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Golden days of OKCupid - anyone else remember?


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Old 8th April 2019, 6:55 PM   #1
DLI
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Golden days of OKCupid - anyone else remember?

Hi! First post here. First of many I hope.

Anyone else here remember the golden days of OkCupid? From 2014 - 2016? Iíve recently split up with someone who I actually met through OKC in mid 2016 and figured I would download it again and make a new profile.

It seems to have changed now so your messages only go through to people who have liked you back, who defeats the whole purpose in my opinion. I was able to meet so many people (and a fair few dates too) from sending them the first message back in 14 - 16 and it sadly has changed now.

Does anyone know of any other dating apps that are like OkCupid from its golden years? Cheers!
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Old 8th April 2019, 7:38 PM   #2
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@DLI I too have pretty much given up on OKCupid because of the messaging restrictions (which were put in place in Dec '17). Before that change, I was only 'there' for one month but did 'meet' a nice woman.

Coincidentally today I gave up on POF and never thought zoosk, ourtime, eharmony, or elite were any good. The one dating site I still find useful is match.com. But I also believe any one person's success with a dating site will depend a LOT on their age, gender, and where they live.
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Old 8th April 2019, 10:46 PM   #3
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I remember. It still worked okay for me after the change, even though I really liked it better before the change. Also, I still received messages after the change from people I hadn't "liked" so the system seemed to favor women. I heard the same was true for other women. Or men figured out out a way around the system. I was lucky and matched (meaning, we both "liked" each other) with a wonderful man last March 2018 and we've been together since! So there is an OKCupid success story.
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Old 8th April 2019, 11:32 PM   #4
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I hated that system on OKC. It seemed to require you to look through a number of profiles and yay or nay them before it would unlock more matches who had liked you. For the lazy OLD'er like me, who prefers to just sit back and let messages come in, it really cramped my style. It could take a month or more for me to see a first message from a very cool guy, super annoying.
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Old 10th April 2019, 1:56 PM   #5
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So I bought A List on OKCupid a few days ago and haven't had that much luck YET. But once again, are there any other free dating apps you guys could suggest that are similar to OKCupid back in the good old day?
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Old 10th April 2019, 5:14 PM   #6
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Hinge. I've been liked and a message came through from them. To answer back, I had to like them back so it's basically the same. Good luck!!
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Old 10th April 2019, 9:36 PM   #7
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It's similar to Tinder too, not being able to message someone unless they like you too. It does save people from sending unwanted messages to others who are not interested and will never answer, so that is an upside to the new system. If both people "like" each other there is at least some interest on both parts.
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Old 12th April 2019, 4:32 AM   #8
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Actually, I was using okc back in 2015 as well but recently I don't find this app too interesting or efficient. Go with free apps/ sites and opt. in for some premium features on Tinder or Luxy.
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Old 12th April 2019, 7:17 PM   #9
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OKCupid was the best back 2010-2016!

Now, itís like tinder. I really enjoyed okcupid, I had such great dates on there!
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Old 12th April 2019, 11:23 PM   #10
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I remember when you could talk to multiple people at once and had a date every weekend

This new system sucks and I logged off for good.

I tried bumble, tinder, pof and theyíre all pretty much the same now

They really killed off a good thing
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Old 13th April 2019, 6:46 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Oceansfun View Post
OKCupid was the best back 2010-2016!

Now, itís like tinder. I really enjoyed okcupid, I had such great dates on there!
Yeah it really is like Tinder... and they basically encourage you to ignore people, since you have to get a match if you want to say something back. I'm sure most people don't want to match up with someone they're (probably) not attracted to, you don't want to give the other person the wrong idea. (Also you now can't win someone over and change their mind)

Like a while ago when I was briefly using the app, a girl sent me a nice message but I wasn't interested in her at all. There was no way for me to thank her and let her down easy. So I think because of stuff like that it's actually worse than Tinder
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Old 13th April 2019, 8:46 PM   #12
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For some reason, I had practically ZERO success on OKCupid. While for actual dating apps (Bumble, Tinder, Hinge, Coffee Meets Bagel), I had MUCH more success.
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Old 15th April 2019, 1:36 PM   #13
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I've been enjoying reading all the replies! But I'm surprised no can can suggest another app that is similar to OKCupid back from a few years ago. Surely there's a market for that?
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Old 15th April 2019, 8:37 PM   #14
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@DLI
I see it as the 'next big thing' phenomenon. The paradigm now is Tinder: phone app, swipe right, swipe left, hookup, next. To me it's superficial. But if that's what the online dating services believe the market wants, that's what they'll deliver and nothing else.

I also keep 'saying' it's influenced by what the users are looking for - quality or quantity, sex or love.

Examply: I'm looking for an LTR. I'm pretty much 'done' with every service except match.com, primarily because I keep seeing the same old (old) women on all the services. At least (where I live) match get the largest stream of 'new blood'. But it, like POF and OKCupid, is going more and more 'Tinder' all the time. Two recent changes illustrate my attitude.

There used to be a search by name feature. It's gone now. What it allowed was that if I noticed a woman who might be potentially compatible but I was planning first meetings with other women, I could make a note of her name and it was fairly easy to 'look her up' later. Now, without a way to 'bookmark' a woman, I feel 'encouraged' by the way the services works to immediately contact ANY woman with potential so that I don't miss the opportunity. It definitely feels like 'hookup culture' to me.

Another change was the recent removal of 'salary' from profiles. Superficial it may be, but wealth and the social status it's a proxy for is just as much a 'deal-breaker' for many people as appearance, age, religion, politics, education, etc, etc. Like any other deal-breaking characteristic, it's a waste of both people's time to meet if that deal-breaker is there. Again, it feels to me like promoting 'hookup culture' every time a service removes a characteristic from profiles while leaving 'the old reliable' - looks.

I don't mean to demean folks who are more interested in hooking up and are fine with the way the service works encourages an immediate decision based on looks. I'd just like to see more information to allow (well, ME) more flexibility to know more about a potential date, to let her know more about me, and to facilitate me trying to meet new people at 'whatever' rate is comfortable.
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