just stop overthinking Iike most do. He commented on a picture the other day saying I'm beautiful. But is that also his own guilt?? See. Over thinker number 1 here!
preraph Posted November 17, 2019 Posted November 17, 2019 He's probably mad you were "busy" this weekend. We have a saying here in Texas. He needs to **** or get off the pot! 1
NuevoYorko Posted November 17, 2019 Posted November 17, 2019 I haven't read your other posts, but this one is confusing. Is he currently in your life, or out of it?
preraph Posted November 17, 2019 Posted November 17, 2019 In a nutshell, they only met earlier this month on OLD. He has a recent loss of both a mother dying an a breakup and seems ambivalent about dating despite the fact he put himself on OLD. He keeps saying he respects her, whatever that means, while she tries to figure out what he wants. Of course, seems like until he makes up his mind he's ready, best to let him heal or whatever, but he's still contacting. And not got attitude all of a sudden. Probably because she went on about her weekend.
Author Melrose78 Posted November 17, 2019 Author Posted November 17, 2019 I think I figured it out. Being the investigator I am I went on the dating app we met on (I'm invisible and had deleted it originally then half rewrote it again) I noticed his profile came up. Not one for mincing words I rang him up and asked him about it. I basically said why are you on there if your telling you can't have a relationship at the moment. I said if for whatever reason you decided I wasn't right for you, tell me. He said he had gone on there, yes. He had noticed my messages to him were gone. He didn't know why he was back on. And basically he knows what he had started to feel for me when he started to crumble. He's made his profile invisible again. And kept apologising, saying he didn't mean to hurt or upset me. I said I don't own you. You do whatever you feel you need to do to make you happy. If being on there is it, so be it. From the impression I got me saying I had a busy, but good weekend plus last week the comment about me not waiting was a trigger. He knows he's not able to commit because he's emotions are all ****ed, but also knows the connection we have. I think he was actually trying to find me on there. He sounded pretty confused. I take what he said as the truth. I'm good at reading people.
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